posted
I was just looking at my "recent" posting history and I'm amazed at how drastic the drop-off was. From a regular in 2009, to only six posts in 2010, and just on in 2011.
I still spend plenty of time on the Internet, but find I tend to interact with people less. I used Facebook for a while, but got fed up with it and am now on the verge of deleting my account - if I can be bothered to do even that. I've become fond of Twitter recently (@LeePKelly if you really want to know) but it's not a particularly interactive medium unless you really make the effort.
Partly it's because of my job, which I can't tell you about.
Mostly it's because of Frannie. She's our second child, born late 2009. And she takes up a lot of our time and is a real source of worry for us. I've mentioned in the past (one of the threads discussing Jay's illness, before he died, I think) that my wife had some medical problems. It was only when Frannie was born that it was revealed these were down to a genetic condition called Alagille's Syndrome, which they both have.
So Frannie has a heart condition. It's different to Kate's, perhaps not as severe though the doctors can't predict what she'll be like when she grows up. She's had a couple of catheterisations, and a balloon angiogram (I think it's called) and we think we've seen a difference but the consultant isn't convinced and thinks it's probably coincidental. No further intervention is planned at the moment.
You wouldn't really know it to look at her. She's an incredibly strong and boisterous two-year-old, and scarily intelligent.
And fortunately she won't really remember screaming and thrashing while we held her down so the anaesthetist could gas her unconscious for the prcoedures, knowing there was a chance it'd be the last thing she ever remembered. It's just her parents who have the nightmares.
We laugh, we have a good time, we enjoy being a family, but it's always there in the back of our minds. Life goes on, but it's plain that a little bit of the optimism we once felt, especially before she was born, is gone.
posted
So sorry to hear of your wife and child's condition- I imagine you're already giving them enhanced vitamins and such, and reading on it, it seems that the liver's bile ducts are too narrow due to one gene's mischief...
That being said, there's a ton of new adavances in gene therapy and the growing of organs from the cells of the organ's reciepant- it's very possible that we'll live to see this problem eliminated.
At least they know what it is- but the condition being so rare, I'd imagine specialists are equally rare.
Hopefully your secret agent/ superhero job gives you solid insurance coverage- amd hopefully the jackasses on the Supreme Court think more for kids like yours and less for partisan politics.
As to posting less, mee too- I'm around some, here and abroad, but the vigorus debates I used to get into have lapsed- mostly I need people willing to discuss subjects objectivly- and the iNternet seems more filled with misinformation and mental illness than ever before.
Plus, there's no new trek to discuss here and us Flarites have generally moved to the left on the Political compass- meaning that while I can share some new outrage like the Travon Martin shooting (which blew up nicely), most of us now just shake our heads in disgust instead of thrashing it out.
Registered: Aug 2002
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posted
In overall life news, I started my first day back with a new company after being laid off for four months with my previous employer. Getting married in July and tossing the idea around of buying a house in the near future.
These days most of my messageboard browsing consists of model cars and real trucks. Not much sci-fi on the air that I watch and/or want to discuss. *shrug*
-------------------- I haul cardboard and cardboard accessories
Registered: Mar 1999
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Saltah'na
Chinese Canadian, or 75% Commie Bastard.
Member # 33
posted
I think the reason why this board has tapered off in usage is that most of us are now using other forms of social media. Gone are the days when it used to be the Forums and stuff. TrekBBS? Wow that was a long time ago. MSN? Hardly use it anymore. Now for me it is a combination of BBM and Facebook.
Lee, hang in there, hopefully things will look good for you and your family in the near future.
As for other life related milestones, some of you already on my Facebook have seen my wedding photos. We just bought a house and will be moving in two weeks. Sheesh, gotta get packing, still so much to do.....
-------------------- "And slowly, you come to realize, it's all as it should be, you can only do so much. If you're game enough, you could place your trust in me. For the love of life, there's a tradeoff, we could lose it all but we'll go down fighting...." - David Sylvian FreeSpace 2, the greatest space sim of all time, now remastered!
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
My use tapered off due to life getting in the way and me focusing on other things. I still pop in to check up on things and peeps. I also bought a house 16 months ago and it's been a total nightmare - burst water pipe during the frost, insurance company voiding my policy leaving me screwed and short on cash, the damage being worse than thought meaning more work which took longer, depression/desire to kill myself (yeah it got that bad before I cried "help!" ), shitty work, shitty work and shitty work.
Sorry to hear about your woes, puts mine into perspective as not that bad, but I'm glad that you're able to stick together and still be a family - that's important and it's nice to see despite your current hardship. Family is everything as I re-learned during this last year or so. And since you're all an extended part of my family...
GROUP HUG! \o/
-------------------- If you cant convince them, confuse them.
Registered: Apr 2001
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posted
I'm very sorry to hear all that, Lee. I wish I knew what to say.
I haven't been around here much either, obviously. I've spent more time on Ex Isle (former Andromeda board), but that's tapering off too. Like we all say, real life plus less to talk about. I've been married four years now, bought a house a year ago. Work's going well, been designing power electronics for five years now. Wrote a book that can't be published, now working on one that can. Ran for Congress. Teaching occasionally. Life's pretty good, all around. But I do miss this place sometimes. It really influenced me.
In case I've never said this, I really do apologize for any abuse I may have heaped upon any of you in my youth. I'm frequently embarrassed to think about the irritating little brat that I once was.
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
Yeah, maybe we are living in the twilight of the online forum. Lee I hope that things do work out for you.
Registered: Feb 2005
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Saltah'na
Chinese Canadian, or 75% Commie Bastard.
Member # 33
posted
"In case I've never said this, I really do apologize for any abuse I may have heaped upon any of you in my youth. I'm frequently embarrassed to think about the irritating little brat that I once was."
Kids during that period of time think they know everything. It's rooted in that invulnerability mentality. Trust me, I've been in that same phase as well.
If anything, knowing that I have been a member of this forum since the mid nineties, it's good to know how different we are now than we were before. The microcosm that is Flare is like one big online petri dish, you see an evolution of many lives at once.
-------------------- "And slowly, you come to realize, it's all as it should be, you can only do so much. If you're game enough, you could place your trust in me. For the love of life, there's a tradeoff, we could lose it all but we'll go down fighting...." - David Sylvian FreeSpace 2, the greatest space sim of all time, now remastered!
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
It's scary, I feel quite paternal these days, remembering how young some of you were - and now many of you married, sometimes with kids. . . This carries on, I'll end up feeling grandpaternal. If that's even a word.
As someone said, there is no TV SF worth watching right now. Or at least making the effort to start - in the UK, anything like that is on satellite so unless I decide to make the effort to obtain it by, er, other means, on spec - like I did with BSG and Firefly purely on you guys' say-so - I don't get to watch it. A couple of the guys I work with (it's a very geeky environment) are avid Fringe fans but at this late juncture I doubt I'd bother. I watched The Walking Dead s1 but not s2 - for obvious reasons, things with people dying don't play well right now. I'm determined to watch Game of Thrones whough in truth I've never really been into Fantasy (in preparation, I'm re-reading David Eddings on my Kindle at the moment - gutted to only just hear he died a couple of years ago).
I think we all did things back then we probably wouldn't now. I was very angry, I know that now. It all seemed to matter a lot more than it really did. Well, sometimes it seemed like none of us had a clue...
We've been living here in our house in Bristol for 6 years now, it's funny to finally have a place I can call home, I've moved around a lot. I don't want to stay here forever but I'm not in any hurry to move: but I have a 35 mile commute up the M5 motorway every day and fuel isn't going to get any cheaper. I may have to move closer to work. But it's not the most affordable town to live in, not if you're just a civil servant (government employee).
I always used to say that this place was past its prime and should just be quietly put to sleep. But now I kinda like the idea that it's still here, and we can always wander in when we need to, a place where everyone knows your name.
As for Flare . . . there really is still a great deal of pure research to be done about Trek, and this group is the best to bounce it off of, sometimes. For a 'recent' example:
. . . and I was recently (as in last year) noticing short travel times in the early TNG episodes I was rewatching that had ramifications regarding warp velocities which, as far as I know, no one's ever brought up . . . so it isn't like the topic is not on the brain.
The thing is, we're all of ages where we haven't the time for such luxurious expenditures of wasted effort. Whether it's family medical issues or career or what-have-you, such thinking is often best done quietly as a simple Paul Stubbs baseball game, as it were, rather than a discussion involving lots of typing. Were I to win the lottery I'd probably spend a bit more time on this sort of thing, but as it stands I don't even have time to finish this sen
-------------------- . . . ceterum censeo Carthaginem esse delendam.
posted
Ahh, I still love coming here. It reminds me of good times in the 90s. I hope this board remains. A bastion of the old, uncomplicated internet. An elegant board for a more civilised age.
I don't really know what half of you look like, or where you live. etc. This is a shame. I guess it's the nature of the medium.
I could have any number of things to share with you all, some exciting some not so. However I must go to bed. Have stayed up to watch Discovery's last flight to Dulles airport.
-------------------- "Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica." - Jim Halpert. (The Office)
posted
Figured I'd chime in with a "hello" here.... these last few weeks have reminded me deeply of all the things that have changed in my life - like my lack of flare. But a recently noticed fight on my sister's facebook page about which is bigger - a galaxy class vessel or a romulan warbird REALLY brought things home to me! I mean, first of all - amateurs! second of all, Facebook didn't even exist when I used to spend all my time here at Flare, ya know?
So, Lee, I'm sorry to hear about all of the family health issues. I know how rough those can be when it's the adults that are impacted - I can't imagine what it would be like if it was my son...truly, my heart and prayers go out to all of you...
Speaking of my son, he's 2 years old now, and thinks he owns the world. His father has so far chosen to have nothing to do with his life, but that's his loss. I actually prefer it this way because it's less drama down the line if I find a man that I think is worth MY while and would BE a good dad to my son :-)
It's rough though, because my son is already showing signs that in some areas he's highly intelligent. Like his vocabulary that rivals a 3 or 4 year old - and he NEVER stops talking! (wonder where he got that from?). But also he has already picked up on the fact that the other kids at daycare have dads and he doesn't and keeps asking me why. I knew the question would come - just didn't expect it so soon. But I just try to take things one day at a time and I get by.
Scott (the ex) really did a number on my as he tore out of my life, leaving me for his best friend's wife (classy, right), then telling me at like 32 weeks preggo that he wasn't ready to be a dad or help out at all and I was on my own. Among other things. All in all, it pretty well tore my heart, mind, and self-esteem to shreds. Because I needed that while being sick AND preggers, right?
Anyway, after many years and lots of work, I'm doing better. I have an excellent pain management therapist who has helped me to start dealing with some issues finally - poor guy probably thought he was helping before, but he didn't know what the issues were. Up until 3 weeks ago he'd never heard me swear, crack a dirty joke, laugh, or even talk about car audio. I think he truly thought I was the low-key, toned down, concervative, amish type of girl that sat on his couch each week. Once he realized there was something more, we both realized I'd lost myself somewhere in the void of being sick, isolated, and being told by Scott that NO ONE was ever going to want a gimpy woman with a kid at her side for a date, let alone a relationship.
Since that little breakthrough, I've been trying to have bigger breakthroughs. I've reconnected with people that used to make me smile. I've stopped avoiding a guy that kept asking me to get together on facebook whenever he was in town since- oh - early 2010. We went to school and church together as youth. Now he's doing great for himself in Seattle and I'm doing the best I can on the other side of the state, but he doesn't seem to be scared off by me. We talk daily, and I feel more like me than I'd even realized I'd lost in myself. I just feels good to laugh and be funny. And it gives me hope to know that maybe that happy person is coming out again. And while I'm not looking for a relationship with this guy, there's been some flirting, and I'm not opposed to it - who woulda known?
As far as my physical health goes, that's a battle. The migraines are doing better, by the grace of some wacky alternative physical therapy, but the sleep, the body pain, all the other issues are still a challengs. We did find out that my autonomic nervous system is totally haywire. I was firmly diagnosed with Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome and Autonomic Neuropathy, along with a few other things under that umbrella. That's why my resting heart rate has always been so high (sitting here right now it's 135) and my BP so low. It's also likely why It was so hard to treat my migraines- we were looking at my head for answers when the issue is the incorrect constriction of vessels due to the Dysautonomia. The weird heart rate should've been our clue, but it's rare so no one saw it. Currently, I'm doing PT, OT, Restorative Yoga, Water therapy, Pain management therapy, Saline infusions 2x a week, and on a spacial diet to try and resolve some of it, not to mention meds. Not a huge help yet, But at least it's an answer. And with answers come hope.
Plus I got Dragon for my computer so I can almost use it again. It's still rough going at times, but without it, I can't use it at all as typing is impossible.
So that's my update. Probably won't bring me around much more as going to the dr is like a full time job now, but I'm getting paid something through my work's long term disability leave, plus the state garnishes child support, much to Scott's disdain, and we're currently working on an SSDI claim. Sad to be only 30 and have to do that, but it happens.
I hope things are going okay for everyone that's left out there...
~Liz
PS- Omega, I may just get to spend some quality time at Vanderbilt in their Autonomic Dysfunction specialty area if the specialists up here don't start making progress soon. If it happens, I'll let you know. Wouldn't THAT be a crazy Flare reunion? Me, Omega, and his wife? Luvs it! ;-)
Oh - and for the Seattlites, my guy I've been talking to is over there. If it turns into something good, I may be over there more, too....
Here's a pic of my Nathan - 2 going on 20
Registered: Mar 1999
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WizArtist II
"How can you have a yellow alert in Spacedock? "
Member # 1425
posted
Liz, when I hear about dufus' like scott (little 's' intended) it makes me want to apply the "50 Cent Solution".
That is about the cost of a good .357 hollow point round. Idiots like that do not deserve a woman or to have a child and should be immediately removed from the gene pool. It is good that things are turning around for you and I hope that your life only gets better from this point on.
-------------------- There are 10 types of people in the world...those that understand Binary and those that don't.
Registered: Nov 2004
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), shitty work, shitty work and shitty work.![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
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I hope this board remains. A bastion of the old, uncomplicated internet. An elegant board for a more civilised age. 
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