1). How do you put a giraffe into a refrigerator?
Correct answer:
Open the refrigerator door, put in the giraffe and close the door.
(* This question tests whether you tend to do simple things in an overly complicated way *)
2). How do you put an elephant into a refrigerator?
Wrong Answer:
Open the refrigerator door, put in the elephant and close the refrigerator.
Correct Answer:
Open the refrigerator, take out the giraffe, put in the elephant and close the door.
(* This tests your ability to think through the repercussions of your actions *)
3). The Lion King is hosting an animal conference. All the animals attend except one.
Which animal does not attend?
Correct Answer: The Elephant.
The Elephant is in the refrigerator.
(* This tests your memory. Even if you did not answer the first three questions correctly,
you still have one more chance to show your abilities *)
4). There is a river you must cross. But it is inhabited by crocodiles.
How do you manage it?
Correct Answer: You swim across. All the Crocodiles are attending the Animal Meeting.
(* This tests whether you learn quickly from your mistakes *)
According to Andersen Consulting Worldwide,
around 90% of the professionals they tested got all questions wrong.
But many preschoolers got several correct answers.
AC says this conclusively disproves the theory that most professionals have the brains of a four year old.
------------------
"Cry havoc and let's slip the dogs of Evil"
[This message has been edited by The_Evil_Lord (edited April 23, 2001).]
Sometimes jobs that seem simple turn out to be more complicated than anticipated.
2) Assuming the refrigerator can hold the giraffe, can you get the elephant in the refigerator alongside the giraffe?
Sometimes it's better to do two things together than one at a time.
3) If you can get both of them in the refrigerator, then the giraffe will be absent from the meeting too.
Actions taken at the beginning could lead to a different solution later on.
4) What if you can't swim?
Sometimes you need to understand and accept your limitations.
------------------
The Worlds Ten Greatest 'Fucks' #9
Who let that fucking woman drive? - Captain of Space Shuttle
[This message has been edited by Orion Syndicate (edited April 23, 2001).]
------------------
"In a completely unrelated news story, I have a date tomorrow night."
- Omega, in trying to explain why pigs are now flying, why Microsoft products are now working perfectly, hell freezing over, and George W Bush giving a flawless speech. 04/06/01, 12:17AM
------------------
"Well if it's gonna be that kind of a party, I'm putting my dick in the mashed potatoes!"
-Nimrod 16/4/2001
------------------
"Although, from what I understand, having travelled around the Mid-west quite a bit, apparently Jesus is coming, so I guess the choice now is we should decide whether we should spit or swallow."
-Maynard James Keenan
------------------
Star Trek Gamma Quadrant
Average Rated 8.32 out of 10 Smileys by Fabrux (with seven eps posted)
***
"Oh, yes, screw logic, let's go for a theory with no evidence!"
-Omega 11:48am, Jan. 19th, 2001
***
"I think this reason why girls don't do well on multiple choice tests goes all the way back to the Bible, all the way back to Genesis, Adam and Eve. God said, 'All right, Eve, multiple choice or multiple orgasms, what's it going to be?' We all know what was chosen" - Rush Limbaugh, Feb. 23, 1994.
Mammals = Animals, last time I watched Discovery Channel. (Obviously, for the horse sex, mind you.)
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
------------------
"Although, from what I understand, having travelled around the Mid-west quite a bit, apparently Jesus is coming, so I guess the choice now is we should decide whether we should spit or swallow."
-Maynard James Keenan
------------------
"I can be creative when I have a good idea. That just happens way too rarely."
-Omega, April 6
It should be "What element is your Battle Beast: Fire, Wood or Water?"
------------------
At that point, McDonald fired his gun three times in the air to emphasize his point. The crowd, estimated at 350,000, loudly cheered the new candidate.
"Let me make this clear: I am the law! I am your ruler! And you will have fries with that, motherf*cker!"
------------------
Awww...He ate my cookie!
------------------
"I'm beginning to think that there'll be NO forced mating at ALL!" --Professor Hubert T. Farnsworth
And doesn't it burn?
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
Now what she means by that is anyone's guess.
------------------
At that point, McDonald fired his gun three times in the air to emphasize his point. The crowd, estimated at 350,000, loudly cheered the new candidate.
"Let me make this clear: I am the law! I am your ruler! And you will have fries with that, motherf*cker!"
------------------
�
------------------
Don't kill me, I'm charming!
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
What use would having an enormous cock be to Simon? OK, it could wake up the entire West Coast of the States every morning with it's stentorian whine, but that's about it.
Unless, of course, he was to enter it into those country fetes that occur in England - you know, the ones where farmers show of the sizes of their marrows and carrots.
------------------
At that point, McDonald fired his gun three times in the air to emphasize his point. The crowd, estimated at 350,000, loudly cheered the new candidate.
"Let me make this clear: I am the law! I am your ruler! And you will have fries with that, motherf*cker!"
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
And do the farmers show off their melons, or is it the farmers' daughters?
------------------
"Although, from what I understand, having travelled around the Mid-west quite a bit, apparently Jesus is coming, so I guess the choice now is we should decide whether we should spit or swallow."
-Maynard James Keenan
------------------
Don't kill me, I'm charming!
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.