I have a good friend Tim. Or maybe I sohuld say had... I loved him more than I've ever loved anyone else, and we shared more times together than most friends ever could. Through all the turmoil and angst we went through in life, we were there for eachother. When things were good, we supported eachother like no one else. Everything we did together was fun, meaningful, and fufilling. It truly was the best friendship I've ever had.
But something happened, and now it's gone... It's been gone for a long time-- like since May, when it all started to fall apart. But we've been hanging on, though it's not been pleasant. I thought we'd be able to fix it though... we HAD to! Friendships like ours can't just disintegrate overnight like that!
Or maybe they can. I lost Tim last night, and this time I lost him for good. And so I'm hurting. A lot. Because he's over here all the time hanging out with Lacey, but because of what has happened, I'm a stranger in my own house. I'm not welcome, so I may as well leave... and I did... last night at 4am I took off, and I haven't slept in over 36 hours now.........
It just hurts to lose someone like this. And I have no one I can really talk to... we have too many mutual friends, and I don't want to put anyone in the middle. So I'm sitting here, hurting, trying not to cry, and knowing that somewhere along the way it all fell apart, and I wasn't even paying close enough attention to see it coming.....
Maybe in the afterlife we'll be friends again, but maybe not..... maybe we weren't even destined to be friends to begin with..... but it was a great three years of my life, until it all ended......... thanks for letting me vent. I'll feel better after I get some sleep and after he goes back to school. TTYL.
~LOA
------------------
"Apprently, "pooty" involves deities and pretty girls in compromising positions..." ~TSN Jan. 18th, 2001
------------------
"Well if it's gonna be that kind of a party, I'm putting my dick in the mashed potatoes!"
-Nimrod 16/4/2001
------------------
"I never saw the TAS, there actually was sex on the bridge?"
- Matrix, 14/03/2001
------------------
"Goverment exists to serve, not to lead. We do not exist by its volition, it exists by ours. Bear that in mind when you insult your neighbors for refusing to bow before it." J. Richmond
They say that time heals all wounds, and I have to agree with that. It'll take time but you will pull through this just like you've been pulling through everything else that's been placed before you. What you need right now is to get things together and then sit down and give yourself time to heal.
I have a wide circle of friends. Many many times I have watched as two or more of my friends erupt at each other. Then they've come to me to vent, talk, and advising. It's been difficult, but these people so much to me that I force myself not to make anything a personal crusade. I'm writing this because you said you and Tim share mutual friends. If they are good friends, you can pour your heart out to them and not worry about judgement or condemnation. They will help you.
Try and find somewhere to stay for a while (friends, etc.). Try and get adjusted to your new environment and then spend some time with yourself. Cry. It never makes anything worse, and it helps you relieve a lot of your pent-up emotions. After that, find a friend and have a nice long talk. You have friends that will listen to you and offer support and compassion.
Above all else, remember that you will persevere. You are a very strong woman; you've been through things that probably would have left me dead by now. You are a good, decent person and what is happening now is not the end of the world, as much as it may seem. Tim and you may repair your friendship. If not, you will probably find someone who will be as close to you eventually as you were with Tim. I am definitely not the most religious or spiritual person here, but I know that you depend very much on yours. Use that and your friends are your support to get through this. You can do it.
If you need someone to talk, you have all us on the boards to listen to you and help you. My ICQ number is 3088026 and my email is [email protected] . Take care of yourself, and remember that you will make it through this.
Liz, I don't know you that well, but I'm also available as an impartial objective bounceboard & "blogboy;" my AIM name is in the profile.
I, too, would offer profound advice (probably from one soulbond or another), but I tend to ask questions that I'm sure you don't want to get into here.
Believe me, though, when I say I more than understand what you're going through...probably more than most people in "reality" & here.
------------------
"For people with resources, the right events happen. They may look like coincidences, but they arise out of necessity." --T�rk Hviid
------------------
I DO NOT ENJOY BOTH GENDERS!!!
Ultra Magnus
You're a person of deep faith who really wants to blow their car up.
But, seriously, best of luck with what you're dealing with.
------------------
Star Trek Gamma Quadrant
Average Rated 8.32 out of 10 Smileys by Fabrux (with <i>seven</i> eps posted)
***
"Oh, yes, screw logic, let's go for a theory with no evidence!"
-Omega 11:48am, Jan. 19th, 2001
****
And homeschooling also turns you into a socially well-adjusted person, capable of talking to people without them wanting to ram a f***ing chair down your throat! - PsyLiam, 3/11/01
Keep these two words close to you as close as I keep them close to Mark and I. "Faith Manages".
------------------
In this crazy world of lemons, baby...you're lemonade!
-Horatio G. Spafford, 1873
"Through many trials, toils and snares
I have already come;
'Twas grace that brought me safe thus far,
And grace will lead me home."
-John Newton, 1779
*HUG*
------------------
"Omega is right."
-Jeff Karrde, March 18, 2001 08:47 PM
:::points at sigline:::
------------------
"For people with resources, the right events happen. They may look like coincidences, but they arise out of necessity." --T�rk Hviid
A few weeks ago, I told a long-time friend how I felt about her. We'd lived together in first year as housemates, and kept in touch after she moved out. Last year, we began hanging out together in earnest, and I began fancying her, I never said anything, for fear of a) rejection, and b) ruining one of the best relationships I've had with a friend.
Things came to a head lately and I told her about my feelings. She had NO idea I felt like that, none whatsoever. A few days ago, she told me that she couldn't see us as anything but friends, nothing more. She's back now with a fellow she'd kinda been seeing on and off for the past few weeks (one of the reasons I'd cracked).
Funny thing is, most of the people I know thought that we'd either been together at one point, were going to get it on any minute now, or were going to hook up sometime in the not-so-distant future.
That is so off the cards now.
You have no idea of the rage I'm capable off. None. I was ready to lash out at anyone that looked crooked at me or crossed me. And not for the first time. I really am a danger to those I know sometimes, and there's no need for drink to be invovled either. This is all ME.
There's a ton more details (like how she used to tell me who she'd been "with", and I her) that I have no intention of getting into here.
Suffice it to say that I've lost one of my best friends, and perhaps one of the best chances I've ever had to be happy.
[ASIDE]
You know, this "talking about things" isn't all it's cracked up to be. I certainly don't feel better about spilling my guts out to you lot. All it's done is remind me of the loss I've suffered. 
Again, it's just me.
Liz, I dearly hope that getting all that stuff off your chest helped you in your situation. But running away from the problem won't help. Tell your room-mate what's up, and that seeing her with Tim is screwing you up big time - either she'll respect your wishes, and keep her distance from him, or else you'll know who your real friends are.
Christ on a bike, that sounds really reassuring, doesn't it!?
All I know is:
1.
There is no such thing as the prefect moment to do anything. Perfect moments happen by themselves.
2.
Time does heal.
That's all I need - time. I know that. valium wouldn't hurt though
Sl�inte. Hope we're of some help.
------------------
At that point, McDonald fired his gun three times in the air to emphasize his point. The crowd, estimated at 350,000, loudly cheered the new candidate.
"Let me make this clear: I am the law! I am your ruler! And you will have fries with that, motherf*cker!"
Anyway, thank you though... it's not nearly as bad now as it was in my tired state yesterday... plus I talked to some people last night and found some VERY unlikely support... (Whoo, life sure is strange!)
Guess what though? I had an aphrodesiac chocolate last night (don't ask....!) and it made me feel all weird... not horny, but like shaky and queasy... just thought I'd let ya know that....
Thanks again, folks, but I'll be fine.... I lost him, but I'm realizing that the REAL loss is on his part... and he'll realize that too, someday... Until then, i'm going to go out, have fun, and be the happy person I like to be!
~LOA
------------------
"Apprently, "pooty" involves deities and pretty girls in compromising positions..." ~TSN Jan. 18th, 2001
Let's go terrorize the men-folk here. Or there even!
------------------
In this crazy world of lemons, baby...you're lemonade!
------------------
"Goverment exists to serve, not to lead. We do not exist by its volition, it exists by ours. Bear that in mind when you insult your neighbors for refusing to bow before it." J. Richmond
------------------
"Well if it's gonna be that kind of a party, I'm putting my dick in the mashed potatoes!"
-Nimrod 16/4/2001
*annoyed*
------------------
In this crazy world of lemons, baby...you're lemonade!
------------------
"Apprently, "pooty" involves deities and pretty girls in compromising positions..." ~TSN Jan. 18th, 2001
But that can wait.
That sounded so nice what you said. Be the happy person you want to be. You sound like the type to pull it off, too.
Hmmmmm......
------------------
"Or maybe he was a real quack who got sick and tired of pissing people off, and decided to get a life and masterbate for the next 10 years."
- Me to Antagonist on Red Quacker, 03/08/01 20:15
My offer still stands if you still want to talk or anything. May things for you only get better now.
For yummy goodness.
------------------
In this crazy world of lemons, baby...you're lemonade!
------------------
never rub another man's rhubarb!
One a humorous side note, had I actually purchased this chocolate, it was priced at $.69...hehehe.... makes me giggle
~LOA
------------------
"Apprently, "pooty" involves deities and pretty girls in compromising positions..." ~TSN Jan. 18th, 2001
------------------
Not even a god can deny that I have squared the circle of a static Earth and cubed the Earth sphere by rotating it once to a dynamic Time or Life Cube.
--
Gene Ray
****
Read three (three!) chapters of "Dirk Tungsten in...The Disappearing Planet" Or don't. You know, whatever.
See, I haave these two gay friends who I love DEARLY named Brandon and Adam.... they're together and quite possibly the best couple EVER... anyway, Adam works at Castle Superstore, which is a HUGE porn store here in Spokane... and the other night Brandon and I went to dinner 'cause I wasn't feeling very happy, and then we went to visit Adam, and while there they made me try a chocolate.... But it didn't make me fel horny.... if that's what being horny is supposed to feel like, then the population of the Earth would be CONSIDERABLY smaller :-P
~LOA
------------------
"Apprently, "pooty" involves deities and pretty girls in compromising positions..." ~TSN Jan. 18th, 2001
------------------
In this crazy world of lemons, baby...you're lemonade!
quote:
To be entirely frank
(Groucho)
Why anyone would want to be frank is beyond me!!(?groucho)
------------------
I DO NOT ENJOY BOTH GENDERS!!!
Ultra Magnus
Different than Regular Frank. I think he's got powers.
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
------------------
In this crazy world of lemons, baby...you're lemonade!
------------------
"Well if it's gonna be that kind of a party, I'm putting my dick in the mashed potatoes!"
-Nimrod 16/4/2001
------------------
Frank's Home Page
"There are also the diphthongs ae and oe, with no English counterparts; Tolkien actually suggests substituting ai and oi if you don't care about such details...but anyone reading this document probably does care about the details." - Sindarin information
------------------
"...I know this board in secret, intimate ways which are beyond your comprehension.... Let's just say that people should *not* be telling me what to do; it should always be the other way around."
-"Red Quacker", conspiracy theorist and contemporary lunatic
If Brandon works in a hairdressers, then I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to go and start cleaning chimney's, Orion will have to start getting into lots of fights during football matches, and Gaseous Anomoly will have to start being drunk, and Tachy will have to be a twat.
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
Faith and begorrah, sure isn't it a grand soft day, yer honour!
Bags of coal? Ruined my life they did, the hoers...
What they didn't do to that poor man, in front of his wife and childers...the bastards...
There must be more to life,
Than Stereotypes
- Jarvis Cocker.
------------------
At that point, McDonald fired his gun three times in the air to emphasize his point. The crowd, estimated at 350,000, loudly cheered the new candidate.
"Let me make this clear: I am the law! I am your ruler! And you will have fries with that, motherf*cker!"
[This message has been edited by Gaseous Anomaly (edited March 24, 2001).]
Of course, I sweep the floor of the loading bay sometimes, also... And put the dirty dishes in the machine. And use hand lotion. Hmmm...
------------------
Don't kill me, I'm charming!
------------------
"Kif, I have made it with a woman! Inform the crew!"
- Zapp Brannigan
And may I just say for the record that I'm not just hurting - I'm really pissed off. I've been stuck in this library for the last four hours working on a couple of assignments with hand in dates of two weeks time, and less than a mile away, Bristol Rovers are playing Swindon Town - where there is the possibility of many lewd football chants followed by a good fight or two, AND I'M MISSING IT!. I'm only writing this during a little break between work. Grrrr
------------------
The Worlds Ten Greatest 'Fucks' #6
No fuckers gonna know - Richard Nixon
[This message has been edited by Orion Syndicate (edited March 24, 2001).]
------------------
"Kif, I have made it with a woman! Inform the crew!"
- Zapp Brannigan
------------------
At that point, McDonald fired his gun three times in the air to emphasize his point. The crowd, estimated at 350,000, loudly cheered the new candidate.
"Let me make this clear: I am the law! I am your ruler! And you will have fries with that, motherf*cker!"
------------------
Star Trek Gamma Quadrant
Average Rated 8.32 out of 10 Smileys by Fabrux (with seven eps posted)
***
"Oh, yes, screw logic, let's go for a theory with no evidence!"
-Omega 11:48am, Jan. 19th, 2001
------------------
Don't kill me, I'm charming!
What have you been doing?
------------------
"Or maybe he was a real quack who got sick and tired of pissing people off, and decided to get a life and masterbate for the next 10 years."
- Me to Antagonist on Red Quacker, 03/08/01 20:15
------------------
Don't kill me, I'm charming!
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
Hey, someone left some beer in this ashtray.
------------------
At that point, McDonald fired his gun three times in the air to emphasize his point. The crowd, estimated at 350,000, loudly cheered the new candidate.
"Let me make this clear: I am the law! I am your ruler! And you will have fries with that, motherf*cker!"
"When you scored a goal, why did you lot chase the goal scorer around the pitch and then jump on him? ALL OF YOU ARE GAYS AND LESBIANS! I HATE YOU!"
I do realise that the above was a little too well punctuated for him but never mind.
------------------
The Worlds Ten Greatest 'Fucks' #6
No fuckers gonna know - Richard Nixon
Robbie Fowler is a attacking player in red his top speed is 9.90998675 which increases when he is upgraded to England forward. In 2365 he will be upgraded with type-XIII addidas boots inproves his kicking power by more than a D'arsinesss Warbird with Litmanen torpedoes.
Swindon Rule!
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
Great Goal!!
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
*giggle*
You're all gays and PsyLiams!
------------------
"Kif, I have made it with a woman! Inform the crew!"
- Zapp Brannigan
*marathon*
*crunchie*
------------------
At that point, McDonald fired his gun three times in the air to emphasize his point. The crowd, estimated at 350,000, loudly cheered the new candidate.
"Let me make this clear: I am the law! I am your ruler! And you will have fries with that, motherf*cker!"
------------------
The Worlds Ten Greatest 'Fucks' #7
Watch him - he'll have some fuckers eye out! - King Harold
------------------
The Worlds Ten Greatest 'Fucks' #7
Watch him - he'll have some fuckers eye out! - King Harold
[This message has been edited by Orion Syndicate (edited March 26, 2001).]
------------------
Don't kill me, I'm charming!
------------------
The Worlds Ten Greatest 'Fucks' #7
Watch him - he'll have some fuckers eye out! - King Harold
------------------
"Kif, I have made it with a woman! Inform the crew!"
- Zapp Brannigan
------------------
The Worlds Ten Greatest 'Fucks' #7
Watch him - he'll have some fuckers eye out! - King Harold
------------------
"Kif, I have made it with a woman! Inform the crew!"
- Zapp Brannigan
What do you mean, I was always like this?
------------------
The Worlds Ten Greatest 'Fucks' #7
Watch him - he'll have some fuckers eye out! - King Harold
Orion's gonna be on the bad end of a hissey-fit now...
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
------------------
In this crazy world of lemons, baby...you're lemonade!
Redheads, though, ooooooooh...
------------------
Nic: She's not a practicing lesbian. We need PRACTICING lesbians!
Me: I have a camcorder.
Nic: But no lesbians.
Me: Ahhh... no.
Nic: DAMN IT MAN! WE NEED LESBIANS! LOTS AND LOTS OF LESBIANS!
ICQ Conversation From January 23, 2001.
------------------
"Well if it's gonna be that kind of a party, I'm putting my dick in the mashed potatoes!"
-Nimrod 16/4/2001
WHAT THE .,.? Nimrod, Infinity, I plan on beating the living daylights out of you both.
Does it occur to anyone that I'd rather not have to scroll down and read the same EXACT fucking thing eleven or how many times? I'm sure there are some others here who feel the same way, but I just realized I'm going to have to buy new checks, so I'm kinda pissed and taking it out on you so tough luck and deal with it.
Go to the fucking TrekBBS for that bullshit. It's one thing when someone ACCIDENTLY posts something more than once, but on purpose? ARGGGHHHH! Can a mod or admin come in and clean these triple-triple- posts up, please?
------------------
Star Trek Gamma Quadrant
Average Rated 8.32 out of 10 Smileys by Fabrux (with seven eps posted)
***
"Oh, yes, screw logic, let's go for a theory with no evidence!"
-Omega 11:48am, Jan. 19th, 2001
[This message has been edited by JeffKardde (edited March 26, 2001).]
------------------
Don't kill me, I'm charming!
Infinity11: You little turnip you sat there and counted juuust so you'd beat me by a factor of one. 
------------------
Don't kill me, I'm charming!
It was either that or I made a Man Train out of them.
------------------
In this crazy world of lemons, baby...you're lemonade!
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
This is not a common occurrence, and I pray it never will be. Besides, it only works once, so drop it. This is a brand new shirt!
------------------
Don't kill me, I'm charming!
------------------
"Well if it's gonna be that kind of a party, I'm putting my dick in the mashed potatoes!"
-Nimrod 16/4/2001
And how did we get to this anyway? I want to go back to Lee being a natural ginger.
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
FUCK YOU, FUCKING FUCK!
"The important thing is never..."
SUCK IT DOWN BITCH!
"Only the suppressed word..."
JUMP UP MY BUTT!
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
Off our meds again today?
And if Lee is Ginger, then that would make Liam...Gilligan? Oh, the possibillities!
------------------
In this crazy world of lemons, baby...you're lemonade!
*sigh*
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
------------------
"Well if it's gonna be that kind of a party, I'm putting my dick in the mashed potatoes!"
-Nimrod 16/4/2001
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
Okay, not as meaningful as "Fuck, shit, cunt!" or some such, but I had to go w/ the quote...
------------------
"As part of Mr. Lee's good neighbor policy, all Rat Things are programmed never to break the sound barrier in a populated area. But Fido's in too much of a hurry to worry about the good neighbor policy. Jack the sound barrier. Bring the noise."
-Neal Stephenson, Snow Crash
[This message has been edited by TSN (edited March 26, 2001).]
On that subject, when Bart runs down the stairs, what does he say? On my copy, it's "crap boobs crap", but it sounds edited, as if they took the crap, and resued it to replace another word. But I can't imagine what they'd use that's ruder than crap. Unless it's that Sky censor who has a bizaire hatred of the word "ass" at work...
------------------
You know, when Comedy Central asked us to do a Thanksgiving episode, the first thought that went through my mind was, "Boy, I'd like to have sex with Jennifer Aniston."
-Trey Parker, co-creator of South Park
Go fig, huh?
------------------
In this crazy world of lemons, baby...you're lemonade!
------------------
Not even a god can deny that I have squared the circle of a static Earth and cubed the Earth sphere by rotating it once to a dynamic Time or Life Cube.
--
Gene Ray
****
Read three (three!) chapters of "Dirk Tungsten in...The Disappearing Planet" Or don't. You know, whatever.
Great Pun!!
------------------
"Instructed by history and reflection, Julian was persuaded that, if the diseases of the body may sometimes be cured by salutary violence, neither steel nor fire can eradicate the erroneous opinions of the mind."
-Edward Gibbons, The Decline and Fall of The Roman Empire.
[This message has been edited by Ultra Magnus (edited March 27, 2001).]