The new element has no protons or electrons, thus having an atomic number of 0. It does, however, have one neutron, 125 assistant neutrons, 75 vice neutrons, and 111 assistant vice neutrons, for an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by a force
called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.
Since it has no electrons, Administratium is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every other reaction with which it comes into contact. According to the discoverers, a minute amount of Administratium can cause a reaction that would normally take less than
a second to take over four days to complete.
Administratium has a normal half-life of approximately three years. It does not actually decay, but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons, vice neutrons, and assistant vice neutrons exchange places.
In fact, an Administratium sample's mass will actually increase over time, since with each reorganization some of the morons inevitably become neutrons, forming new isotopes. This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Administratium is formed whenever morons reach a certain concentration within the medium. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as the "Critical Morass".
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If a diamond is a woman's best friend, why does a man has to settle for a dog?
- Thomas Tang (A.K.A BlueElectron)
This really belongs in the OL.
~~Baloo
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Beer lovers take note:
Stroh's spelled backwards is "shorts."
http://www.geocities.com/cyrano_jones.geo/
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694 consecutive rejections by women since January 1993.
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"Twentieth century go and sleep.
Really deep. We won't blink
Your eyes are burning holes through me.
I'm not scared I'm outta here.
I'm not scared. I'm outta here.
--
R.E.M.
****
Read chapter one of "Dirk Tungsten in...The Disappearing Planet"! Please?
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Look at the past few years:
Jimmy Carter: Who we kidding, Valium Posterchild. We go to:
Ronald Reagan, Howdy Doody Sr. If it keeps getting benign, we might end up with:
Mr. Rogers, "Can you say Armageddon? Oops, too late." Or we can get macho and have:
Jack Nicholson vs. Clint Eastwood, Shortest debate in history, all Jack will have to say is "How can you debate me, you haven't opened your goddammed eyes in twenty years."