Flare Sci-Fi Forums: The Fifth Element, or Gary Oldman, How I Weep For Your Soul

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Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :

This was inspired in part by Jay's recent comment about liking this movie, this Fifth Element. He isn't the only one. A good friend of mine likes it too. This friend also purchased, with money, real money, money that he had presumably put some effort into acquiring; with this he purchased Battlefield Earth. Battlefield Earth!

But I digress, messily.

The Fifth Element.

What the hell? I mean, really. Can someone explain to me what part of this film makes it watchable? Is it parody? Do I have to be French to get it?

As I understand it, the film proceeds like this:

In the past, a race of metallic space ducks fought a war with Evil, which exists as a big black chunk of stuff. They built special vaults on Earth to store their anti-Evil weapon, but forgot to put in adequate safety measures. Plus, Luke Perry!

Then the future comes, in which the President of some non-descript but presumably important government dispatches the Well-Manicured Man to shoot at Evil, which has returned. This fails.

Meanwhile, Bruce Willis is a cab driver who used to kick ass for a living. Now he drives a floating (yet charmingly retro) cab in New New York.

Also meanwhile, the space ducks return only to be killed by some space dogs who work for space Gary Oldman. The hand of one of the space ducks is recovered and cloned, and we discover that space ducks are actually French models. Testy French models, though I suppose that goes without saying.

So the space duck/model meets up with the ass-kicking cabbie and adventures begin. They have to find all five elements, which are apparently stuck inside an opera singer. There's shooting and stuff.

Meanwhile, Gary Oldman ACTS. We know this because he ACTS! And he wears a fetching transparent salad bowl on his head.

So then the big climax, which apparently shows how love conquers all, or something.

Again I ask you: the hell?

I've heard that it's all about the visuals. Well, ok, in part I agree. There was some nice production design, and the city looked very good. But apparently the major difference between today and the future is silly hats. And not just hats that look like today's hats with minor modifications. We're talking about hats that closely resemble theme parks or the U.N. General Assembly.

So, what am I missing? Do I need to give it a second chance? Is there something terribly wrong with me?

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I will shout until they know what I mean.
--
Neutral Milk Hotel
****
Read three (three!) chapters of "Dirk Tungsten in...The Disappearing Planet"! Then, go insane!

Posted by Ritten (Member # 417) on :

So, what am I missing? Do I need to give it a second chance? Is there something terribly wrong with
me?

ummm, a different point of view, yes, and yes again...
but anyway...

I think a basic point is that they were running all over looking for this fifth element to make the get-rid-of-evil weapon, and lost hope of finding such a little thing on this great big world. Only to discover, at the last minute, that this french-model-virgin-space-duck was the fifth element. This are never where you expect them to be, or sometimes, what you expect them to be...plus you never know where you'll find your true love....and love conquers all...(except a bad head cold)

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"One's ethics are determined by what we do when no one is looking" Nugget
Star Trek: Gamma Quadrant
Star Trek: Legacy
Read them, rate them, got money, film them....

Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :

"french-model-virgin-space-duck"

"One of these words is not like the other / one of these words just doesn't belong"

I am so sorry.

Anyway, I think, or think that I think, that I get the film. But what makes it worth the effort? It seems, to me, to be ill-conceived and poorly put together, lurching from place to place without ever making me feel like I should care whether Evil gobbles up everyone in the film or not. I suppose what I'm asking is, what makes this film special?

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I will shout until they know what I mean.
--
Neutral Milk Hotel
****
Read three (three!) chapters of "Dirk Tungsten in...The Disappearing Planet"! Then, go insane!

Posted by Ritten (Member # 417) on :

That I have no answer for, sorry.

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"One's ethics are determined by what we do when no one is looking" Nugget
Star Trek: Gamma Quadrant
Star Trek: Legacy
Read them, rate them, got money, film them....

Posted by Lee (Member # 393) on :

It's just a cool movie is all. I enjoyed it. I mean, who cares about how silly the plot is? You give a French guy a big budget to make an SF movie, what do you expect?

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"Businesses used to be like Christianity; if you were faithful and obedient, you could obtain bliss in the afterlife of retirement. Now it's more of a reincarnation model. If the worker learns enough in his current job, he can progress to a higher level of employment elsewhere."

- Dogbert

Posted by The Talented Mr. Gurgeh (Member # 318) on :

I'm not sure that the girl is cloned from a hand. I thought she was cloned from something else on the "space-duck's" ship.

The great thing about the film was the style, the guns, the action, Milla Jovovich, and the detail. Little things, like Bruce Willis lighting a cigarette which was 75% filter, cracked me up.

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*Kenshiro gets off bed made from solid stone*
*Bed made from solid stone explodes*
Fist of the North Star

[This message has been edited by Gurgeh (edited January 30, 2001).]

Posted by Nim (Member # 205) on :

And Sir Ian Holm was good also...
There are many things I like about it, but Willis was one of the best. When he kissed Leeloo, and had to turn 180 there, "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, that was bad".
Chris Tucker was a bit annoying, but they seem to have at least one of those per action-flick.

The ships were nice, I wish there were someplace I could get some good pics of them fighters, or a 3d-model...

One thing I don't get though, when Evil talks to Oldman, some brown syrupy goo drips all over his forehead. What's that all about?

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Here lies a toppled god,
His fall was not a small one.
We did but build his pedestal,
A narrow and a tall one.

-Tleilaxu Epigram

Posted by Michael Dracon (Member # 4) on :

I believe that was supposed to be blood...

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"That's your plan? Wile E. Coyote would come up with a better plan than that!"
- Crighton, Farscape.

Posted by Nim (Member # 205) on :

Yeah? From him? It looks like it's falling on him. Is there a convenient blood-fossit in the ceiling?

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Here lies a toppled god,
His fall was not a small one.
We did but build his pedestal,
A narrow and a tall one.

-Tleilaxu Epigram

Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :

From the edge of the dome thingy he works with. If you watch the Captain of the big-ass-spaceship, he's bleeding too when he's about to get blown to pieces.

I loved this film. I really did -- it was great! Who expects the future to look like that? Although, the wall of the space-port being garbage could happen ...

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Star Trek Gamma Quadrant
Average Rated 6.83 out of 10 Smileys by Fabrux
***
"Oh, yes, screw logic, let's go for a theory with no evidence!"
-Forum Member Who Shall Be Nameless. 11:48am, Jan. 19th, 2001

Posted by Aban Rune (Member # 226) on :

I thought this film had a lot of style, natural humor, and somewhat of an epic feel.

The detail was great. Most everything was printed on velum because there were no more trees to make paper. If you look really carefully as the shuttle lifts off for Phlosten Paradise, you can see that the oceans have receded drastically and that Manhattan Island and the statue of Liberty are like pillars in the center of this huge crater.

And too clarify, Leeloo was indside that statue the Guardians carried out of the pyramid, not one of the duck suits. The hand that was holding the case was the hand of the statue she was in. The Guardians don't all look like her.

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"You don't tug on Superman's cape.
You don't spit into the wind.
You don't pull the mask off the ole' Lone Ranger
And you don't mess around with Jim."
Aban's Illustration www.alanfore.com

Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :

I should note that, possibly, some of my synopsis was intended more towards humorous effect rather than accurate description.

But epic? This was an odd film, and I like odd, but odd good, not odd haphazard or odd random or, dare I say it, odd just not very much fun.

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I will shout until they know what I mean.
--
Neutral Milk Hotel
****
Read three (three!) chapters of "Dirk Tungsten in...The Disappearing Planet"! Then, go insane!

Posted by Saiyanman Benjita (Member # 122) on :

Unfortunately this film fell into the odd-not-very-much-fun department. What is it with French film?

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Though it will go without saying ten minutes into these preceedings, View Askew would like to state that this film is - from start to finish - a work of comedic fantasy, not to be taken seriously. To insist that any of what follows is insensitive or inflammatory is to miss our intentions and pass undue judgement, and passing judgement is reserved for God and God alone (this goes for you film critics too...) Just Kidding
So please, before you think about hurting someone over this trifle of a film, remember God has a sense of humor. Just look at the platypus. Thank you and enjoy the show.
P.S. We sincerely apologize to all platypus enthusiasts out there who are offended by that thoughtless comment about the platypus. We at View Askew respect the noble platypus and it is not our intention to slight these stupid creatures in any way. Thank you and enjoy the show.

-View Askew disclaimer "DOGMA"

Saiyanman Benjita's Dragonball Page

Posted by Aban Rune (Member # 226) on :

I think what we needed was more background. It fit into that epic catagory for me because its story that has been going on for millenia, and here we see the culmination in just a couple of days. I thought the various parties concerned flowed together very nicely and the interaction was very natural.

You've got the Mangalore who don't even give a rat's ass about Korben. They're doing their own thing. Korben's working for the Government, then there's the priest, Mr. Evil, and Zorg all trying to get their hands on the stones and the Fifth Element for different reasons, but they all come together in the culmination of the story.

Of course there's always the sequels...

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

Sol, you nimble headed slacker, what do you know of film...you've never been to Hollywood and I just came from there.

If you are looking for science fiction with a "point" clearly The Fith Element isn't your bag. However is suspnsion of disbelief writ large. It is a wonderful film to sit, bag of popcorn in hand, cognitive skills turned way down low and just look at.

Roger Ebert wrote:

quote:
That's not to say this is a good movie, exactly. It's more of a jumble that includes greatness. Like "Metropolis" or "Blade Runner," it offers such extraordinary visions that you put your criticisms on hold and are simply grateful to see them. If Besson had been able to link those sights with a more disciplined story and more ruthless editing, he might have really had something.

Visually, I think it equals the work on Dark City...TFE is afterall really a film about science fiction art direction. Yet it does not come close to the thoughtfulness or depth of characterof Dark City or Blade Runner.

Why spend the time? Well film is a visual medium afterall and there was a lot to look at and enjoy there. And I though Gary Oldman made another juicy bad guy role tres cool.

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"We're just going to have a lot of work. ... Redefining the role of the United States from enablers to keep the peace to enablers to keep the peace from peacekeepers is going to be an assignment."
~ George W. Bush, Deer-In-The-Headlights of the United States

Posted by Vacuum robot lady from Spaceballs (Member # 239) on :

She cried when she read about war on her horribly non-friendly GUI'd computer. And then she was mad, and didn't want to save the world for a bit. But then she did.

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"...screw logic, let's go for a theory with no evidence!" - Omega.

Irony ensues.

Free Jeff K

Posted by First of Two (Member # 16) on :

Why is everybody calling Leeloo FRENCH???

I thought Model/Actress/Singer Milla Jovovich was Polish, or Ukranian, or from some other Eastern European country, not *gakh* French.

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"My knowledge and experience far exceeds your own, by, oh, about a BILLION times!" -- Q

Posted by Ritten (Member # 417) on :

Milla Jovovich (pronounced "MEE-luh YO-vuh-vich") was born on the 17th of December, 1975 in Kiev, Ukraine. When
she was only five, she moved to the United States with her parents.

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"One's ethics are determined by what we do when no one is looking" Nugget
Star Trek: Gamma Quadrant
Star Trek: Legacy
Read them, rate them, got money, film them

"...and I remain on the far side of crazy, I remain the mortal enemy of man, no hundred dollar cure will save me..." WoV

Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :

My story is that anyone who marries a French movie director immediately becomes French themself. Yes.

------------------
I will shout until they know what I mean.
--
Neutral Milk Hotel
****
Read three (three!) chapters of "Dirk Tungsten in...The Disappearing Planet"! Then, go insane!

Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :

"And I though Gary Oldman made another juicy bad guy role tres cool."

Hmm. I think Gary Oldman has joined Jeremy Irons in the category of talented actors whose agents are apparently bonobos, or some form of ground sloths.

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I will shout until they know what I mean.
--
Neutral Milk Hotel
****
Read three (three!) chapters of "Dirk Tungsten in...The Disappearing Planet"! Then, go insane!

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

Yes, Gary Oldman has made some strange career choices to be sure. He is a much better actor than Lost In Space would allow for.

[This message has been edited by Jay (edited January 31, 2001).]

Posted by Quatre Winner (Member # 464) on :

If you think that's something, check him out in "State of Grace". He's BRILLIANT in that movie.

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"Okashii na... namida ga nagareteru. Hitotsu mo kanashikunai no ni."
(That's funny... my tears are falling. And I'm not sad at all.) - Quatre Raberba Winner

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

Yes, that was a good flick.

Posted by Pro. Portside on :

here is what I think of the movie. It was ok not all that good but still it was all right.

Zorg came off like a deminted Forest Gump to me. Gary's acting ability is evedent by the fact that the Zorg charicter is worth talking about.

Dallas shoud have shot Ruby before leving that big floting hotel/ship.

As for the details . LOVED them the flying junk was a good touch I thought. and the Trains that ran up and down the sides of buildings, cool.

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Tribbles and warp cores dont mix

Posted by Nim (Member # 205) on :

Demented Forrest Gump? That would amount to the Pakleds... As I recall, he was very intelligent, like all of his bad guys.

Has anyone seen Gary's first big role, "Sid and Nancy" (1986)? He played the british punk-singer Sid Vicious, from Sex Pistols. Must've been good, haven't seen it though.

------------------
Here lies a toppled god,
His fall was not a small one.
We did but build his pedestal,
A narrow and a tall one.

-Tleilaxu Epigram

Posted by The Talented Mr. Gurgeh (Member # 318) on :

Was Olman the guy in "The Crow" and "Event Horizon"?

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*Kenshiro gets off bed made from solid stone*
*Bed made from solid stone explodes*
Fist of the North Star

Posted by Nim (Member # 205) on :

No and no. Michael Wincott with the razor-voice was in "The Crow" and british Sam Neill was in "Event Horizon". At least, those are the people I'd think you confused him with...
Funny though, Michael Wincott and Gary Oldman both starred in "Basquiat"...

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Here lies a toppled god,
His fall was not a small one.
We did but build his pedestal,
A narrow and a tall one.

-Tleilaxu Epigram

[This message has been edited by Nimrod (edited January 31, 2001).]

Posted by Lee (Member # 393) on :

"Sid & Nancy" was alright in a "I'm making a deeply cool movie, and if you don't like it or have a problem with it, then you're far too unhip to be watching it in the first place, so there!" kind of way. The amusing thing is that when he went on to play American characters in movies like "Criminal Law" and "State of Grace," some idiots in Hollywood were so fooled they used to congratulate him on the great British accent he did in "S&N."

- Dogbert

Posted by The Talented Mr. Gurgeh (Member # 318) on :

I wasn't thinking of Sam Neill, I thought there was another guy, with black hair who got killed. I could be mixing Event Horizon up with one of the Alien movies.

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*Kenshiro gets off bed made from solid stone*
*Bed made from solid stone explodes*
Fist of the North Star

Posted by Nim (Member # 205) on :

Well Michael Wincott was the blackhaired captain who got an alien tongue through his stomach, in Alien IV (Resurrection), yes. And he was the longhaired bad guy in "The Crow" too, but he's hardly Gary Oldman.

Here, this will aid thee in thy quest...

http://flareupload.hypermart.net/files/garymike.jpg

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Here lies a toppled god,
His fall was not a small one.
We did but build his pedestal,
A narrow and a tall one.

-Tleilaxu Epigram

[This message has been edited by Nimrod (edited January 31, 2001).]

Posted by The Talented Mr. Gurgeh (Member # 318) on :

Yeah, the guy on the right is the guy I was confusing with Oldman. Ta.

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*Kenshiro gets off bed made from solid stone*
*Bed made from solid stone explodes*
Fist of the North Star

Posted by Nim (Member # 205) on :

Well, when I started comparing different photos I could see how one could do that. If not for the voice differential.

Seriously, Mr Wincott reminds me of a sawmill!

------------------
Here lies a toppled god,
His fall was not a small one.
We did but build his pedestal,
A narrow and a tall one.

-Tleilaxu Epigram

Posted by colin (Member # 217) on :

I like the Fifth Element.
When I watch the shuttle leave for Phloston Paradise, I am think of the direction that our interests in space are heading. Exploration is for the robots. Tourism, especially in orbital space, is for us humans. An individual is paying $20 million to be the first tourist. He will be stationed on the ISS for a week. And there is a race to get the first true tourist spacecraft into space.

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takeoffs are optional; landings are mandatory

Posted by PsyLiam (Member # 73) on :

The ISS will be armed with type XIIII phaser arrays, and 573 photon torpedoes. The kitchen is being retrofitted to handle super-cobalt-quantum torpedoes, which will be able to fightr off 342 Romulan ducks-or-prey. Tech!

The Fifth Element was uber-pants. Sorry, I can't even watch it in an ironic, light-hearted manner, and I liked Con Air! The Fifth Element was pantsier than Simon's really big pants.

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"And Mojo was hurt and I would have kissed his little boo boo but then I realized he was a BAD monkey so I KICKED HIM IN HIS FACE!"
-Bubbles

Posted by Michael Dracon (Member # 4) on :

Okay, a question about those ships they used to try to destroy the big ball'o'evil. Did anyone else thought 'Space: Above and Beyond' when you saw those ships??

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I thought a professional demon chaser like yourself would've figured it out by now. I'm the Slayer. Slay-er. Chosen One. She-who-hangs-out-a-lot-in-cemeteries? Ask around. Look it up: "Slayer, comma, the."
- Buffy, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Posted by Quatre Winner (Member # 464) on :

Not really. But how about them fighter/shuttles? Shades of Minbari Nial class fighters, no?

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"Okashii na... namida ga nagareteru. Hitotsu mo kanashikunai no ni."
(That's funny... my tears are falling. And I'm not sad at all.) - Quatre Raberba Winner

Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :

That pop-up tactical target thingy was pretty god-damn cool, IMOHO