I didn't write it, but I it found worthy of posting:
THE "FORWARDER'S" 12 STEP PROGRAM - EVERYONE SAY IT WITH ME ...
1. I will NOT get bad luck, lose my friends, or lose my mailing lists if I DON'T forward a fucking email.
2. I will NOT hear any music or see a taco dog, if I do forward a fucking e-mail.
3. Bill Gates is NOT going to send me money, Victoria Secret doesn't know anything about a gift certificate they're supposed to send me.
4. Ford will NOT give me a 50% discount even if I forward my e-mail to more than 50 people who are obviously as fucking stupid as me.
5. I will NEVER receive gift certificates, coupons, or freebies from Coca Cola, Cracker Barrel, Old Navy, or anyone else if I send an e-mail to 10 people.
6. I will NEVER see a pop-up window if I forward an e-mail ... NEVER -- NEVER.
7. There is NO SUCH THING as an e-mail tracking program, and I am not STUPID enough to think that someone will send me $100 for forwarding an e-mail to 10 or more people who are as fucking stupid as I am.
8. There is NO kid with cancer through the Make-a-Wish program in England collecting anything! He did when he was 7 years old. He is now cancer free and 35 years old and DOESN'T WANT ANY MORE OF YOUR FUCKING POST CARDS, or GET-WELL CARDS.
9. The government does not have a bill in Congress called 901B (or whatever they named it this week) that, if passed, will enable them to charge us 5 cents for every fucking e-mail we send.
10. There will be NO cool dancing, singing, waving, clorful flowers, characters, or program that I will rceive immediately after I forward an e-mail. NONE, ZIP, ZERO, NADA!!
11. The American Red Cross will NOT donate 50 cents to certain individual dying of some never-heard-of disease for every e-mail address I send this to. The American Red Cross RECEIVES donations.
12. And finally, I WILL NOT let others guilt me into sending things by telling me I am not their friend or that I don't believe in Jesus Christ. If God wants to send me a message, I believe the bushes in my yard will burn before he picks up a fucking keyboard to pass it on.
Now, repeat this to yourself until you have it memorized, and send it along to at least 5 of your friends before the next full moon or you will surely be constipated for the next three months and all of your hair will fucking fall out!
Just Kidding...
Posted by Malnurtured Snay (Member # 411) on :
Hey, MIB, you might want to read this ...
Posted by The359 (Member # 37) on :
quote:Originally posted by thoughtcriminal84: 12. And finally, I WILL NOT let others guilt me into sending things by telling me I am not their friend or that I don't believe in Jesus Christ