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Posted by The Antagonist (Member # 484) on :
 
Being a new driver (no, I am not 16!) I am relatively unexperienced.

A normal cloudy crappy day in good ole Washington state... so I decide to go to the store and treat mysefl to some caffeine. Little did I know that Caffiene is a killer, in more ways than one. I was about to turn into my neighborhood entrance from the highway, a spot notorious for its car accidents. Low and behold! I began my turn, and a very large hick-sporting truck with a gun rack in the back has appeared suddenly in front of me. Attemting to apply my brakes rather urgently, I find that my shoe...damnable shoe, has caught on the corner of the peddle (as unlikely as that sounds).

SMACK!

Ooops...

Finding a suitable egress from the car, I swap insurance numbers and such with this back-country fellow. The damage to his car consisted of a scrath, approx. half an inch in length, if even that much.

My car? A twisted bumper, smashed headlight... all in all not a bad run for my first try. I would be proud had I done it on purpose.

Now, the reason for the accident? No, not bad kharma, you pot-smoking, peace-loving, flower worshiping hippies! It was my own inexperience and bull-headedness. From this day forth, I am going to regimentally beat myself with a wet noodle or some other ellastic piece of wheat-based product, to remind my self of my idiocy during and before this incident.

And before I go....

Arrrrrrrrrrggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

[ November 29, 2001: Message edited by: The Antagonist ]


 
Posted by Mr. Christopher (Member # 71) on :
 
My first accident was a trip into the woods in a full-size sedan. The car didn't fare too well. But, I learned from that experience. Plus, we now have a car that handles better.
 
Posted by akb1979 (Member # 557) on :
 
My first accident was not my fault. I was sitting in my car at college eating my lunch when the idiot next to me reversed out and turned too soon. Buggered my right wing and bumper. I was well pissed, but he paid for it and two months later had an even bigger car to hit others with!
 
Posted by Balaam Xumucane (Member # 419) on :
 
My eighth accident, I was rushing out to lunch from school and wasn't paying close enough attention. I munched this guy's bumper. I would've driven off, but he was sitting in the damn car! He was pretty pissed. The insurance $$ got me a sweet cadillac, though.
 
Posted by David Templar (Member # 580) on :
 
I just know that my first accident is going to involve me falling asleep at the wheel, and running a minivan off the road. I'm going to walk away from it, but the family inside the van would all be killed. The father, Mike, has just gotten a raise and is planning to take the family to Disneyland. The mother, Sara, is going to be expecting to give birth to a healthy baby girl next month. Chris and Cindy, their two fraternal twin children, has just gotten a really cute golden retriever puppy who they named Max, who was also killed in the crach. I'm just going to stand their, by the side of the lake, as the fire fighters fish their car out of the lake...

OH GOD! I KILLED THEM! I KILLED THEM ALL!! IT WAS ME!!! TAKE ME AWAY, OFFICER!!!

You see, that's why I don't drive. I also have scenarios involving preschoolers and beloved house pets, incase there are no lakes nearby.
 


Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
My first accident involved snow and ice. Luckily, I just tapped the other fella's car. Heck, he didn't even report it to the insurance company - or charge me for the bill (nice fella').

My second and third accidents have both involved deer. They suck. However, as with all situations involving animals running across the road, the fault was not mine (although it probably would've been if that first one had succeeded in knocking me into oncoming traffic...)

And today, due to the rain, my foot slipped off my clutch ... which resulted in me stalling. Embarrassing, although not in a "gimme your insurance card!" kind of way.

I do drive a lot, and the best arguement for a kind God as Omega believes in is that I don't get in more accidents. I narrowly avoided plowing into a Buick's door ... (the owner pulled over to the side of York Road to visit an antique store ... threw her door open to oncoming traffic. Woulda been her fault, too); almost got creamed by a car in the Econo Lodge parking lot ... he was speeding AND on the far left side near the opposing building (this was that idiot Soviet I work with who thinks there is a "Jewish conspiracy" out to keep him from getting any deliveries) ... and other instances ... thankfully, few would be my fault, although some certainly would be.

Anyhoo.
 


Posted by Siegfried (Member # 29) on :
 
My first auto accident happened way back in September 1987. I was a happy-go-lucky kid who had just started the third grade. I was riding my bicycle when a car that was speeding down my street ran into me. I was crossing the street at the halfway point of the street. It's a typically narrow residential street, and I saw the car turn the corner onto my street as I began crossing. From experience, I knew that a car going the speed limit of 30 mph was not going to hit me. But the driver was going significantly faster than that and he was staring at his radio changing the station.

I flipped off my bike and landed on the sidewalk about ten feet from where I had been a second early. My bike was thrown to the other side of the street. This is what people have told me since I've blacked out everything from just before impact to finding myself on the sidewalk. I was taken by LifeFlight to Hermann Hospital where I spent the next month in traction. The accident had broken my left femur, broken my left tibia in a compound fracture (meaning the bone was sticking out of my leg), and crushed my left fibula.

During my hospital stay, I had to undergo four surgeries to set the leg and repair the bones. I had to have a small part of my hip bone removed and transplanted into my lower leg to replace the part of my fibula that had been crushed. At the end of my month-long stay, I was placed in a body cast. This extended from my mid-stomach to my feet. My left leg was completely encased, but my right leg was exposed from the knee down. In late February 1988, the cast was removed and I began the process of learning to walk again. A couple months later, I had finally regaining most of my mobility.

On the plus side, my run-in with a little red sports car has impacted my driving in a positive way. I go very slowly in all neighborhoods. I pay careful attention to kids playing near streets and people walking in the street. Whenever I sense that someone is going to do something stupid, I start planning where I going to veer off to or how I'm going to react. I think this has helped me become a rather safe driver. Now, if I could only work on my speeding on the freeways...
 


Posted by MIB (Member # 426) on :
 
Damn dude! That sounds awful.....and painful. I'm glad you made it through that alive.

The Antagonist, I'm glad you were not badly hurt in your case of extreme misfortune.

As for me, I'm not gonna be driving anytime soon. The insurance premiums for someone like me are outrageous, plus I don't have a car. Before I get my license, I'm gonna have to get a job to pay for the insurance. In order to get a job, I must get a car and insurance so I can drive it. geez. I'd give damn near anything to be in a place that has a bus system.

[ November 29, 2001: Message edited by: MIB ]


 
Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
quote:
someone like me are outrageous

Someone like you ... ?
 


Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
"Teenagers", I'm guessing?

Siegfried: You didn't say what happened to the guy driving the car...
 


Posted by Michael_T (Member # 144) on :
 
That's interesting, I had a car accident last Tuesday when my sister and I were going home after buying the turkey. The 1991 Toyota Camry we were in was totaled while the 1991 Toyota 4Runner lost a bumper.
 
Posted by Grokca (Member # 722) on :
 
My first accident I laid down my motorcycle, I was unharmed but my passenger was left lying in the road broken and bleeding. It was a very sad sight, 6 out of 12 beers broken.
Don't feel to bad about the accident nobody was killed and it happens to us all. Does wound your pride though.
 
Posted by Vogon Poet (Member # 393) on :
 
Was the turkey OK?! 8)
 
Posted by Mojo Jojo (Member # 256) on :
 
So far, my record has been scratch-free. 'Course, I only been drivin' for a couple of months, so that ain't sayin' much

Still, I am utterly amazed by the reckless stunts *some* people manage to pull. There's always something... interesting happening, and you need eyes in the back and sides of your head - you can't let your concentration slip for longer than a microsecond, basically.

[ November 30, 2001: Message edited by: Mojo Jojo ]


 
Posted by CaptainMike (Member # 709) on :
 
I've never hit anything.

Correction: I've never hit anything that noticed (or was around to notice it was me) and I've never hit anything i had to take responsibility or pay for. Ive actually had some pretty spectacular screwups though
 


Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :
 
I've never hit anything moving. I managed to reverse into parked cars, bollards, old people fairly frequently. And someone once drove into the side of my car, but that was my fault for pulling out of the junction too soon. Still, if it hadn't happened I'd have been stuck working at Pizza Hut all over Christmas, so I didn't really care.
 
Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
My only accident so far was rear-ending a Saturn that stopped in front of me while I was looking at the cross-traffic.

Interestingly enough, the driver of that car now sits in front of me in one of my classes, and has three or four classes w/ my roommate.
 


Posted by Siegfried (Member # 29) on :
 
TSN: What happened to the driver? My memory is still a bit hazy on all of this since then happened when I was 8 years old. I've also never really asked my parents a whole lot about it. I do remember that the police on-scene ticketed the driver for wreckless driving. My parents also filed a law suit against him or his insurance company. A lot of this is really hazy, but the driver was in court with us and admitted wrongdoing. The judge awarded my family $30,000. That was placed into a trust fund that I took possession of on my 18th birthday. What I really can't remember is how my medical bill was paid for. Including everything from the hospital to physical therapy resulted in a bill over $100,000.
 
Posted by The_Tom (Member # 38) on :
 
Which is why I prance about singing the praises of universal health care.
 
Posted by LOA (Member # 49) on :
 
Car Accidents? I know nothing of those

I'm glad you weren't hurt though.... car accidents are scary things. Luckily, It's been almost a year since my last one. 'Course I'm still injured from the one before that, but it's just a fact of life now, so why dwell?

Don't be too mad at yourself though-- just learn what you can and move on. If you dwell on it, you'll probably just make yourself crazy!

Oh, and one last thing-- the word of the week is "monkey". Don't forget that, okay?

~Liz
 


Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
A friend of mine was in an accident today.

Imagine the intersection of Cranbrook and Greenspring Rds: it's a cross, with lights. There are no arrows.

Anyway, a woman on Cranbrook E. was waiting to turn onto Greenside N. Another car on Cranbrook W. was trying to turn onto Greenside S.

Woman made the turn ... and didn't see my friends Saturn at all. He hit her van's sliding door, and is okay (his car, however, isn't. Interesting side note, a year ago this week he wrecked his other Saturn when an old lady pulled out in front of him on Charles St. in Baltimore).

Anywaaaay ... lady's fault (she even got a ticket for blocking Mike's "right of way").


 


Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
You didn't say where your friend was driving. From the description, I have to assume he was headed north on this "Greenside"?
 
Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
Whooops. Sorry.

No, Cranbrook had the green lights. He was headed west on Cranbrook (two lanes in each direction).
 


Posted by The359 (Member # 37) on :
 
I have never hit anything at all. The only damage on my car is from my sister's stupidity...
 
Posted by OnToMars (Member # 621) on :
 
QUOTE] I've never hit anything moving. I managed to reverse into parked cars, bollards, old people fairly frequently. And someone once drove into the side of my car, but that was my fault for pulling out of the junction too soon. Still, if it hadn't happened I'd have been stuck working at Pizza Hut all over Christmas, so I didn't really care.[ [/QUOTE]

Well, Liam, that's because you drive on the wrong side of the road...
 


Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
Is it that hard to figure out how to quote someone?

Pizza Hut? You mean, Pizza Cardboard?
 


Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
Oh... So, the directions you gave in the original anecdote were the direction in which each car was headed. Well, then I had it completely backward...
 
Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
Sorry.

But not quite.

Lady in van was on Cranbrook east (as in, the right side of Cranbrook Road heading in the east direction), but she was waiting to turn onto Greenside North.

The guy blocking her line of site was on Cranbrook west (as in, the left side of Cranbrook Road heading in the west direction), but he was waiting to turn onto Greenside South.

My friend was traveling west on Cranbrook, in (from her perspective) the far right lane (and in lady in van's POV, the far left lane). She decided to attempt to make the turn, because she didn't see his car.

She pulled out, he slammed on his brakes, but the wet roads (and lack of significant distance) did not provide enough to stop his vehicle in time, and he plowed into her sliding door. His car is in the shop.

The lady's insurance company is footing the bill, and she recieved a ticket for blocking his right of way.

She also threw a fit when he hit her and called him, among other things (and I wasn't there so he could've made all this up -- and I'm sure many of the 'colorful metaphors' were added by him), "the dumbest fucking lousiest sack of shit fuck to ever get a driver's license."

Apparently, she said this right in front of the cop who witnessed it all.

To which he said, "Ma'am, I'm afraid I'm going to have to give you a ticket for blocking this gentlemen's right of way."


 


Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :
 
"Pizza Hut? You mean, Pizza Cardboard?"

Quite possibly the worst insult I've ever seen.

And Pizza Hut is quite obviously the best take-away pizza place (or at least it is over here).
 


Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
I feel sorry for you. I mean, pizza comes from Europe, and the best you've got is Pizza Hut?
 
Posted by Grokca (Member # 722) on :
 
We refer to it as Pizza Slut
 
Posted by OnToMars (Member # 621) on :
 
Pizza Hut is actually nice over there. My group went when we went to England (a nice change from Royal Navy food) and it was an actual nice sit-down menu restaurant! We were shocked. It was the only food over there that tasted the same as America (I happen to like Pizza Hut, so it was all good).
 
Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :
 
Yeah, it's a sit down thing. It's in the upper echelons of "brand name fast food that people have heard of." Tastes nicer than McDonalds, but costs more, obviously. Tastes worse than proper Italian restaurants obviously, but is cheaper.

In the catagory of Dominoes, Pizza Hut, and, er, the others, it wins. It's also sells bear, which is nice.
 


Posted by The_Tom (Member # 38) on :
 
I thought Canadians were the only ones who ate bear. And musk-ox.
 
Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :
 
No, I made a typo on purpose to give Jeff a chance to come up with a good insult against me. He needs help, the poor lad.
 
Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
I haven't been online ... sue me

You can sell whatever you'd like Liam, just so long as you don't sell Milwaukee's Best (I mean, Beast).

Now, frankly, I wouldn't want someone delivering a big mammal carcass to my house, but you English have a strange way of doing things, so ...

History: Pizza Hut was a "nice sit down menu" resteraunt for a great many years until they tried to break into the delivery business. They suck at delivery.

[ December 01, 2001: Message edited by: Malnurtured Snay ]


 
Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
Douglas Adams had a thing or two to say about England's lack of pizza delivery in one of the Dirk Gently books. I think it was in The Long, Dark Tea-time of the Soul, but I could be wrong. I'm sure Simon knows...
 
Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
 
quote:
London was the place she liked living in most, apart, of course, from the pizza problem, which drove her crazy. Why would no one deliver pizza? Why did no one understand it was fundamental to the whole nature of pizza that it arrived at your front door in a hot cardboard box?"

The Long Dark Tea-Time Of The Soul
 


Posted by Balaam Xumucane (Member # 419) on :
 
Mmmmmm, pizza...
 
Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :
 
You do have to wait half an hour for delivery at the best of times. At peak times, such as weekends or after the pubs shut, it can be an hour easily.
 
Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
We were running about 30 - 45 minutes tonight.

So I take an order from this woman about 7ish, and she calls back like 5 minutes later wanting to know where her pizza is. Hello, I told you 30 to 45 minutes ya' deaf bitch! Be patient. People.
 


Posted by Balaam Xumucane (Member # 419) on :
 
Next time ask her if she's got a fax machine...
 
Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :
 
We live not two minutes from the pizza joint, and it can STILL take them 45 minutes to get the pizza here.

Now riddle me this: why don't they actually COOK our frikin' pizzas? The dough is still raw when it gets to us!
 


Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
That's not good.

As for the 2 minutes away thing ... if you call at Friday night (and if they're anything like us), then there are probably 40 or 50 deliveries up before yours. Delivery time (first order, first deliver) usually depends on:

a) How many drivers are scheduled

b) How big the delivery area is and how far those runs are spaced out over them

c) How badly traffic sucks

Therefore, even though you may only be a mile away, drivers will be busy taking deliveries to addresses far past your house because they ordered before you.

Not to mention that with business on a Friday night, it can often take 10 to 20 minutes for someone to start *making* your pizza after you ordered it (even if it *is* a double conveyour belt oven).

Either that or they're just slackers. *shrug*

Request your pie to be well-done. They should push it back in a bit longer and make it nice and crispy for ya'.
 


Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
So London does have pizza delivery? Hm... What about in 1988, when TLDTotS was written?
 
Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :
 
We DID request it well-done. There's a permanant note in our file on it. We empahsize it every time we get one. It's still raw dough.
 
Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
See, if I keep stubbing my toe on the same step, I'll avoid the step.

a) Check it before you pay the delivery guy. If you don't like it, send it back (er ... I wouldn't trust a re-make, if I were you).

b) Find a new place to order from.
 


Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :
 
I don't know. I didn't live in the centre of London when I was 8, and if I did, I can't imagine I'd have ordered many pizzas.

The example I gave was from Walthamstow, which isn't in the city centre. Slap bang in the middle, I don't know. I suppose it depended on whether there was a local delivery place.

I imagine though that in the 80s, there'd have been a fair few less places covered than there are today.
 


Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
Isn't the city centre *usually* 'slap bang in the middle' of the city?
 
Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
Yes. It's called a synonym. Something you use when you don't want to just keep repeating the same word over and over again.
 
Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
Uh ... I'm wondering why Liam said that it wasn't in the city centre, but rather, the middle of the city. You didn't answer that.
 
Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :
 
Synonym! Cheers Tim, I've always wanted to know what that was called.

Okay Jeff, listen. I shall break it down for you.

"The example I gave was from Walthamstow, which isn't in the city centre."

Walthamstow isn't in the centre of London. New sentence.

"Slap bang in the middle, I don't know. I suppose it depended on whether there was a local delivery place."

In the centre of London, I do not know what the situation is like.

Got that?
 


Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
 
Ah, 'cuz see, what I thought you were saying was that the pizza place wasn't in the city centre of Walthsmstow, but might've been 'slap bang in the middle' instead.


 


Posted by The Antagonist (Member # 484) on :
 
Uhh, so let me understand this more easily. You live 2 minutes from a pizza place. You call for a delivery to a place that is 2 minutes away. They typically don't make it for 10-20 minutes after the call. So here's and idea. Call and order a pizza, wait 15 minutes. Drive down and pick it up, that way if it is still raw and uncooked, you can send it back to the oven while you're there. Then drive home. If it is really 2 minutes away then why hve it delivered??

On second thought, citing my previous post, driving is a bad idea. Don't do it.
 


Posted by Jernau Morat Gurgeh (Member # 318) on :
 
Yeah, I worked in a pizza place in Cape Cod one summer *stomach rumbles with the memory*. Anyway, they had that thing the Antagonist described. "Pickups", they were called. I'm sure your pizza place would do it if you asked, as it's less hassle for them too.
 
Posted by CaptainMike (Member # 709) on :
 
I dont see how people could eat non-delivered pizza.. doesnt seem right somehow
 
Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
It's the same damned thing...
 
Posted by Mojo Jojo (Member # 256) on :
 
Works for me. And I don't pick 'm up, either.
 


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