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» Flare Sci-Fi Forums » Community » Officers' Lounge » And the best headline of the year goes to... (Page 1)

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Author Topic: And the best headline of the year goes to...
Sean
First Tenor
Member # 2010

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Man gets nut stuck around penis

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"Kosh, I'd like to introduce you to our Resident schmuck and his side kick Kick Me."-Ritten

"Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity".
-George Carlin

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Aban Rune
Former ascended being
Member # 226

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And he wanted to *improve* his honeymoon... I think having the top layer of skin from one's manhood removed will put a damper on one's lovelife for a while.

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"Nu ani anqueatas"

Aban's Illustration
The Official Website of Shannon McRandle

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Saltah'na
Chinese Canadian, or 75% Commie Bastard.
Member # 33

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Geez Sean, the best you could have done is to wait for ME to come up with some witty title!!! [Big Grin]

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"And slowly, you come to realize, it's all as it should be, you can only do so much. If you're game enough, you could place your trust in me. For the love of life, there's a tradeoff, we could lose it all but we'll go down fighting...." - David Sylvian
FreeSpace 2, the greatest space sim of all time, now remastered!

Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Teh PW
Self Impossed Exile (This Space for rent)
Member # 1203

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quote:
Originally posted by Saltah'na:
Geez Sean, the best you could have done is to wait for ME to come up with some witty title!!! [Big Grin]

wow... for once you're slow, you silly canuck ( [Big Grin] LOL [Big Grin] )

thought, honestly, it proves that the 3rd world s also the 3rd stupidiest...

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Nim
The Aardvark asked for a dagger
Member # 205

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B/C SOMEONE ALRDY CLAIMED NO.1 SPOT
Registered: Aug 1999  |  IP: Logged
Jason Abbadon
Rolls with the punches.
Member # 882

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Sometimes you feel like a nut...
I know a pair of paramedics that work at my wound-care center that tell me the most disgusting stories of stuff they've removed from morons.

They have a cordless drill in the ambulance for removing bottles....

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Justice inclines her scales so that wisdom comes at the price of suffering.
-Aeschylus, Agamemnon

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Sean
First Tenor
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quote:
Originally posted by Saltah'na:
Geez Sean, the best you could have done is to wait for ME to come up with some witty title!!! [Big Grin]

I thought the title of the article was funny enough. I just looked at title and burst out laughing. Actualy, it ws more of a WTF? moment, but still...

Jason, yeah, my dad's a paramedic. I get those weird ass stories of stuff stuck up people's butts all the time. I think the weirdest intentional insertion I've heard was a dog chew toy. I'll have to ask him if they keep a drill handy for bottle removal. [Wink]

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"Kosh, I'd like to introduce you to our Resident schmuck and his side kick Kick Me."-Ritten

"Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity".
-George Carlin

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Jason Abbadon
Rolls with the punches.
Member # 882

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It's to release suction...(shudder).
weirdest thing I ever heard of was a Swifter handle (the two prong thingie).
Also consider we have the whole "South Beach" scene- more weirdness than a fetish convention every weekend.

I saw pics of some poor fuck that tried to blow his head off with a sotgun, only shot off his face, found Jesus in the hospital and now is born again with only a breathing tube for a face.
The Paramedic on scene first about jumped when the guy's (aparantly headless) body started convulsing.

People are insane.

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Justice inclines her scales so that wisdom comes at the price of suffering.
-Aeschylus, Agamemnon

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Daniel Butler
I'm a Singapore where is my boat
Member # 1689

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Lightbulbs up people's rectal regions are the ones I've heard about on TV a lot. They're dangerous because the bulb creates a suction effect and gets stuck (or drawn in - on show I saw, it was in *all the way* - butt swallowed it). In surgery then they have to be reaaallly careful not to shatter it. The one I saw, luckily the screw end had gone in first, so they could attach a suction cup to the other end and draw it out that way (I believe after pumping the rectum full of lubricant).
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Jason Abbadon
Rolls with the punches.
Member # 882

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I've heard of bottles getting stuck- the open end is "in" and it suctions there (thus the drill for the bottle's bottom).

Did I mention that people are insane?
I mean, a Light bulb?!?

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Justice inclines her scales so that wisdom comes at the price of suffering.
-Aeschylus, Agamemnon

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Mars Needs Women
Sexy Funmobile
Member # 1505

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When my sister worked at an ER, she told me that a man came in who "accidentally" burned his penis. That's why you don't hump ovens.
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Harry
Stormwind City Guard
Member # 265

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Well, I suppose he could claim it was friction.

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Titan Fleet Yards | Memory Alpha

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Daniel Butler
I'm a Singapore where is my boat
Member # 1689

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Speaking of ERs and burnt privates. There was an episode of ER once, where a young woman comes in fanning her burned inner thighs with her skirt, and says, "I burned my legs." Dr. Green made the nurse stay in the room with him while he rubbed whatever ointment on her legs and she came on to him.

Thing is, their reactions when she walked in with the burns made it pretty clear they knew how she'd gotten the burns *wink wink* and how she'd act with the good doctor. So, whu, whu, why, what? I was *so* confused...what, she...had sex with a pot of boiling water?

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Sean
First Tenor
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I'd have to see the episode to really understand that...sounds oddly interesting. Then again, ER has had some pretty interesting stuff happen. Pitty it's ending this season.

Back to the injured genitalia...

My first thought when I saw the article was " WTF? Aren't they already attached?" Then I read more...

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"Kosh, I'd like to introduce you to our Resident schmuck and his side kick Kick Me."-Ritten

"Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity".
-George Carlin

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AndrewR
Resident Nut-cache
Member # 44

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quote:
Originally posted by Daniel Butler:
Dr. Green made the nurse stay in the room with him while he rubbed whatever ointment on her legs and she came on to him.

OK for a second there I missed the 'to' at the end of the sentence. [Wink]

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"Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica." - Jim Halpert. (The Office)

I'm LIZZING! - Liz Lemon (30 Rock)

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