Target: The Clintons
A Kentucky Fried Chicken location in New York had a special on what they were calling the Bucket of Hillary - two small breasts, two large thighs and a bunch of left wings.
One of the nation's largest soup manufacturers announced today that they will be stocking America's shelves this week with their newest Soup creation, Clinton Soup, that will honor one of the nation's most distinguished men. It consists primarily of a small weenie in hot water.
Chrysler Corporation is adding a new car to its line to honor Bill Clinton. The Dodge Drafter will begin production in Canada this year.
When Clinton was asked what he thought about foreign affairs, he replied: I don't know, I never had one.
If you came across Bill Clinton struggling in a raging river and you had a choice between rescuing him or getting a Pulitzer Prize-winning photograph, what shutter speed would you use?
Chelsea asked her dad, Do all fairy tales begin with once upon a time? Bill Clinton replied, No, some begin with 'After I'm elected'.
Clinton's mother prayed fervently that Bill would grow up and be president. So far, half of her prayer has been answered.
American Indians have nicknamed Bill Clinton as "Walking Eagle" because he is so full of crap he can't fly.
Clinton only lacks three things to become one of America's finest leaders: integrity, vision, and wisdom.
Clinton is doing the work of three men: Larry, Curly, and Moe.
Revised judicial oath: "I solemnly swear to tell the truth as I know it, the whole truth as I believe it to be, and nothing but what I think you need to know."
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Intelligence, Integrity, Responsibility.
Vote Bush/Cheney 2000
quote:
Intelligence, Integrity, Responsibility.
Vote Bush/Cheney 2000
Ay *ahem* I second that. LOL what about the one with the chicken or the hog in the middle of the road. Oh, now I remember ... it goes something like this:
Bill Clinton and his driver were driving down a country road in Arkansas one night when the car accidently hit a pig. Feeling it was his responsibility, the driver got out of the car and decided to tell the farmer accross the road.
When the farmer answered the door, the driver said:
"I'm Bill Clinton's driver and the pig is dead."
Well, at hearing this the farmer went into a fit of ectasy. The farmer went back into his house exclaiming "the pig is dead!" Before the driver knew what was happening, he shoved gifts into his hands. Offered his daughter in marriage ...
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-Small Computer Systems Interface "Scuzzy" Emperor
Operator of the Goulag Hotel, maintainer of the workhouses.
Operator of Cargill Conglomerate Publications, http://www.cargillconglomerate.com
A scene that was cut from last season's "Rock" episode, Tsumkatse:
Rock: Do ya smell what the Rock's cookin'?
Janeway: Mr. Rock, was that you?
Tuvok: An intriguing smell ...
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"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it."
- George Bernard Shaw
And let me tell you, that's an awful lot of poo.
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"Why do you want to spend time with a deer? They're so stupid, they get hypnotized by headlights!" - Guido Anchovy
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Intelligence, Integrity, Responsibility.
Vote Bush/Cheney 2000
I can't wait until this whole election shit is over... It's damned annoying. You don't hear half as much crap over the prime minister election. Which should be coming up soon...
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"The kingdom of God is inside you, and all around you; not in a building of stone or wood. Split a piece of wood, and I will be there. Lift a stone, and you will find me."
-The Gospel of Jesus, Stigmata
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Oh, fiddle faddle, everyone knows that our mutants have flippers. Oops, I've said too much.....
~C. Montgomery Burns
[This message has been edited by Jay (edited August 13, 2000).]
"What, again?! This stupid country."
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Come on darkness
Lay your body down on us
We've been calling you for so long now
We're weary of your name
--
Camper Van Beethoven
****
Read chapter one of "Dirk Tungsten in...The Disappearing Planet"! Pull your body for a moment from your soul.
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"Me, Grimlock, not 'nice dino'! Me, Grimlock, bash brains!"
-Grimlock, Transformers: The Movie
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"The things hollow--it goes on forever--and--oh my God!--it's full of stars!" -David Bowman's last transmission back to Earth, 2001: A Space Odyssey
quote:
3. Stop enforcing state and federal personal income tax. The whole federal personal income (and payroll)
tax is well known to be illegal; so are the state taxes dependent on the federal compulsory informant
system.4. No member of the "bar" should be a judge. Abolish the "bar". In all professions, replace required
licensure with recommended certification.5. Have real elections, with ballots manually counted in public view on site. Abolish all "campaign finance
laws".6. Only taxpaying men may vote or hold office. The 19th Amendment exceeds federal authority.
7. Fathers have custody of the children. Abolish divorce property settlements and ex-wife support (lyingly
called "child support"); these are bills of attainder.8, Let the people have purer water. A government epidemiologist found that fluoridation is causing
infertility, and published his finding in a peer-reviewed medical journal.
11. Segregate the prisons. White men should not be raped by black men. See Missouri Constitution, Article
1, Section 21 and U. S. Constitution, Amendment Article 8.
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"...I was just up in Canada, Toronto actually. You know, they really hate you guys [Americans] up there? The funny thing is, they think you hate them back, when in fact, you just couldn't be bothered to care. Now in Ireland, it's a different story. At least we had the common decency to wait until the English invaded before we started hating them. I guess the Canadians are hating you in advance..."
-Irish Comic Ed Byrne on Canada-US relations
quote:
Only taxpaying men may vote or hold office. The 19th Amendment exceeds federal authority.
A loon,? He's a dern neanderthal.
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Oh, fiddle faddle, everyone knows that our mutants have flippers. Oops, I've said too much.....
~C. Montgomery Burns
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"Me, Grimlock, not 'nice dino'! Me, Grimlock, bash brains!"
-Grimlock, Transformers: The Movie
quote:
6. Only taxpaying men may vote or hold office. The 19th Amendment exceeds federal authority.
I agree with that. Ending women's suffrage has been a big issue for me. If women weren't able to vote, Clinton would have never gotten into office. And that's reason enough.
Everything else is a little to right-wing extremist for me. But I've seen worse.
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-Small Computer Systems Interface "Scuzzy" Emperor
Operator of the Goulag Hotel, maintainer of the workhouses.
Operator of Cargill Conglomerate Publications, http://www.cargillconglomerate.com
A scene that was cut from last season's "Rock" episode, Tsumkatse:
Rock: Do ya smell what the Rock's cookin'?
Janeway: Mr. Rock, was that you?
Tuvok: An intriguing smell ...
[This message has been edited by SCSImperium (edited August 13, 2000).]
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"Me, Grimlock, not 'nice dino'! Me, Grimlock, bash brains!"
-Grimlock, Transformers: The Movie
quote:
3. Stop enforcing state and federal personal income tax. The whole federal personal income (and payroll) tax is well known to be illegal; so are the state taxes dependent on the federal compulsory informant system.
quote:
6. Only taxpaying men may vote or hold office. The 19th Amendment exceeds federal authority.
If you don't pay taxes, how then can you vote?
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"What happens if a big asteroid hits the Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad."
- Dave Barry
[This message has been edited by Ultra Magnus (edited August 13, 2000).]
"I agree with that. Ending women's suffrage has been a big issue for me. If women weren't able to vote, Clinton would have never gotten into office. And that's reason enough.
Everything else is a little to right-wing extremist for me. But I've seen worse."
So you claim you're not an extremist? I beg to differ.
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"My Name is Elmer Fudd, Millionaire. I own a Mansion and a Yacht."
Psychiatrist: "Again."
[This message has been edited by Tahna Los (edited August 13, 2000).]
quote:
So you claim you're not an extremist? I beg to differ.
I doubt you could classify me any one way. On some issues I'm an extreme liberal (absolute freedom of speech, foreign policy, government program funding, increasing taxes for government spending, supporting wlefare programs, etc.) then on others convervative (animal civil rights, various economic policies, dress).
And no, I'm not male shovenist [sp] either. I don't support locking women up in closets like the Missouri cannidate, just suspending rights from citizens who abuse them. Voting Bill Clinton into office in 1992, then again in 1996 is a crime. And the statistics show that a huge number of men voted for Bush and Dole, yet the majority party of women casted in their favor to Clinton. And why? *Oh, I like his hair* {shudder}
Send NOW after me if you wish ...
You know that word sexism was only invented three decades ago ... my words, in fact, stand the test of time better. Augustus even agreed that a woman voting would be too scandalous, even though women in Rome could own land and paid taxes. Just call me old fashioned .... on one issue.
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-Small Computer Systems Interface "Scuzzy" Emperor
Operator of the Goulag Hotel, maintainer of the workhouses.
Operator of Cargill Conglomerate Publications, http://www.cargillconglomerate.com
A scene that was cut from last season's "Rock" episode, Tsumkatse:
Rock: Do ya smell what the Rock's cookin'?
Janeway: Mr. Rock, was that you?
Tuvok: An intriguing smell ...
[This message has been edited by SCSImperium (edited August 13, 2000).]
quote:
Voting Bill Clinton into office in 1992, then again in 1996 is a crime
Prove that it broke the law. Prove it was illegal. It may not have been the best idea, but hey, there's democracy for you.
It's too bad that everybody didn't think like you, isn't it? If we did, the nuthouses would be filled up to capacity.
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"What happens if a big asteroid hits the Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad."
- Dave Barry
quote:
the nuthouses would be filled up to capacity.
There's another topic; it's become harder to commit people in recent years, so no actually. That's why you see so many panhandlers on the streets these days ...
Oh, come now. I used the word to get your attention, since eveyone seems to be against me. I used the word Illegal not by the literal standard of a written document, but in the eyes of the people who authored the constitution. Maybe illegal is the wrong term, more "reckless" is. But, then on my contrary, the presidential position is becoming less and less important as our economy stablizes.
Actually, if you wish to continue the conversation, I have the support of several women on ending their own suffrage. Bryn Mawr graduates, even.
quote:
You're a moron.
And just because I make a statement outside the political correctness of today? Well, yes, but what about yesterday? Do not their views, which I hold in consideration, count anymore?
That's shortsightedness, my friend. Especially when you think about tomorrow. How do you know that the whole Women's Right thing wont fall into disfavor in another 10, 20 years? Their issues will begin to become overshadowed, and suddenly there'll be a new taboo. Consider the views of women for two, three thousand years in comparison to 30 years? Then rethink your statements.
I do not wish to compete in a flame war.
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-Small Computer Systems Interface "Scuzzy" Emperor
Operator of the Goulag Hotel, maintainer of the workhouses.
Operator of Cargill Conglomerate Publications, http://www.cargillconglomerate.com
A scene that was cut from last season's "Rock" episode, Tsumkatse:
Rock: Do ya smell what the Rock's cookin'?
Janeway: Mr. Rock, was that you?
Tuvok: An intriguing smell ...
[This message has been edited by SCSImperium (edited August 13, 2000).]
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"The things hollow--it goes on forever--and--oh my God!--it's full of stars!" -David Bowman's last transmission back to Earth, 2001: A Space Odyssey
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"What happens if a big asteroid hits the Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad."
- Dave Barry
"I doubt you could classify me any one way. On some issues I'm an extreme liberal (absolute freedom of speech, foreign policy, government program funding, increasing taxes for government spending, supporting wlefare programs, etc.)"
May I remind you that Absolute Freedom of speech INCLUDES women's voting rights. And those of Black, Gays, Lesbians, Disabled people, etc. Keyword Equality. Everyone in society has EQUAL RIGHTS. That's called Democracy. Right now, I have trouble believing that you actually support it.
And may I remind you that Women are like all men: intelligent HUMAN BEINGS.
Someone move this to the flameboard.
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"My Name is Elmer Fudd, Millionaire. I own a Mansion and a Yacht."
Psychiatrist: "Again."
[This message has been edited by Tahna Los (edited August 13, 2000).]
And yes, it may be the fault of the "soccer moms" that der schlikmeister is in office, but they still have the right to vote, as rational, responsable beings.
And animal rights is a liberal issue. It gives the government more power.
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"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it."
- George Bernard Shaw
The Constitution is the highest law of the land and amendments made to it care the same weight. So if Crazy "My Wife Divorced Me And Took My Gun, Dog And Money" Mizou fellow wants to try and pass another amendment to the Constitution repealing the 19th, then welcome. There are many, other than soccer moms who will fight him tooth and nail.
There are other amendments that require intrepretation but not the 19th.
quote:
The right of citizens of the United States to vote shall not be denied or abridged by the United States or by any State on account of sex.
Man, that's simple and too the point.
As to the issue of who voted for whom in the last two elections, well I don't know that there is any substantial proof, other than looking at the records of the election, as to if the female vote:
As to the general intelligence of the population as a whole, well I can't speak to that save only to say that if the populace of the US were brighter than it is, we would have a better choice at the polls than Gore or Dubya Bush.
However, universal sufferage allows politics of the lowest common denominator. The elections are a media circus with bright lights and glowing speeches for the masses who could care less about a real issues.
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Oh, fiddle faddle, everyone knows that our mutants have flippers. Oops, I've said too much.....
~C. Montgomery Burns
[This message has been edited by Jay (edited August 14, 2000).]
quote:
May I remind you that Absolute Freedom of speech INCLUDES women's voting rights.
Not really. Related, but not the same. Speech and Suffrage are two different things. As freedom of speech has existed for many years, among all parties, not only in America but in other cultures, truly universal suffrage has not. More being a recent twentieth century invention.
quote:
And may I remind you that Women are like all men: intelligent HUMAN BEINGS.
I never asserted the contrary. If the physical voting records showed caucasian males had voted Clinton into office as a majority, I'd be in feminist group by now. That's how much I dislike our president. So much as draw myself into an argument you'll never open your eyes too.
Also, I don't see how you're drawing all these parties into the matter. You figure since I oppose one aspect of a certain group that that automatically means I'm the all rounded bigot of everyone. Fallacious logic. In fact, as a seperate issue to discuss some time, the Native American population is widely abused and exploited in this country. I've written many articles denouncing government Indian reservations (like segregated communities) ...
But that's off the topic. Yes, I do agree that it would be unfair to the woman population to universally ban them from the polls. Whatever that needs to be ruled out to encourage more traditional cannidates. Of course, I say this all in theory, and I would never try to applicate it like our friend in Missouri.
I consider the matter ended. There's no need for a flame war. I respect all your opinions, as well as your arguments, as I wish you would see mine.
I think Jay said it better than me. The more you limit a election to certain parties, the better the outcome is in the end result. In fact, in countries where the political situation is much more serious, and the welfare of the country depends on a leader, there are systems to prevent a popular vote (i.e. a Parliamentry system, where a people chosen congress chooses the leader, acting like a double filter).
quote:
No wonder that girl at your school didn't want anything to do with you.
Well, not because of these reasons. More like because I don't belong to a cult. Frankly, if I asked her if she supported ending woman's suffrage, she'd say "Yes, I think we should end woman's suffering."
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-Small Computer Systems Interface "Scuzzy" Emperor
Operator of the Goulag Hotel, maintainer of the workhouses.
Operator of Cargill Conglomerate Publications, http://www.cargillconglomerate.com
A scene that was cut from last season's "Rock" episode, Tsumkatse:
Rock: Do ya smell what the Rock's cookin'?
Janeway: Mr. Rock, was that you?
Tuvok: An intriguing smell ...
[This message has been edited by SCSImperium (edited August 14, 2000).]
I don't agree with you (duh), but I can see why you hold that opinion. Let me get this straight here: you oppose women's suffrage because 1)You don't like Bill and 2)Many women voted for him (Just what ARE the statistics, anyway?). Don't give me the "oh, I like his hair" bullshit. Number one, you're jumping to conclusions based on your hatred of Clinton. Number two, that "reasoning" is comes from prejudice and extremely broad generalization. People don't always think the way you do. GET OVER IT.
Goddess, you've said it yourself. It's Clinton you hate, not women. You get a bad president, so you blame the voters. Sound logic, indeed.
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"Poetic souls delight in prose insane."
--Lord Byron
Anyway, does it really matter who's president? The position has been pretty much relegated to the status of "figurehead" anyway. Not quite, but close...
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"Me, Grimlock, not 'nice dino'! Me, Grimlock, bash brains!"
-Grimlock, Transformers: The Movie
1) This is fast running into flameboard territory. *looks pleadingly at admins* Can I have it? Can I have it? Puhleeze?
2) I shudder to think what kind of president Mr. Cigarettes-are-as-addicitive-as-milk would have been.
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"...I was just up in Canada, Toronto actually. You know, they really hate you guys [Americans] up there? The funny thing is, they think you hate them back, when in fact, you just couldn't be bothered to care. Now in Ireland, it's a different story. At least we had the common decency to wait until the English invaded before we started hating them. I guess the Canadians are hating you in advance..."
-Irish Comic Ed Byrne on Canada-US relations
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"Homer, you're dumb as a mule and twice as ugly,
if a strange man offers you a ride, I say take it"-Abe S.
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"Antagonist Class Badly-Armored Poorly-Equipped Crappy-Fire Support Tug. To search out new armor and batteries. Because, well, we don't have a warp-core. That is my flagship, BTW." - Antag