Hmmm, I just noticed we had three members at the board... and 71 guests!! Is that right!?!
Posted by Siegfried (Member # 29) on :
Keep in mind that any members who opted out of having their names shown at the bottom of the forum summary will be listed as a guest.
Posted by Charles Capps (Member # 9) on :
3/4 of all guests are search bots.
Posted by Jason Abbadon (Member # 882) on :
Andrew is a robot....I'm almost certain.
I was the only FLarite online the other night. I did awful things to your lockers while you were away.
Posted by Nim' (Member # 205) on :
*checks locker contents* GASP! What kind of a man would desecrate a defenseless textbook?! I've got a good mind to slap your fat fayce!
Posted by Jason Abbadon (Member # 882) on :
It was the part of your science book pertaining to evolution. The Creationists made me do it: they have photos of me.
Bad photos.
Posted by Siegfried (Member # 29) on :
Serves you right for doing unholy things in the pumpkin patch outside the Wal-Mart.
Posted by Nim' (Member # 205) on :
For that little outburst I'm going to reward each of you with three hours detention, today, immediately after school, in the basement!
Posted by Siegfried (Member # 29) on :
Ooh, ooh! Mr. Nim! Can I be put in chains and handcuffs, too, please, sir?
Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
Only if you agreed to be thrashed with a ripe pineapple dipped in maple syrup!
I'll robot you Jason!! Shut your fanhole! Posted by Nim' (Member # 205) on :
Re: Topic: Weird
Last week I checked the website for Sweden's largest movie distributor, SF. In the news-section there was a note about "Palindromes" coming up soon. I checked it out on IMDB, then checked director Todd Solonz's other movies to get a grip on him, I started reading a review of "Happiness" where it was compared to "Requiem for a dream" in terms of grittiness and gumption.
After reading reviews of "Requiem..." and seeing nice screencaps of Uncle Hank (ass-to-ass, N.B), I finally got fed up by the brewing Kafka-atmosphere and instead started watching a Monty Python episode I'd downloaded.
In the middle of it was the Librarian-scene, where some librarians interview a gorilla applying for work. Terry Jones asks if the gorilla would hesitate to take in the books "Groupie" or "Last exit to Brooklyn" if he were in charge.
Always eager for obscure reading tips I checked out these titles, which must've been the talk of the town in 1969 if they were mentioned by Python. Well guess who I found wrote "Last exit to Brooklyn"?
Hubert Selby, author of "Requiem for a dream".
So now the circle is complete and I got kicked out from Samsara and dumped in Nirvana; I'm now floating around buck naked in some sort of void, unsure of what to do. There are some black rectangles here too, wtf? I haven't even spawned offspring yet, I had loads of crap I was gonna do before transcending my existence. Thanks a lot, internet! Posted by Jason Abbadon (Member # 882) on :
Whenever I find myself trancendant, I think of how good oral sex, driving fast and being mean to jerks is....
That knocks me down a few levels of enlightenment.
P.S.- The black rectangles are just placeholders untill better special effects can be added in later.
Posted by Lee (Member # 393) on :
Overhead, without any fuss, the stars were going out.
Posted by Jason Abbadon (Member # 882) on :
Sorry. That happens sometimes when I wax philosophical.
Posted by Balaam Xumucane (Member # 419) on :
Is that what they're calling it these days? Careful, you'll go blind.
Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
Giving or receiving Jason? Posted by Nim' (Member # 205) on :
Yes, we're giving and receiving Jasons, that's pretty much all we do here. Next question.
Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
NEXT QUESTION!?! OK, how many cloudberries can you fit in your mouth? Posted by Nim' (Member # 205) on :
Oh AndrewR, I don't remember the taste of cloudberries. But if I did, are we talking european cloudberries or african cloudberries here?
Posted by Lee (Member # 393) on :
"The memory of cloudberries" - such a poetic phrase.
Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
Bugger, what were those berries you were all talking about a while back? Were they cloudberries?
Posted by Nim' (Member # 205) on :
Now that's a question for the ages. Some say they were indeed cloudberries. Other renditions of this historic event put the berries as of the rasp-kind (due to similarity in shape, if not in hue) and the source of the discussion to dock-working seamen, not web bumpkins, as the oldest chronicles of the event had it.
The most popular interpretation, albeit fanciful and self-serving, is that these jam-prone and vitamin-rich fruits were in this case talked of by a small group of travelling book-keepers, notorious for their attention to detail and fervor of getting into debates of all kinds.
As time passes, the chance of ever finding out the real truth behind what went on regarding those "berries" some time back in the early 21st century grows ever slimmer, though it keeps on inspiring thousands each passing moon.
Go to sleep now, child, we have a long day ahead of us tomorrow, those thetans aren't going to steambath themselves out of our bodies.
Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
Perfect.
Posted by Cartman (Member # 256) on :
Someone should archive these, and publish them as The Book of Nimisms. It would sell.
Posted by Lee (Member # 393) on :
In Norway, anyway.
Posted by Jason Abbadon (Member # 882) on :
Or (possibly) to Nim's family.
.....today, I can only move like C3PO. Yesterday I moved all my worldly posessions down a flight of stairs, into a truck and then (after driving acouple of miles) from the truck, into my new apartment.
So....sore...oilcan...
On the positive side, I now have a dedicated artroom.
And new couches....very cushy ones at at that.
Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
I had a dream last night that I found a jar of cloudberry jam.
Posted by Jason Abbadon (Member # 882) on :
DOnt be embarassed: those dreams are a sign you're becoming a man.
Posted by Nim' (Member # 205) on :
Well it's an uneven ground, these first steps. It depends on how he acts upon it, Jason.
- How large was the jar, Andrew? Did it come with a miniature spoon, or a festive ribbon? I'm taking a lot of risks here but this could be the sign we've been waiting for.
Jason:
quote:On the positive side, I now have a dedicated artroom.
So you're finally going to make that dream come true, singing through the whole song "one thousand bottles of beer on the wall".
Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
quote:Originally posted by Nim': Well it's an uneven ground, these first steps. It depends on how he acts upon it, Jason.
- How large was the jar, Andrew? Did it come with a miniature spoon, or a festive ribbon? I'm taking a lot of risks here but this could be the sign we've been waiting for.
LOL I fear to answer these questions on the basis that you are going to roast me.
No spoon or ribbon.
Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
I had a dream last night that I had to go this combination airport waiting lounge/long-term baggage storage place to get my suitcase, and it was full of Iraqis, only I didn't know if they were leaving Iraq or going back. My suitcase was mostly empty except for a single pair of jeans and a shirt, which I took out, as well as a CD player and headphones, and a camera + extra roll of film.
Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
That is, just to clarify, the lounge was full of Iraqis, not my suitcase.
Latter on I dreamt that my father woke me up, standing worryingly close to my bed; he was completely in shadow, and for some reason I felt that he was, in fact, John Rhys-Davies, even though I knew he was not. Then I woke up and it was 3:30 in the morning, and I have been awake since then.
Posted by Lee (Member # 393) on :
I keep telling him he needs to get laid, but he always changes the subject and talks about philosophy, or something like that.
Posted by Cartman (Member # 256) on :
Well, I suppose dreaming about lounges full of Iraqis every night would push you in that direction.
Posted by Jason Abbadon (Member # 882) on :
Using the words "iraquis" and "airport" in the same post has probably been noted by Der Homeland Sekurity Dept.
TOday I installed blinds on the windows of my new apartment: ir was a bit too exposed before: I woke up thursday night and went into the kitchen for water when I realised that I was nude and the exposed windows face the parking lot (I'm on the ground level).
Luckily it was the middle of the night and I'd kept the lights out.
Kinda voyueristic though.
Hopefully I'll get a chance to assemble my computer tomorrow.
Posted by Siegfried (Member # 29) on :
I replaced a showerhead this morning. My life is as interesting as a thousand dying goldfish.
Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
Yes the Echelon Network will pick up your talk of Iraqi's and Airports.
Posted by Marauth (Member # 1320) on :
So if one of us types "I('m) (involved in/know of) a terrorist attack" will they'll come and pack us into cattle-trucks and send us off to deepest Siberia finally releasing our descendants decades later who'll find their homelands population by Russian colonists?
That'd be highly amusing for others to watch I'm sure.
quote:standing worryingly close to my bed; he was completely in shadow, and for some reason I felt that he was, in fact, John Rhys-Davies
- Sol - Maybe Der Homeland Security Dept. are inserting nightmarish images into your dreams as punishment for thinking about Iraqis.
Posted by Nim' (Member # 205) on :
Andrew:
quote:I fear to answer these questions on the basis that you are going to roast me.
Ghak! I would never use another's personal information against them. As nip prefect, I'm sworn to professional secrecy.
quote:No spoon or ribbon.
Well see this is interesting, they normally outfit themselves in that fashion to look presentable and cordial to the human they're visisting. If the jar didn't have any accessories, that means the situation forced it to do an emergency fold to reach you, leaving no time for niceties. ... This doesn't add up. Cloudberry jams pride themselves in their toughness and resolve, what could possibly scare one of them enough to leave the ribbon and spoon back at the base? I fear something big is going to happen in Australia.
Sol:
quote: My suitcase was mostly empty except for a single pair of jeans and a shirt, which I took out, as well as a CD player and headphones, and a camera + extra roll of film.
That sounds like the strategy my brother used for Thailand last summer. He didn't bring any clothes except for what he was wearing, he just bought whatever he needed down there. Maybe you need to take a break, get some new experiences. I really need to get a break from Sweden, what with the fucking sleet and all. I may be projecting.
Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
quote:Originally posted by Nim': Andrew:
quote:I fear to answer these questions on the basis that you are going to roast me.
Ghak! I would never use another's personal information against them. As nip prefect, I'm sworn to professional secrecy.
Nip? as in Nipple?
quote:Originally posted by Nim':
quote:No spoon or ribbon.
Well see this is interesting, they normally outfit themselves in that fashion to look presentable and cordial to the human they're visisting. If the jar didn't have any accessories, that means the situation forced it to do an emergency fold to reach you, leaving no time for niceties. [/QB]
Ahhh but it's lid was covered in one of those red and white gigham material covers. ...
quote:Originally posted by Nim':
I fear something big is going to happen in Australia.
[/QB]
"big"?
Yeah, me baybee! Woo! Posted by Jason Abbadon (Member # 882) on :
"Big" as in Steve Irwin being elected your Prime Minister.
Posted by Balaam Xumucane (Member # 419) on :
"Oi, these American diplomats can be really feisty. Very dangerous. Their venom has been known to topple small governments. Crikey, look at the briefcase on this one! I'll dogleg around behind 'im while Terry gets the needle ready."
Posted by Jason Abbadon (Member # 882) on :
So Irwin would dangle his baby in front of a dangerous Republican?
Viewers would cheer for the US diplomat (particularly if it meant bodily injury to Steve Irwin)....even the french!
Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :
American's made him popular... he was unknown here until he became big in the US.
Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
1.) I would really like to go to Scandinavia, as it turns out.
2.)
quote:Using the words "iraquis" and "airport" in the same post has probably been noted by Der Homeland Sekurity Dept.
In which case I guess I dodged a bullet.
3.) was going to be a link to a story about how the government finally ditched Carnivore after it became apparent that, as designed, it was totally unworkable, but then I realized I was getting my shadowy intelligence ops confused.
Posted by Cartman (Member # 256) on :
Oh, not so much "unworkable" as "redundant".
Posted by Nim' (Member # 205) on :
Sol: Well pip pip and cheerio, sounds like we're getting a gentleman caller. - Old crone, fetch me my spats n' suspenders and you might yet see another dawn.
Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
Let's not go making plans just yet. The places I want to go far outnumber the places I've actually been.
Posted by Nim' (Member # 205) on :
It befitted the moment. Anyways, what you're describing goes for most people. Some places have gotten cheaper to go to, others much more expensive. I'm hoping to do the orient-express or the trans-siberian line, without having to sell my kidneys.
Posted by Lee (Member # 393) on :
*harvests Nim with his eyes*
Posted by Toadkiller (Member # 425) on :
They can do eye transplants now - cool.
I've been to one end of the trans-Siberian railway. Nice place to have dinner, but be careful of the fat guy in the little rubber boat.
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