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Posted by The First One (Member # 35) on :
 
QUAIL, MORTALS!

The doom that was foretold has come to pass. After you lot successfully weathered my TOS barrage, you had my gander up well and proper, and no mistake. Therefore I have no option but to subject you to my most merciless assault yet, a flood of publicity photos and press shots!

Heck, even I can't think of anything to say about this one!


 


Posted by Krenim (Member # 22) on :
 
Tasha: *whiny voice* But Will... I don't want to be the one to die...

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Ah... Now I enter these hallowed halls a conqueror... Yes...

-Megatron, "The Agenda, Part Three"


 


Posted by The Vorlon (Member # 52) on :
 
Frakes: "Must... Fight urge to... slip... hand... downwards..."

Sirtis *through teeth* "Do and die, John."

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Lyta Vorlon: "Our great mistake. Our failing. And now your failing. The error is compounded."
Delenn: "What mistake?"
Lyta Vorlon: "The first one, the one from which all mistakes proceed: The error of Pride..."

-- Kalesh Naranek, Last of the Vorlon
www.orc.ca/~jheinbuc/
 


Posted by Saltah'na (Member # 33) on :
 
Riker: Hey, let's say we go back to my quarters..... I make a good split pea soup.

Troi and Tasha: MMmmmmmmm.........

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I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation
 


Posted by Jeff Raven (Member # 20) on :
 
Denise:*thinks* ...and if he puts his hand as close as his other hand is to Marina, I'm gonna break it.

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"That is the exploration that awaits you: Not mapping the stars and studying nebulae, but charting the unknown possiblities of existence." - Q, All Good Things...


 


Posted by RW (Member # 27) on :
 

Riker: *don't look down.. gotta fight..the urge..to ..look..down*
 
Posted by RW (Member # 27) on :
 

Sirtis: "GET THE HELL OFF MY SHOULDER!!!"

Frakes: Shoulder?


 


Posted by The Excalibur (Member # 34) on :
 
Riker: Yar gets the neck pinch, and I get Deanna.

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Dramatis Personae

 


Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
 
Yar: "Well, thanks for taking us to the aquarium, Commander."

Riker: "No problem. So, who's up for more oysters?"

Troi: "Why are you always on about oysters, Will?"

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"The record of my unspeakable crimes, in previous lives, in previous times, indelibly stains the pages of history."
--
They Might Be Giants

 


Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :
 
Riker: I am a love god. Women love me. I mean really love me.

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My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring, we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really.
 


Posted by Saltah'na (Member # 33) on :
 
Riker: Well, so much for this away mission, now let's go to Risa!!!

Troi and Tasha: Yippeee!!!!!!

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I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation
 


Posted by Saltah'na (Member # 33) on :
 
Troi: What, no strange funny costume this time, Billy boy?

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I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation
 


Posted by Saltah'na (Member # 33) on :
 
Riker: Boy is it scorching hot here.......

*Tasha pushes him into water*

Troi: Is that a great white shark I see there?

*Jaws music plays........*

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I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation
 


Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
 
Deanna seems to be the only one enjoying the trip to the Betazed sewerage plant...

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Alamaraine, count to four...
 


Posted by Xentrick (Member # 64) on :
 
Riker: "Possessive? Me?"
 
Posted by Xentrick (Member # 64) on :
 
Riker thinks: Maybe if I press two nearly-perfect women together hard enough I could mold them into one completely-perfect woman. Mmmwwwaaahahahaha!


 


Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
Troi: "Bill, what is that diging into the back of my shoulder?"

Riker: "Erm... My thumb?"

Troi: "I don't think so..."

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"I fart in your general direction!"
-John Cleese, Monty Python and the Holy Grail
 


Posted by Antagonist (Member # 76) on :
 

*Star Trek TNG theme music plays*

Frakes: "Hi, folks. My name is Jonathan frankes, you probabley know me from such TV appearances as...umm, Star trek. Anyway I'm here with Marina Sirtis and, ahhh, I forgot this other chicks name, but I'm here with both of them to tell you about 10-10-321. yes 10-10-321 is cheap, and you can get all your calls for under a buck..."

Sirtis: "Yes that's right, Commander, I save $2,000,000 in subspace comm relay credits using 10-10-321 on my calls to Betazed alone!"

Yar: "How does 10-10-321 work? Well when you dial it it bypasses the primary and secondary verterium flux field coils in the subspace comm relay network by 120% Likewise this causes a chain cascade reaction in the graviton spinometers which are then engergized by a artificial singularity, thus saving you from a overly expensive credit bill, and it also helps when you're being eaten alive by big black tar-monsters and you really need to make that last phone calls to home.

Frakes: "So dial 10 10 321 today and save!"

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"Truth is cheap, information costs."
 


Posted by Xentrick (Member # 64) on :
 
Will Riker, space pimp: "Well, which one will it be? Tasha, the Lieutenant of Discipline, or Deanna, the Goddess of Empathy?"

Ferengi tourist: "Take an out-of-town third-partyy check?"
 


Posted by The Excalibur (Member # 34) on :
 
ISN News: These three people was attacked and given bad hair cuts by a blue alien screaming, I should have been number one!!!!!!!

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Parallax


 


Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
Antag: Her name is Denise Crosby...

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"I fart in your general direction!"
-John Cleese, Monty Python and the Holy Grail
 


Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :
 
Frakes: Good job Denise, can't even notice the join.

Sirtis: (muttering) could say the same thing about you Jon.

[This message was edited by PsyLiam on March 30, 1999.]
 


Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :
 
Frakes: There, this should prove that I'm not gay once and for all. Especially to LeVar. Oh, I do hope that I haven't hurt his feelings. I hope he doesn't misinterpret this photo

Sirtis: Er, Jon?

Frakes: Oh, bugger.

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'It's okay to only know three chords but God, put them in the right order'
-Hank Hill

 


Posted by Saltah'na (Member # 33) on :
 
ROTFLMAO@Liam.

Dammit, you beat me to the punch!!

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I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation
 


Posted by Jeff Raven (Member # 20) on :
 
Frakes: Sorry Ladies, but Paramount has decided to let one of you go. Starting tomorrow, one of you will die in a giant oil slick. Cheese!

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"Bickering is pointless." - Spock, Miri
"I'm real easy to get along with most of the time, but I don't like bullies, and I don't like threats." - Janeway, State of Flux
 


Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :
 
Riker: "Tasha, I just wanted to tell you, I LOVE YOU, MAN!"

Yar: "That's great, Bill, but you're not getting my SynthBud Lite."

Riker: "Oh... Deanna, I ju�"

Troi: "Stuff it, Bill."

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"About as useful as a narcoleptic rickshaw driver."
-James Lileks
 


Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :
 
Frakes: eany-meany miny mo...

Cosby: What ya doing? Aer you picking one of us?

Frakes: No, not at all. *whispers* okay, I picked Denise. Can I have a raise now?

Skin of Evil writer: No.

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'It's okay to only know three chords but God, put them in the right order'
-Hank Hill

 


Posted by The First One (Member # 35) on :
 
The winner is AndrewR. Runners-up are The Vorlon, and Tahna Los for revealing his seduction technique. Come on over and let's swap recipes, big boy. . . 8)

Honourable mention to The Excalibur if he explains that blue alien gag.
 


Posted by The Excalibur (Member # 34) on :
 
The Blue Alien was Mott.

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The Naked Time



 


Posted by Saltah'na (Member # 33) on :
 
Seduction technique? What seduction technique? I gots no seduction technique?

And if you want recipes, I just take food and fire it up on the stove, microwave, toaster, etc. Interested?

------------------
I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation
 


Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
 
*Starts dancing to the Ewok Song from the end of Jedi*

yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh! a first!

and thankyou!

I really didn't mind my one either

La La... Da DAaaa DA daaaa dada DAaaaah... lah lah la lala laahhh lu lulu laaaaah laaaa lhaaaaaa...

------------------
Alamaraine, count to four...
 


Posted by The First One (Member # 35) on :
 
Andrew may be disqualified, the decision to be taken pending his divulging of which Ewok song at the end of ROTJ he means - the original 1983 one, or the hippified Special Edition one. . . }B)
 


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