Flare Sci-Fi Forums: CapCom 101-C

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Posted by The First One (Member # 35) on :

No, there haven't been 100 CapComs, although it sometimes seems like it whenever I tabulate the results - but yesterday was the first anniversary! So, a return to the classic name. . .

Ooh look! Other Enterprise crewmembers! Shatner must have been ill or something. . .

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

Uhura: I don't care who you are. If you touch me again, I'm filing sexual harassment charges.

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My childhood was typical: summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring, we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent, I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds. Pretty standard, really.

Posted by deadcujo (Member # 13) on :

Uhura: "This is my panel! Go away!"

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The Unknown Vulcan

Posted by Jeff Raven (Member # 20) on :

Uhura: Scotty, you ever wonder why we're the only red shirts that never die?

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"Bickering is pointless." - Spock, Miri
"I'm real easy to get along with most of the time, but I don't like bullies, and I don't like threats." - Janeway, State of Flux

Posted by TSN (Member # 31) on :

Uhura: "So then she said that he didn't, but I said of course he did, I saw it myself, but she wouldn't believe me, so I called Spock over and he told her he did, but she wouldn't believe both of us, so I guess she'll just have to�"

*Kirk walks in*

Uhura: *louder* "...recalibrate the plasma relays for better warp performance... Oh, hello, Captain."

Kirk: "Hello, Lieutenant. Commander." *thinks* Why do I always get the feeling they've been talking about me?

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"About as useful as a narcoleptic rickshaw driver."
-James Lileks

Posted by Xentrick (Member # 64) on :

Uhura: "You're an engineer-- can't you do something about these noisy switches and unconvincing rear-projection screens?"

Scotty: "Och, I wish I could, lass, but it's only the 23rd Century and this is the best we can do."

Posted by Xentrick (Member # 64) on :

Scotty: "So, lass, what do ya say?"

Uhura: "Put on thirty kilos in thirty years and then we'll talk, okay?"

Scotty: "It's a date!"

Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :

Uhura: I saw you eyeing that girl with the spots she was a bit tall for you Mr. Scott...

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Alamaraine, count to four...

Posted by Saltah'na (Member # 33) on :

Uhura: I just saw Kirk in bed with [insert name here] through this monitor here.......

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I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation

[This message was edited by Tahna Los on April 07, 1999.]

Posted by AndrewR (Member # 44) on :

Uhura: Scotty, coming to my Fan dance this evening?
Scotty: uh? eh? yes... wouldn't miss it...

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Alamaraine, count to four...

Posted by Jaresh Inyo on :

Uhura: Scotty, I'm starting to think the computer isn't as fast as it could be.

Scotty: What makes ye say that, lass?

Uhura: Well, I asked for the computer to display some information on the local comm traffic five years ago, but it's still showing that damn line and stupid nebula and saying "Working...working..."

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Josh: I think they're getting to know each other a bit too well, if you catch my drift.
Me: Oh, I agree. I think they're spending too much time together, that is of course, if you catch my drift.
Asher: I think he's *ucking her, and he's cheating on his wife, and he's risking his marriage, and if his wife finds out about it she'll leave him and take their son, and his life will be ruined. If you catch my drift...

Posted by jh on :

Uhura: At least your skirt doesn't ride so high that your bare ass is always on these cold leather seats.

Scotty: At least you get to sit down. How many times do they show me in engineering just standing around? Get a freakin' stool for Chrissake!

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"A screaming comes across the sky..."

Posted by Jeff Raven (Member # 20) on :

Uhura: Its still installing, Scotty. It took 15 minutes to go from 34 minutes to 33 minutes.

Scotty: Och, its the new standard. The Microsoft minute.

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"Bickering is pointless." - Spock, Miri
"I'm real easy to get along with most of the time, but I don't like bullies, and I don't like threats." - Janeway, State of Flux

Posted by The Excalibur (Member # 34) on :

Uhura: Oh, Romeo!

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The Naked Time

Posted by Krenim (Member # 22) on :

Scotty: Is that a microwormhole on the screen behind you?

Uhura: Uh... No.

Scotty: Are you sure?

Uhura: Yes.

Faint Voice From Uhura's Ear Gizmo: This is Captain Kathryn Janeway of the Federation Starship Voyager. We are in the Delta Quadrant...

Scotty: Did you hear that?

Uhura: Hear what?

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Ah... Now I enter these hallowed halls a conqueror... Yes...

-Megatron, "The Agenda, Part Three"

Posted by Jeff Raven (Member # 20) on :

Uhura: Scotty, I'm picking up a transmission...Its an old terran TV show...

Scotty: Lass, Dinnae you know? TV'll rot yer brain. Turn it off.

Uhura: I suppose you're right. Who'd watch a show with such a silly name as "Star Trek"?

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"Bickering is pointless." - Spock, Miri
"I'm real easy to get along with most of the time, but I don't like bullies, and I don't like threats." - Janeway, State of Flux

Posted by Jeff Raven (Member # 20) on :

Uhura: Sir, we've been banned from the porno sites.

Scotty: Kirk's not gonna like this...

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"Bickering is pointless." - Spock, Miri
"I'm real easy to get along with most of the time, but I don't like bullies, and I don't like threats." - Janeway, State of Flux

Posted by Cargile (Member # 45) on :

Uhura: Spin the chair back around. I don't the logo is centered.

Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :

Uhura: "Ok, let's see...yellow, orange, red, green, blue...wait a minute. Roy G. Biv... Mr. Scott! Our spectrum is damaged!"

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"And though I once prefered a human being's company, they pale before the monolith that towers over me."
--
They Might Be Giants

Posted by Jubilee (Member # 99) on :

Uhura:No.

Scotty:Ooh, Please? If I beg ye nicely?

Uhura: NO.

Scotty:Well, why NOT, Lass?

Uhura:I'm not in the mood.

Scotty:All I'm asking for is your last bottle of whiskey .. now surely, a nice lass like you would love to hand over a bottle....

Uhura:GET YOUR OWN, little man ... and STOP LOOKING AT MY THIGH LIKE THAT.

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Ring this little golden bell
And see what changes with it's knell
Or Wonder, till it drives you mad...
What would have happened if you HAD.

Posted by The First One (Member # 35) on :

The winner is Krenim. Runners-up are Jeff Raven and TSN.

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"I am greater than the stars for I know that they are up there and they do not know that I am down here." - William Temple