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Author Topic: Live... From California...it's......
Jubilee
...complete with cherries!
Member # 99

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10Q's!

Seems about time I posted one of these threads... This will be judged by the poster's responses, not the individual question response. Remember to be creative!!!

1. What will you give me for this food?
2. How is it possible to mistake a hamster for a powdered jelly donut?
3. What are the ingredients of Adobo?
4. Please give a reasonable way to resolve world conflict and restore peace to the world. You have 30 seconds.
5. Or would you rather be a fish?
6. Where can you find the Sacred Pastry? And what fillings do they come in? (blueberry doesn't count).
7. Why did I just ask that?
8. Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? You may not use a dictionary or chemistry book. Be creative.
9. Anyone know what's in "Sex on the Beach" ?
10. How do you convince your imaginary friends that they need to go away before they invite pets and breed?


Good Luck!!!!

------------------
"...when all that is driving my heart forward
is you, thoughts of you, hopes for you,
and a fading dream with a Mona Lisa smile
that whispers "are you thinking of me too?"

Dreams have become reality!!!!


Registered: Apr 1999  |  IP: Logged
Aethelwer
Frank G
Member # 36

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1. Not what certain others have...ahem.
2. Unfortunately, yes, as Ralph discovered. He looked so much like a glazed chocolate...
3. Ad, O, and Bo.
4. Simple, blow up the world! There will be nobody around to cause conflict or interfere with peace.
5. Yes! Except the kind that swims.
6. CC's local Safeway, and you can get them in cherry, pineapple, and motor oil.
7. Because you suddenly have a craving for motor oil.
8. Well, Hell keeps taking in souls, and presumably their associated heat, but I don't know if it's getting any hotter or what. Actually, I think Hell dropped as low as O degrees C on the day that Microsoft invested in Apple, so maybe it's endothermic. Of course, this doesn't account for Hinduism where souls are recycled but earth is supposed to be hell anyway etc. etc.
9. Yes, but this is a PG-rated forum. Wait, who am I kidding, no it isn't.
10. Well, if they're imaginary friends, you can get rid of them with a lobotomy.

------------------
Frank's Home Page
"Anarchias de meizon ouk estin kakon." - Creon


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
TSN
I'm... from Earth.
Member # 31

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1. What will you give me for this food?

For the last time, no. And put your clothes back on...

2. How is it possible to mistake a hamster for a powdered jelly donut?

Well, if you're blind, and the hamster doesn't move, and the doughnut is very very moldy...

3. What are the ingredients of Adobo?

Use the same things you would to make adobe, but, rather than 'e', double the quantity of 'o'.

4. Please give a reasonable way to resolve world conflict and restore peace to the world. You have 30 seconds.

Put me in charge and let me execute anybody I don't like.

5. Or would you rather be a fish?

A babelfish? I've always wanted to be multilingual...

6. Where can you find the Sacred Pastry? And what fillings do they come in? (blueberry doesn't count).

Mmm... Forbidden doughnut... Ahh...

7. Why did I just ask that?

Because you're silly.

8. Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? You may not use a dictionary or chemistry book. Be creative.

Well, it used to be exothermic, but, after the little announcement you and CC made, I'm not so sure anymore...

9. Anyone know what's in "Sex on the Beach" ?

Sand. In very uncomfortable, hard-to-clean places.

10. How do you convince your imaginary friends that they need to go away before they invite pets and breed?

Depends... Are they breeding with the pets...?

------------------
"General Hammond: Request permission to beat the crap out of this man."
-Colonel O'Neill, Stargate: SG-1: "Bane"

[This message has been edited by TSN (edited November 27, 1999).]


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Vacuum robot lady from Spaceballs
astronauts gotta get paid
Member # 239

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1. What will you give me for this food?
Dear Lord...do we have to be reminded of this yet again?
Anyway: My virgin...sheep! Yes, sheep. They're nice and fresh!

2. How is it possible to mistake a hamster for a powdered jelly donut?
Well, when you bite either of them, gooey purple stuff comes out. Simple mistake.

3. What are the ingredients of Adobo?
Cucumbers and Toothpaste

4. Please give a reasonable way to resolve world conflict and restore peace to the world. You have 30 seconds.
Well, Ms. America seems to be doing a damn fine job already.

5. Or would you rather be a fish?
I'm under strict authorization not to release that information, ma'am.

6. Where can you find the Sacred Pastry? And what fillings do they come in? (blueberry doesn't count).
Sacred Pastry comes from the same fine company that brought you those damn 'cripsy-creme' things. The flavours are 'God's Secret Recipe', 'Jesus-Berry' & 'Moses Sprinkle'.

7. Why did I just ask that?
Idiocy.

8. Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? You may not use a dictionary or chemistry book. Be creative.
Why can't I use a dictionary? If I did, how would you know I didn't? I could ask a friend whos' a chemist, and he could tell me. There are so many loopholes here, that I could find any number of ways to tell you the answer to your question. Exothermic. There you go. Now, how do you know I didn't consult anything?

9. Anyone know what's in "Sex on the Beach" ?
Pineapples

10. How do you convince your imaginary friends that they need to go away before they invite pets and breed?
Why do they need to leave? What good are mating pets without an audience?

[This message has been edited by Ultra Magnus (edited November 27, 1999).]


Registered: Oct 1999  |  IP: Logged
Saiyanman Benjita
...in 2012. This time, why not the worst?
Member # 122

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1. What will you give me for this food?
That depends. If it's Chinese food, then anything you want, if it's mushrooms, then I'll give you a smack in the head for forgetting that I'm alergic to mushrooms. How could you????? Forgetting I'm alergic to mushrooms!!!!!! You unthoughtful little B****. I'll kill you, I'll kill you........... Wow! Looks like I went a little overboard for a second. Better catch my breath.
2. How is it possible to mistake a hamster for a powdered jelly donut?
When it's one of those powdered jelly donuts from Pokemon that looks like a little white fuzzy ball with a black head. No, wait that's a Guinea Pig. Sorry.
3. What are the ingredients of Adobo?
A is for apricots
D is for Dog meat
O is for Ostrich eggs
B is for Brandy
O is for Oregami laced with LSD.
I think that the oregami laced with LSD is my favorite ingredient in it. The rest is crap unless you mix the apricots with the brandy and screw the dog meat and ostrich eggs. However Dog meat and Ostrich eggs sounds like an idea for a a new poem called "Ostrich eggs and Dog meat" the new sequel for Sam I am.
4. Please give a reasonable way to resolve world conflict and restore peace to the world. You have 30 seconds.
Drop the bomb. Those left will be so happy that they're alive that they won't care about anything else.
That only took 10 seconds, so I'll reinstate my petition for supreme ruler of the world. Vote for me in the next election for supreme ruler of the world and I'll promise not to drop the bomb in my previous statement.
5. Or would you rather be a fish?
I'd rather be a squirrel, cause the squirrel chick was really hot (for a squirrel chick). The fish had nothing but that bigger fish (was it a shark or something?) that was trying to eat him. However being a bird wasn't so bad, but I just couldn't stand Archamedes.
6. Where can you find the Sacred Pastry? And what fillings do they come in? (blueberry doesn't count).
Bess Eaton across from KFC on route 12. For 50 cents more, you can get a hazelnut lite and extra sweet to go with that. The best is Boston Kreme, but I like lemon, strawberry. If you go to Dunk's the best they have is that powdered donut with the icing filling that comes out of the top.
7. Why did I just ask that?
Because you're in California and you miss Bess Eaton and because I got you started on the Hazelnut L and XS craze. Now when I ask for that, I get French Vanilla, too much milk and Sweet and Low.
8. Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? You may not use a dictionary or chemistry book. Be creative.
Exothermic. It gives off heat like a house with the door left open. (Your mother always says "You're heating the great outdoors") So when you're freinds say "It's hot as hell", it's because the heat has migrated from the actual hell to where you're at now. So it might just really be hot as hell.
9. Anyone know what's in "Sex on the Beach" ?
I'm not sure, but that's my favourite drink. As for the actual sex on the beach, a colon filled with sand, kelp flavored bikinis, and jellyfish stings on the feet and legs.
10. How do you convince your imaginary friends that they need to go away before they invite pets and breed?
Step 1. Show them pictures of cats licking themselves.
Step 2. Breed in front of them, so they can get disgusted.
Step 3. Have Taco Bell take their name and resemblance and make it into a commercial (I really had an orange tiger cat named Nacho). They'll get mad, try to hire Johnnie Cochran and sue the pants off Taco Bell, lose, and live the rest of their lives in a New York slum like Stanten Island.
If all else fails: Step 4. Go crazy, get committed, got to the insane asylum where they pump you full of drugs and you'll be healed of that damn imaginary friend.

------------------
Is it defeat or victory that waits in the dark?

[This message has been edited by Saiyanman Benjita (edited November 27, 1999).]


Registered: Apr 1999  |  IP: Logged
Jeff Raven
Always Right
Member # 20

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1. What will you give me for this food?
Anything you want...and be creative!

2. How is it possible to mistake a hamster for a powdered jelly donut?
Well, they're both soft and cuddly, and gooey and smooshy when you eat em...except hamsters are a bit crunchy.

3. What are the ingredients of Adobo?
Well, all I could find was that is a Filipino dish, so I'm guessing you take one large Filipino and roast on a pan with some herbs and spices.

4. Please give a reasonable way to resolve world conflict and restore peace to the world. You have 30 seconds.
Reasonable way? I guess that leaves out sending all the beautiful women to my address wouldn't count. Then again, that might not work, either, but it is an idea!

5. Or would you rather be a fish?
Do you know any beautiful women that are attracted to fish? I don't either.

6. Where can you find the Sacred Pastry? And what fillings do they come in? (blueberry doesn't count).
The Sacred Pastery is kept safe and locked up at the Capps Shrine, where all can behold its greatness. I do believe that blueberry was its original filling, but it has been since filled with gold.

7. Why did I just ask that?
You asked that because you haven't thought of anything else to ask at the moment, but then, you will soon think to ask this:

8. Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? You may not use a dictionary or chemistry book. Be creative.
Well, being a chemistry major, I would have to say exothermic...well, it will become endothermic if I ever win the lottery...

9. Anyone know what's in "Sex on the Beach" ?
2oz. Vodka
2oz. Melon Liqueur (Midori)
1oz. Chambord
3oz. Pineapple Juice
3oz. Cranberry Juice

Mix all ingredients and serve on the rocks. After about 4 of these, mix thoroughly with one nubile and beautiful woman.

10. How do you convince your imaginary friends that they need to go away before they invite pets and breed?
I myself, have never been able to solve myself of this problem. *grabs head* TheY'RE EveryWhERE!!

------------------
"Goverment exists to serve, not to lead. We do not exist by its volition, it exists by ours. Bear that in mind when you insult your neighbors for refusing to bow before it." - Jeffrey Richman, UB student


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Xentrick
good to go
Member # 64

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1. What will you give me for this food?
this money

2. How is it possible to mistake a hamster for a powdered jelly donut?
Richard Gere: Hey, it could happen to any one!

3. What are the ingredients of Adobo?
Spam, Spam, and Spam. Mix well and serve

4. Please give a reasonable way to resolve world conflict and restore peace to the world. You have 30 seconds.
Arrange for space aliens to arrive, bringing us enlightenment, guidance, and a way to kill all the commies.

5. Or would you rather be a fish?
No (ever seen The Incredible Mister Limpet? It�s only trouble.)

6. Where can you find the Sacred Pastry? And what fillings do they come in? (blueberry doesn't count).
in the holy freezer section, near the blessed burritos

7. Why did I just ask that?
It had to be asked, and no one else had the gumption

8. Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? You may not use a dictionary or chemistry book. Be creative.
I�ve been to Detroit: it�s definitely exothermic

9. Anyone know what's in "Sex on the Beach" ?
don�t care, as long as it doesn�t involve crabs in any way

10. How do you convince your imaginary friends that they need to go away before they invite pets and breed?
call the imaginary cops


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Jeff Raven
Always Right
Member # 20

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Xentrick, the crabs usually show up after the "Sex on the Beach"

------------------
"Goverment exists to serve, not to lead. We do not exist by its volition, it exists by ours. Bear that in mind when you insult your neighbors for refusing to bow before it." - Jeffrey Richman, UB student


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Elim Garak
Plain and simple
Member # 14

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Really? Cranberry Juice?

------------------
Elim Garak: "Oh, it's just Garak. Plain, simple Garak. Now, good day to you, Doctor. I'm so glad to have made such an... interesting new friend today." (DS9: "Past Prologue")


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Elim Garak
Plain and simple
Member # 14

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1. What will you give me for this food?

A free lifetime membership to the Cranberry Juice Lovers fan club! Right now you're paying one New Zealand dollar per decade, although I haven't informed you...

2. How is it possible to mistake a hamster for a powdered jelly donut?

Well, at Dumpy's (Dunkin'... whatever) Donuts, they taste the same. Always wondered why they called it powdered jelly donut on rye?

3. What are the ingredients of Adobo?

No ingredients at all, actually!

It's quite simple. Darwin saved the Ancient Dodo Empire from extniction just before its collapse. While the dodos are all gone, their ancestors, a Dobo Empire, still run things from their secret evolutionary hide-away in the Galopogos.

4. Please give a reasonable way to resolve world conflict and restore peace to the world. You have 30 seconds.

All hail the holy Lester B. Pearson.

5. Or would you rather be a fish?

No, I think I'm fine being a platypus for now. Perhaps in my next incarnation, but thanks for the offer, Jubes.

6. Where can you find the Sacred Pastry? And what fillings do they come in? (blueberry doesn't count).

The Sacred Pastry is found in my brain. Charles must pay for each extraction starting with yesterday. I shall soon become rich.

They come in Frankly Cranberry, Tropica-Lee Pineapple, Ultra Strawberry, Orange B'Liz-ard, and Fabr-ulous Grape, but primarily Banana Jubilee.

7. Why did I just ask that?

I think I've finally caught onto the answer for this question!

The imaginary sheep told you to do it!

8. Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? You may not use a dictionary or chemistry book. Be creative.

Exothermic! And you thought Sol was bad this time of year!

9. Anyone know what's in "Sex on the Beach" ?

Jeff does. And there's a good, edible ingredient in it.

10. How do you convince your imaginary friends that they need to go away before they invite pets and breed?

Okay, I think you've had a little too much of the previous question. Go take a cold shower and come back. Although the possible breeding would explain why when I was counting the sheep last night, it was exponential...

------------------
Elim Garak: "Oh, it's just Garak. Plain, simple Garak. Now, good day to you, Doctor. I'm so glad to have made such an... interesting new friend today." (DS9: "Past Prologue")

[This message has been edited by Elim Garak (edited November 30, 1999).]


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Saltah'na
Chinese Canadian, or 75% Commie Bastard.
Member # 33

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1) Well, I could drop my pants for you.... but that guy is doing it for free: "My old pants they ain't what they used to be, ain't what they used to be, ain't what they used to be. My old pants........."

2) *mouth full* What hamster? What Jelly donut?

3) Main Entry: ado�bo
Pronunciation: &-'dO-bO, �-'[th]O-bO
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural -bos
Etymology: Spanish
Date: circa 1951
: a Philippine dish of fish or meat marinated in a sauce usually containing vinegar and garlic, browned in fat, and simmered in the marinade.

Okay, I admit. I cheated, I used the dictionary for this one..........

4) Ermmmm..... what, my thirty seconds are up ALREADY?

5) Naw, a Dolphin. Like my gf

6) In the Sacred Bakery. Duh!!!

7) Because you need to make a shopping list?

8) Definitely exothermic. That's giving off or creating heat. An example of something being endothermic is when our bodies start to burn in an exothermic environment (also known as Hell).

Okay, I admit, I cheated on this one too........

9) *listening to Bleeding Gums Larry* Oh wait, I thought you said "SAX on the beach......"

10) Too late, they're already here...... *grunts* Hey!!!! Stop Shoving.......

------------------
I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
First of Two
Better than you
Member # 16

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1. What will you give me for this food?

Trust me, I ain't got nothing you want. Just gimmiethe food, and Sheep-boy here won't get hurt.

2. How is it possible to mistake a hamster for a powdered jelly donut?

My dog eats both...

3. What are the ingredients of Adobo?

Oh, that's EASY! Adobe with Oregano.

4. Please give a reasonable way to resolve world conflict and restore peace to the world. You have 30 seconds.

First of Two for Global Dictator. 'Nuff said.

5. Or would you rather be a fish?

Nope, spent some time as a fish in the late 70's. I got prune hands.

6. Where can you find the Sacred Pastry? And what fillings do they come in?(blueberry doesn't count).

That's what that covered thing the Muslims keep circling around in Mecca REALLY is. It's filled with strawberry and coconut.

7. Why did I just ask that?

We're ALL mad here, Alice.

8. Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? You may not use a dictionary or chemistry book. Be creative.

As it turns out, Hell is Exothermic, thanks mostly in part to Heaven's close proximity to the Sun (since it is always in the sky there,) God, Jesus, and halos -- all confirmed sources of radiant energy. In fact, I recall a scientific paper which proved that Heaven must be hotter in hell, leading to a necessary heat transferrance between Hell and Heaven. Also remember the journalistic works which suggest Hell has a frozen center (Dante).

9. Anyone know what's in "Sex on the Beach" ?

Well, when I do it, it usually contains a great deal of sand, biting sand flies, and the occasional jellyfish which may drift up to a preoccupied coupler during high tide and sting him/her (depending who is supine at the moment) on the tuckus.

10. How do you convince your imaginary friends that they need to go away before they invite pets and breed?

My imaginary friend hates me. I slept with his imaginary girlfriend.

------------------
Calvin: "No efficiency, no accountability... I tell you, Hobbes, it's a lousy way to run a Universe." -- Bill Watterson


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Gepta001
Active Member
Member # 231

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1. What will you give me for this food?

2 cents

2. How is it possible to mistake a hamster for a powdered jelly donut?

if you are drunk mabey?

3. What are the ingredients of Adobo?

I don't ask, I just eat

4. Please give a reasonable way to resolve world conflict and restore peace to the world. You have 30 seconds.

forcefeed everyone pot brownies, everyone will then love one another

5. Or would you rather be a fish?

merman would be nifty

6. Where can you find the Sacred Pastry? And what fillings do they come in? (blueberry doesn't count).

at the nearest catholic church potluck

7. Why did I just ask that?

no clue

8. Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? You may not use a dictionary or chemistry book. Be creative.

endothermic of course

9. Anyone know what's in "Sex on the Beach" ?

some juice, and alcohol

10. How do you convince your imaginary friends that they need to go away before they invite pets and breed?

uh, you take your medicine

------------------
and I, I took the road less traveled by, and that has made all the diference.


Registered: Oct 1999  |  IP: Logged
Jubilee
...complete with cherries!
Member # 99

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Well, kids... I figured that I better judge this, just in case someone actually cared if they won or not.

This one was a toughie, there were a lot of really great individual answers, but in the end, there can be only..... well, only three. So, here we go:

1. Benjita takes the cake with his long and seamingly pointless answers to my questions. Just the sort of things i'm looking for. Have FUN with the questions! I also really love the obscure movie reference (I would have preferred being the bird, actually.... though being as beautiful as that lady squirell would be nice, too..... )

2. First of Two.... *LOL*. I'm not sure if I should vote for you, or Ben.... perhaps you guys can team up?
On second thought......... per'aps not.

3. TSN...I find you Hell joke very funny...... though I'm sure that when YOU get some, Hell really WILL Have frozen over. *ahem* And I won't bother telling you where to put the forbidden donut......

Welp, now I get to post 10 more... see you guys soon!

------------------
"SHOES!"


Registered: Apr 1999  |  IP: Logged
AndrewR
Resident Nut-cache
Member # 44

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1. What will you give me for this food?

A lunchbox
2. How is it possible to mistake a hamster for a powdered jelly donut?

When you remove your hand you still want to lick your fingers *grimace* - even I thought that was sick

3. What are the ingredients of Adobo?
1 part Adobe Photoshop, 2 parts Sheriff Flobo

4. Please give a reasonable way to resolve world conflict and restore
peace to the world. You have 30 seconds.

A race - around the world in eighty days - we'll meet in Leicester Square at noon tomorrow, the Queen herself will through the chequered flag... ;O)

5. Or would you rather be a fish?

Who is Or? - Odo's "cousin"?

6. Where can you find the Sacred Pastry? And what fillings do they come
in? (blueberry doesn't count).

in the Sacred Pastry shop... lime and dental floss, sprouts and snouts and plain - with cherries.

7. Why did I just ask that?
Who asked who in the what now?

8. Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? You may not use a dictionary or
chemistry book. Be creative.

Well I don't think Hellen would like you talking about her in that way...

9. Anyone know what's in "Sex on the Beach" ?
Lots of sand and lots of pain...

10. How do you convince your imaginary friends that they need to go
away before they invite pets and breed?

My imaginary friend says there is no such thing as imaginary friends...

Tanru errr Landru errrr Andrew!
thankyouverymuch.

Andrew

------------------
"All the lonely people, where do they all come from" - Eleanor Rigby, The Beatles.


[This message has been edited by AndrewR (edited January 03, 2000).]


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
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