PC Format have finally put up some of my reviews on their web-site. This is very exciting, if only because I get to prove to Cartman's stupid doubting Canadian face that I'm not a big fat lair and that I'm better than all of you in every way.
Now that I've insulted you, I'd like some help. I'm probably going to be applying for a job with these people within a year. That means I have to sharpen my skills to the point where people will physically bleed upon reading one of my cutting remarks. Plus I need to become better at horribly overuse metaphors, like I just did. If people could throw some criticism, comments, advice, apples or anything this way it'd be really, really appreciated. I already have to review Sniper Elite and NBA 2006 this week, despite having very little experience in both basketball and killing, and with your help I'm sure I can make them the best damn pair of half-page-reviews-that-I-don't-get-paid-enough-to-do in the whole world.
I love you all.
-------------------- Yes, you're despicable, and... and picable... and... and you're definitely, definitely despicable. How a person can get so despicable in one lifetime is beyond me. It isn't as though I haven't met a lot of people. Goodness knows it isn't that. It isn't just that... it isn't... it's... it's despicable.
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
The prefabricated phrases, the elipses, the metaphors going nowhere... you have the PC Format style nailed on! The article is very good, Liam. Keep it going that way.
And, about not knowing a gaming genre, just make it up and nobody will notice.
Registered: Jan 2001
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posted
Not bad- mabye you could have pointed out the obvious historical inaccuracies, but for the space allotted, it works nicely.
That ad they stuck in the center of your article is anoying as hell- I hate that shit almost as much as those scrolling ads that you have to click on to get rid of....
-------------------- Justice inclines her scales so that wisdom comes at the price of suffering. -Aeschylus, Agamemnon
Registered: Aug 2002
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-------------------- joH'a' 'oH wIj DevwI' jIH DIchDaq Hutlh pagh (some days it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps in the morning) The Woozle!
Registered: Nov 2002
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Cartman
just made by the Presbyterian Church
Member # 256
posted
"I'm not a big fat lair (...) I'm better than all of you in every way (...) I'd like some help"
posted
Well, at least he did not refer to you as "daddy".
That would have been conflict.
-------------------- Justice inclines her scales so that wisdom comes at the price of suffering. -Aeschylus, Agamemnon
Registered: Aug 2002
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posted
I really didn't have time to go into the historical inaccuracies. I had 450 words, which really isn't much at all. And to be honest, the historical inaccuracies don't have any bearing on the gameplay.
I could have stuck them in the box out (which isn't on the web-site), but I did something about the sea battles in there instead.
-------------------- Yes, you're despicable, and... and picable... and... and you're definitely, definitely despicable. How a person can get so despicable in one lifetime is beyond me. It isn't as though I haven't met a lot of people. Goodness knows it isn't that. It isn't just that... it isn't... it's... it's despicable.
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
Good call on the sea battles- they should have inserted the boxart insead of that distracting ad in your text body. Would've relly pulled the article together that way (from a graphic design POV).
-------------------- Justice inclines her scales so that wisdom comes at the price of suffering. -Aeschylus, Agamemnon
Registered: Aug 2002
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posted
It's not designed for the web, really. They're putting stuff up for free that's from the magazine, so I'm guessing that redesigning everything is a bit cost prohibitive. I'll try and find a scan of an actual print copy.
-------------------- Yes, you're despicable, and... and picable... and... and you're definitely, definitely despicable. How a person can get so despicable in one lifetime is beyond me. It isn't as though I haven't met a lot of people. Goodness knows it isn't that. It isn't just that... it isn't... it's... it's despicable.
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
I can't find a copy of that, but here's a scan of another one as it appears in the magazine, just so that you can get an idea of how the boxout thing works. The web-site one's are pretty much just copying and pasting the main text.
-------------------- Yes, you're despicable, and... and picable... and... and you're definitely, definitely despicable. How a person can get so despicable in one lifetime is beyond me. It isn't as though I haven't met a lot of people. Goodness knows it isn't that. It isn't just that... it isn't... it's... it's despicable.
Registered: Mar 1999
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![[Razz]](tongue.gif)
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