*aghast* Krenim has never been on a train! What a poor deprived soul.
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"The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular?"
--David Sarnoff's associates in response to his urgings for investment in the radio in the 1920s.
www.geocities.com/Area51/Shire/8641/
To defeat the Dragonlord, Malroth, Zoma, and Necrosaro.
*Waits to see who understands that and who doesn't*
2. If you were a sovereign state, what would be the motto on your national seal?
Krenimvania: Invaders Welcome!
3. Beans: "Food of the Gods" or "Practical Joke on Humanity"?
Neither. Beans are neither good nor evil. Asparagus, on the other hand...
4. Why are so many snack foods endorsed by animated rabbits?
Silly Baloo, the answer to this question is for kids!
5. Does she or doesn't she, and how come only her hairdresser knows?
Yes, she does. And the hairdresser has been stalking her for over a year now, waiting for the opportunity to steal her identity.
6. Banana or mango?
Both.
*Sets the banana at the far end of the bowling lane and tries to hit it with the mango*
7. If you were designing "the Car of the Future", what feature would you insist it have?
The ability to fold up into a briefcase, like the one the Jetsons have. Parking lots will cease to exist.
8. Trains, planes, or automobiles?
Trains, simply because I've never been on one.
9. I think, therefore _____.?
I think, therefore I wonder why I go through answering these questions each week even though I never win...
10. Some things cost an arm and a leg. What body part do you recommend as a medium of exchange?
My spleen. Considering how it manufactures quite a bit of the white blood cells in one's body, its highly valuable.
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Darlene: I read a lot of science fiction.
Herbert: Bless you, my child.
Kay: The world needs more people like you.
-Deep Space Nine, "Far Beyond the Stars."
To use the Shadow fleet to capture the Krenim weapon/ship, then warp away beyond the Rim, to Lee's place, then to settle in Moron Hell and tweak with the spy sheep.
2. If you were a sovereign state, what would be the motto on your national seal?
The Unified Provinces of Elimway: "Have it your way! Or don't."
3. Beans: "Food of the Gods" or "Practical Joke on Humanity"?
Not really either they're only a practical joke on those who don't eat them, actually.
4. Why are so many snack foods endorsed by animated rabbits?
They learned from Cadbury's mistake with the real bnunny and the casting problems they've turned into promotion. Now these companies can bear the slogan "No ink, plumage, paint shards, or other animation material was harmed in the production of this catoon."
5. Does she or doesn't she, and how come only her hairdresser knows?
She does or else there would be nothing for her hairdresser to know. The hairdresser knows since little poddles let everything out when they're in those chairs, waiting for the cute pink bows.
6. Banana or mango?
Bango... Manana... Who knows? Only one way to find out...
*sings*
Mango Mango Bo Bango
Bonana Fanna Fo Fango
Fe Fi Mo Ango
Mango!
*stops singing*
*tries again, sings*
Banana Banana Bo Anana
Bonana Fanna Fo Fanana
Fe Fi Mo Manana
Banana!
*stops singing*
I must confer with the Shirley Ellis. Mango is the answer you seek.
7. If you were designing "the Car of the Future", what feature would you insist it have?
It must be capable of lying to the traffic cop on a regular basis. It is a skill like any other, after all. I would also require it to be outfitted with an emergency transporter beacon retrieval system and a no-hands bubble gum wrapper-remover and mouth-placer-inner.
8. Trains, planes, or automobiles?
Trains and planes are automobiles, by decomposition of the word.
This question is futile. I will not comply.
9. I think, therefore _____.?
"I think, therefore ACH is produced by the central section of my brain and then sent to a neuron (well, a dendrite to be more precise), at which point the dendrite tranfers this thought from the cell body to the axon, then to the synaptic terminals where simple synaptic vessicles have been signaled to propel the neuron's chemicals to the next neuron's dendrites, a process which is repeated until the message or thought reaches its desired destination (message received, process completed)."
10. Some things cost an arm and a leg. What body part do you recommend as a medium of exchange?
Toe nails. They grow back. (equivalent to $5)
Finger nails longer than two cm: $20
Baby toe: $50
Baby finger: $100
Single kidney: $500
Pancreas: $1000
*aghast* Krenim has never been on a train! What a poor deprived soul.
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Doctor: "Run along. I'll reattach any severed limbs. Just don't misplace them." (Voyager: "The Killing Game")
[This message has been edited by Elim Garak (edited July 12, 1999).]
Argh...that's a long story. I was walking home one day after buying some sourdough bread when a huge giraffe appeared before me and said, "You shall buy some sourdough bread!" I replied, "You told me on the way there. Here it is." We were munching away, and then the giraffe said, "You shall retrieve the sacred relic from the forests of Zalmarka!" So, I headed out to Zalmarka, hoping that there was only one sacred relic there. Unfortunately, the plane crashed halfway out. Apparently ZalmarkAir doesn't follow safety standards too well. Luckily, It was only flying at an altitude of 20 ft. anyway, so I escaped just as the plane was sinking. The pilot got out, too. And, well, that was all of us. So, we swam for a few minutes, until the pilot shouted, "Hey, isn't that an oil rig to our left?" Looking up, he was right. "Yup! Right next to that island. Er, continent. Why are we swimming, anyway?" We then walked to shore (since the water was about 2 ft. deep...it was low-altitude day or something), which happened to be the location of a large luxury resort. Unfortunately, the pilot couldn't pay for his room, so he had to sell his plane. I guess the buyer wasn't too happy that it was at the bottom of the ocean, though, so he sued. I was called as the first witness during the trial, and I explained that the water was only 2 ft. deep there, and the only damage to the plane was a bit of rusting and a minor catastrophic engine failure, but those Zalmarkan judges can be strict. Er, wait, I wasn't in Zalmarka just yet...actually, I don't recall which country it was. I probably should've asked. In any case, I asked someone for directions to Zalmarka and rented a jeep. Or, come to think of it, I rented the directions and asked someone for the jeep. Luckily, the person said, "Oh, sure, you can have my jeep," so I hopped in and drove off. He waved and shouted, "Have a nice trip!" Or, now that I think about it, maybe he was shaking his fist and screamed, "That was $%&@ing sarcasm, you &@$%&@%!" Anyway, Zalmarka was just a full day's drive away, but I got there in only 1000 Swatch beats. However, as it turns out...Zalmarka doesn't have any forests; it's entirely desert! Suddenly, the giraffe appeared again, and said that he was confused, and what he really wanted was discount relish from the local Sal's Market. I was really annoyed, so I set the giraffe on fire and fed him to the Zalmarkan sand beast that was stalking me. Still, to this day, I dread going near Nissan dealers.
2.If you were a sovereign state, what would be the motto on your national seal?
Frankland: It's better than most countries. Even Canada.
3.Beans: "Food of the Gods" or "Practical Joke on Humanity"?
Well, all I know is, British comedy wouldn't be the same if we had to watch "Mr. Legume" or something.
4.Why are so many snack foods endorsed by animated rabbits?
It's their way of saying, "Fry up some rabbit and serve it with this snack...it'll taste even better!"
5.Does she or doesn't she, and how come only her hairdresser knows?
I could tell you, but then her hairdresser would have to kill you. And probably seriously injure me. They have those scissors and razors and such.
6.Banana or mango?
It's banana time for Baloo and weep day for mango man.
7.If you were designing "the Car of the Future", what feature would you insist it have?
A microwave!
8.Trains, planes, or automobiles?
Trains, because there wasn't one in the story above.
9.I think, therefore _____.?
I go fast. (Cogito ergo zoom).
10.Some things cost an arm and a leg. What body part do you recommend as a medium of exchange?
All those useless parts, like the appendix and spleen. I mean, what does the spleen do anyway?
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http://frankg.dgne.com/
RB: "'Get a life' is a phrase heard a lot, though I have never known exactly what kind was implied. Seems a lot of shallowness and greed is the rule."
CS: "I guess that it means the kind of life led by the characters of 'Dawson's Creek' or 'The Simpsons'."
[This message has been edited by The Shadow (edited July 12, 1999).]
2.If you were a sovereign state, what would be the motto on your national seal?
"Nyah nyah nyah nyah!" or "We have the bomb too"
3.Beans: "Food of the Gods" or "Practical Joke on Humanity"?
I would think that the Gods have placed a practical joke on humanity with their food.
4.Why are so many snack foods endorsed by animated rabbits?
They have a better union.
5.Does she or doesn't she, and how come only her hairdresser knows?
She does, and her hairdresser knows everything.
6.Banana or mango?
Niether. Boloney Raspberry!
7.If you were designing "the Car of the Future", what feature would you insist it have?
Wing tips, Bubble domes, a separate dome for the kids, LOTS of cup holders, a horn that plays "La Cucha Rocha" and a nice lime-green color!
8.Trains, planes, or automobiles?
Hey, anytime, anywhere....
9."I think, therefore _____.?
...I spam." In this day and age of computers and internet, many people try to show they exist by sending tons of email to people they don't know...
10.Some things cost an arm and a leg. What body part do you recommend as a medium of exchange?
I would have said my brain, but many people don't think that's worth very much anyways...
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"I do whatever the voice of Charles Capps tells me to do."
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Darlene: I read a lot of science fiction.
Herbert: Bless you, my child.
Kay: The world needs more people like you.
-Deep Space Nine, "Far Beyond the Stars."
The second definition says that we don't know what the spleen does, but the third says we do. Go figure.
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http://frankg.dgne.com/
RB: "'Get a life' is a phrase heard a lot, though I have never known exactly what kind was implied. Seems a lot of shallowness and greed is the rule."
CS: "I guess that it means the kind of life led by the characters of 'Dawson's Creek' or 'The Simpsons'."
[This message has been edited by The Shadow (edited July 12, 1999).]
2.If you were a sovereign state, what would be the motto on your national seal?
Welcome to Disney Land.
3.Beans: "Food of the Gods" or "Practical Joke on Humanity"?
Gods are not immune to the effects of beans, How else can you explain thunder?
4.Why are so many snack foods endorsed by animated rabbits?
They aren't rabbits, they're really tribbles.
5.Does she or doesn't she, and how come only her hairdresser knows?
She does, and the hairdresser knows it because it's quite obvious, I mean, if you used mayonaise in YOUR hair I think your hairdresser would know.
6.Banana or mango?
Just what are you trying to imply by this?
7.If you were designing "the Car of the Future", what feature would you insist it have?
Well, I was going to say a microwave, but since Frank already said that I'll need a 10 foot long Frank-killing lance. Frank...how fast can you run?
8.Trains, planes, or automobiles?
Niether, I prefer Autobots.
9.I think, therefore _____.?
I suck, therefore iMac
10.Some things cost an arm and a leg. What body part do you recommend as a medium of exchange?
Well I hear that ones' eyes are quite popular in The Forbidden City, however if I were to choose another it'd have to be my skin. Knowing of course that the skin is practically useless on the market, I would definately opt for my Gull bladder and spleen.
Interested in trading those follwing body parts for your UBB license, CC?
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When I see an elephant fly...I'll shoot the mother down.
To ban the bomb and make the world safe for conventional warfare.
2) If I had a soveriegn state, what would be the motto on the national seal?
"Do you feel lucky?" or perhaps "Expansion is our birthright."
3) Beans: Food of the Gods or Practical Joke on Humanity?
Both: god-food to those who Who Know The Secret, a joke on mortals who do not.
4) Why are so many snack foods endorsed by rabbits?
Because there are so *many* rabbits!
5) Does she or doesn't she, and why does her hairdresser know for sure?
answer the first, Yes, answer the second, Mind Meld.
6) Banana or Mango?
Mango. I mean, who ever heard of banana chutney?
7) If designing the car of the future, what feature would I insist on?
within the confines of the car, cellphones DO NOT WORK.
8) trains, planes, or automobiles?
I choose automobiles, at thirty paces.
9) I think, therefore I can't get a job in management.
10) What body part should be used as a medium of exchange?
The Lungs, rather useful in gas exchange. What about eye-teeth? My Mom always said she'd trade hers for this or that.
To answer the five questions... (Ten questions, sir!) ...ten questions, and, after answering the five questions... (Ten questions!) ...ten questions, to cross the Bridge of Death. Or, barring that, hold a nice discussion on swallow. Do I mean the bird, you ask? Possibly...
2.If you were a sovereign state, what would be the motto on your national seal?
Option 1: People are stupid, except us.
Option 2: We don't like you. Go away.
3.Beans: "Food of the Gods" or "Practical Joke on Humanity"?
Well, if the gods are eating them, I'd have to say both...
4.Why are so many snack foods endorsed by animated rabbits?
Well, when they realized that kids weren't buying the carrots they were advertising, they made a mass exodus to something more profitable.
5.Does she or doesn't she, and how come only her hairdresser knows?
Oh, she does, believe me. And how!
6.Banana or mango?
*Homerspeak* Mmm... Banana... Ahh...
7.If you were designing "the Car of the Future", what feature would you insist it have?
Hm... Tough call between deflector shields and inertial dampers...
8.Trains, planes, or automobiles?
Three words: Amtrak, Corsair, and Pinto.
9.I think, therefore _____.?
I think, therefore I'm that much ahead of most of the rest of the population.
10.Some things cost an arm and a leg. What body part do you recommend as a medium of exchange?
Well, in some cases, the whole thing...
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"Sometimes you really dig a girl the moment you kiss her,
And then you get distracted by her older sister..."
-The Lovin' Spoonful, "Did You Ever Have To Make Up Your Mind?"
2. Beans, The Anointed Food of the Gods!
3. See #2
4. It's the only work they can get, Bugs gets everthing else.
5. She does, with the hair dresser
6. (Banana Man) OOOOH, Nana (/Banana Man)
7. Quantum Torpedos
8. Cars, baby, Cars!!
9.I yam what I yam, and that's all that I yam!!
10.That would depend on Who's body.
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WHO ARE YOU
2: I am the King. Thank you very much.
3: Both.
4: Because real rabbits are smart enough not to endorse them.
5: Because the hairdresser did.
6: Mango banana dude!!
7: It MUST (be) fly!!
8: Planes, what else is there??
9: I think, therefore I do not know yet.
10: The sand in my head.
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"Calm may work for Locutus of the Borg here,
but I'm freaked out, and I intend to stay that way!"
- Xander, Buffy the Vampire Slayer
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All we are is dust in the wind, dude....
Dust, Wind, DUDE!!!
2) My Motto? How about THIS motto? *opens long trenchcoat*
3) Beans, Beans, good for your heart. The more you eat, the more you......... OF COURSE IT IS A PRACTICAL JOKE ON HUMANITY!!!! I bet the dinosaurs were responsible for this. I bet they did this just before they were wiped out for good. Why they did this? The world would never know.
4) Cuz they are sooooo KY-YUTE!!!!!!!
5) Woman: So what do we do today?
Hairdresser: Same as we do every day...... try to take over the world.
Need I say more?
6) Yeechh...... pass me an orange.
7) Unfortunately, I can't afford a car, let alone design one. Oh well, I guess it's back to the confines of Public Transportation.
8) It's PLANES, TRAINS and AUTOMOBILES. And it's starring John Candy and Steve Martin.
On the other hand, I'd prefer planes alot. Except for the crashing-and-burning part.
9) I think, therefore, I'm dangerous. That's why we would have a future which suppresses individual thought to maintain order.........
10) My whole body for $100 trillion. Take it or leave it. Makes you wonder what is the cost of human life.
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I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation
[This message has been edited by Tahna Los (edited July 18, 1999).]
Special Mentions:
The Shadow, as his quest was most impressive (even when compared to Tahna Los' motto.
That's it.
The awards will be presented at the annual secret dinner.
Thank you for coming.
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"Someday your ship will come in...and you'll be at the airport "
www.geocities.com/Area51/Shire/8641/
[This message has been edited by Baloo (edited July 19, 1999).]
Anyway, I suppose I ought to mention that "Cogito ergo zoom" is actually from one of those car magazines...Road and Track, I think.
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http://frankg.dgne.com/
"We spent the entire summer resting up, looking for some vital link missing in the big picture. Bill said he had found it, but in fact he had lost it." - TMBG
But thanks anyway!
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Elim Garak: "Oh, it's just Garak. Plain, simple Garak. Now, good day to you, Doctor. I'm so glad to have made such an... interesting new friend today." (DS9: "Past Prologue")
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Nurse: Can I help you?
Stan: We're here to commit our friend, Kyle.
Nurse: Reason?
Kyle: I'm a clinically depressed fecalpheliac on Prozac.
Nurse: JACKET!!