What Nationality was Jesus?
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THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS JEWISH
He went into his father's business
He lived at home until he was 33
He was sure his Mother was a virgin, and his Mother was sure he was God

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS IRISH
He never got married
He was always telling stories
He loved green pastures

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS PUERTO RICAN
His first name was Jesus
He was bilingual
He was always being harassed by the authorities

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS ITALIAN
He talked with his hands
He had wine with every meal
He worked in the building trades

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS BLACK
He called everybody "brother"
He liked Gospel
He couldn't get a fair trial

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS A CALIFORNIAN
He never cut his hair
He walked around barefoot
He started a new religion

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS A WOMAN
He had to feed a crowd, at a moments notice, when there was no food
He kept trying to get the message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it
Even dead, he had to get up because there was more work for him to do.

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Philosophy Exam
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A college student in a philosophy class was taking his first examination.

On the paper there was a single line which simply said:
"Is this a question?" - Discuss.

After a short time he wrote:
"If that is a question, then this is an answer."

The student received an "A" on the exam.

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Modern Discipline
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"When I was a youngster," complained the frustrated father, "I was disciplined by being sent to my room without supper. But my son has his own colour TV, phone, computer and CD player.

"So what do you do?" asked his friend.

"I send him to MY room!"
 

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"One Tequila, Two Tequila, Three Tequila, Floor". George Carlin