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My girlfriend might be leaving me.
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[QUOTE]Originally posted by EdipisReks: [QB] yesterday, my girlfriend of 3 years (who i had thought i would be spending the rest of my life with) told me that there was someone that she had had feelings for for a long time. my girlfriend told me that while she loved me with her whole heart, that she needed to see if this other person was in fact the one for her. i guess that 3 years of comitment and love isn't enough to convince her that i am the "one" for her, despite the fact that she has told me an innumberable amount of times that she wanted to be with me for the rest of her life. she also said that we were so young to be pairing off for life (i'm 21 and she is 20), but that she was also terrified of losing me in her life. this statement came as quite a shock to me since she had been saying for years that she didn't think that age matters and that people can find the "one" early in their life. what upsets me the most, is the fact that she has sort of been lying to me. the guy that she wants to "test out" is someone who she knew from high school. she talks to him for hours on AIM, and i have asked her several times point blank whether she had any feelings for him. she always assured me that she didn't, but the whole thing always seemed suspicious to me. obviously, finding out that this person might be the one who steals away the woman i love is quite distressing to me. erin (that's my girlfriend), says that she still loves me as much as ever, but that she needs to reacess her relationships. apparently, if she finds this person to be unsatisfactory she will return to me. i have no idea in hell how long it is going to take her to determine this, and i don't know if i would even want her back if she did want to return. to me, being told that basically the love she had and still has for me might be inferior to someone else, even if it is not, totally breaks the comitment that we have had. i have a hard time understanding all of this since i have been totally devoted to her. i don't even dream of have fantasies about other women (not even idealized female forms in sexual fantazies), which i have learned is rather uncommon in monogamous relationships. i love erin far more than i could ever put into words, but i don't know if i could be with someone who questions the very basic building blocks of our relationship. i also don't understant why someone would risk losing a sure, deep love for something that might not even be real. to me, it's like trading in a ferarri F-50 for a car sized box that might have a yugo, but might also have a mclaren f1. maybe the mclaren is a better car in some ways, but even if you trade for it you still lose everything that you enjoyed about the ferrari. obviously if you get the yugo you are screwed. i just don't know what to do. all my plans for the next several years (i was going to start doing research about what graduate school programs have both good music school, she is a clarinet performance major, and good history departments) are shot, and i am at a total loss as to what to do. i know that i don't understand women, but i thought i understood erin. thank you for reading, i really needed to get this off my chest, and all of my close friends are out of town on a school trip. --jacob [/QB][/QUOTE]
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