Flare Sci-Fi Forums: The War Between the Sexes: First Strike

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Posted by Jaresh Inyo on :

(I didn't feel like waiting for three females to respond to Baloo so I could then maybe post this. I've been holding it inside for three years, and that's long enough.)

Why didn't you accept me? I tried to so hard to be anything you could ever want. I took an interest in thing that didn't interest me, I tried to learn about your culture and your family, I befriended your friends, even though I didn't like them.

I tried to help you in everyway I could. I angered my friends because I was so focused on you, I made enemies when people bad mouthed you. I thought about you all day and dreaming about you at night. When I came to school every morning I was vaguely nervous until I saw that you were there. And I was unhappy when you weren't'

I tried to be everything that you could ever want. I focused on you, I talked about you and wrote about you, I even created a character for you in my Star Trek series. I went to my sister's dance competitions on the off chance that I might see you there.

Why, after three years, did you have to fall for Rob? Why couldn't you at least have choosen someone nice, someone who wanted you because of who you are, not because he liked your body?

Why wasn't I good enough?

Fuck...

Posted by Feste on :

Well, Jaresh, there are two hard things to accept:

1. You can't make somebody love you back no matter how much you love them.

2. All your love can't make somebody live if they're determined to die.

*cue Patsy Cline album*

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"'I'm afraid there's nowhere for you to sit,' I said coldly; 'the verandah is full of goats.'" --Saki "The Guests"

Posted by Jeff Raven (Member # 20) on :

*knows #1 really well*

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"I do whatever the voice of Charles Capps tells me to do."

Posted by bryce (Member # 42) on :

Jaresh, the truth is she wasn't good enough for you and did you a favor by leaving you. If she doesn't want a nice guy and is so immature that she feels better with a jerk, that's her problem.

Find someone else mature enough to know what she has with you.

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It's all about the Pentiums, Baby!

Posted by LOA (Member # 49) on :

Sad Fact of Lfe #1:

Women are almost ALWAYS attracted to the jerks in life.

We don't know why, we don't even know we're DOING until afterwards.... but women are almost ALWAYS attracted to the jeks in their life before the nice guys..... it's really sad and annoying, but i can totally attest to it's validity....

I'm sorry about your situation though... just keep in mind that things WILL get better from here... they always get better...

~LOA

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"Show us the lost and dying world
Remove the scales from our eyes
And as we go through all the earth
May our hearts weep for our lives..." FOM '99

Posted by RW (Member # 27) on :

Hey, I'm a jerk. No women though.

Posted by Jubilee (Member # 99) on :

No, bryce, that is not necessarily true. Just because she didn't want Jaresh doesn't mean she was being immature. The truth is that women are just plain hard to figure out. *LOL* .....

The fact is, that no matter how hard you try, and how hard you work, if it wasn't meant to be it wasn't meant to be. You can't make her love you, and no amount of work is going to change that.

I'm sorry that this hurts.... I know it does, because I experienced it for almost a year myself. But that's the way of things. I'm sure you'll find someone out there who is going to see how wonderful you are, and want you, and love you in return.... Sometimes it just takes a little time.

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"Angels, answer me,
are you near if rain should fall?
Am I to believe
you will rise to calm the storm?
For so great a treasure words will never do.
Surely, if this is, promises are mine to give you.
mine to give........ "
~ Enya

Posted by bryce (Member # 42) on :

No, if she is actracted to guys that treat her bad then she is immature.

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It's all about the Pentiums, Baby!

[This message has been edited by bryce (edited July 25, 1999).]

Posted by Jaresh Inyo on :

He doesn't treat her bad, but I was his friend and he told me his true intent.

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Josh: I think they're getting to know each other a bit too well, if you catch my drift.
Me: Oh, I agree. I think they're spending too much time together, that is of course, if you catch my drift.
Asher: I think he's *ucking her, and he's cheating on his wife, and he's risking his marriage, and if his wife finds out about it she'll leave him and take their son, and his life will be ruined. If you catch my drift...

Posted by bryce (Member # 42) on :

OK

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It's all about the Pentiums, Baby!

Posted by Saltah'na (Member # 33) on :

I know how you feel Jaresh. I have suffered through the same situation for three years. I'd like to bring up a quote that my friend gave me which has been on my mind for those same three years:

"Good guys always finish last"

This means that the nice caring guys, who have nothing much to offer to a woman except someone who is caring, compassionate, understanding, etc, etc, almost NEVER gets the girls. Meanwhile, the guys who have the money, the car, the cellphone, and everything else BUT a great personality seems to be a huge magnet for them. It got so bad for me that I asked myself if I was going to stay forever single or something.

For three years before I met my present gf, I have struggled with trying to find someone to be with. During those years, I have met many nice girls, but all of them seemed to avoid me like the plague and go for someone I once or still know. It came to be such that every girl I would meet I would instantly set her up with someone else because I knew that there are a negative-infinity chance that I could spend many happy years with her.

I guess you could say that my struggles are over. I have been going out with my present gf for almost 1 2/3 years now, and frankly, she is almost everything I want her to be. One tip for all those single people: do not expect to find someone who is 100% to your expectations. Nobody's perfect.

Bottom line, Jaresh, it will take some time to find someone who would want to stay with you for a very long time. For some people, it may take weeks, but for others, it may take your entire life. And when you do, those problems you had will be nothing but a long-ago memory.

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I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation

[This message has been edited by Tahna Los (edited July 25, 1999).]

Posted by Kosh (Member # 167) on :

Been there. Flowers, brownies poems. Roses on Valetines day. eveything but begged. Never beg. I let it go after a while. I'm still attracked to her, but I don't ask her out anymore. To many other girls out there.

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WHO ARE YOU?

Posted by Jaresh Inyo on :

That's pretty much the same as me, Kosh. Anyway, thanks all, you're all great. If anyone else would like to begin whining now, you have my permission. I've taken enough time, since this wasn't what Baloo had in mind.

Posted by Jubilee (Member # 99) on :

Not all women are attracted to men with money, and a car, and etc, etc, etc.....

I only go after men with a good personality, and I dont' give to craps about all that other stuff.

Posted by Baloo (Member # 5) on :

I would like to chime in with my own opinion at this time.

Women often, but not invariably, seem to have the psychic ability to choose the one man who is screwed up exactly to her specifications. I'm pretty sure men also have this ability, but the bottom line is that the "walks-all-over-them" types seem to have no difficulty finding the doormats.

This is distressing.

And just an observation.

--Baloo

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Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else; this is not advice, it is merely custom.
-- MARK TWAIN
www.geocities.com/Area51/Shire/8641/

Posted by Cargile (Member # 45) on :

Jarysh

Mistake Number One: You were not yourself. You engaged in things that you really did care for just to gain the attention of this young lady. Always be yourself. Experience and accumulated knowledge will change you. If someone doesn't like you for who you are, then they will never be good enough for you.

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"What is that? A tank?"
--Our Lord and Savior David Koresh, the Second Coming snuffed out before He could any good.

Posted by Diane (Member # 53) on :

Odd. I'm nothing like the normal teenage female and I still don't get a guy. I think you're trying too hard, Jarish, but whatever I say isn't gonna help, so I'll just save it. Some people are just like that. One day in school I overheard one girl talking to another.

"Just get everything you want then dump him."

I felt like punching her in the face.

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"I would be delighted to offer any advice I can on understanding women. When I have some, I'll let you know."
--Picard to Data, "In Theory"

Posted by Jaresh Inyo on :

Actually, since then I've lost all ability to be embarrassed. I am extremely true to myself, since I no longer worry about much. It's a true liberation to say whatever you think. *LOL*

Posted by Saiyanman Benjita (Member # 122) on :

Cheer up, Jaresh. Just because you haven't found the ONE yet, it doesn't mean that you won't. Who knows, somewhere down the line you'll find someone. (It took me 20 years to find someone)

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I'll get you for this Gadget!!!! MEEEEE-ROWWRRRR.

Posted by Saltah'na (Member # 33) on :

Some unfortunate guy wanted to go out with a girl in his class. He asked her out.

She asked him: Do you have a car?

He said: No.

She said: Come back when you have one.

That explains my gripe. End of story.

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I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation

Posted by Jeff Raven (Member # 20) on :

You touched my soul.
You Let the light of your heart enter mine.
Lifting me from this eternal night,
I embraced your warmth around me.
When I looked in your eyes,
I knew that I loved you.
I became entangled, I couldn't get away.
But it changed...Your love was not as mine.
Cut off, broken loose,
It ached.
I return to my waiting,
Once again cold,
Once again alone.

Alas, I am sure, it is better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all...

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"I do whatever the voice of Charles Capps tells me to do."

Posted by Baloo (Member # 5) on :

At least that way you'll have that much more in common with the rest of humanity.

How come a potential means of personal growth and source of nurturing is such a hotbed of acrimony?

--Baloo

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Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else; this is not advice, it is merely custom.
-- MARK TWAIN
www.geocities.com/Area51/Shire/8641/

Posted by Warped1701 (Member # 40) on :

I think the way I feel about that particular subject is best expressed by a quote, from all places, 'Men in Black'.

quote:
J: Well, like Shakespeare said, "Tis better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all."
K: Try it sometime.

At least, that's the way I see it.

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"I see you have the ring. And that your Schwartz is as big as mine!
-Dark Helmet, Spaceballs

Posted by Diane (Member # 53) on :

That's the way I see it, too.

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"I would be delighted to offer any advice I can on understanding women. When I have some, I'll let you know."
--Picard to Data, "In Theory"

Posted by Saiyanman Benjita (Member # 122) on :

Oh, that is true. But someday, if you try hard enough, you may get that love back, or something better.

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I'll get you for this Gadget!!!! MEEEEE-ROWWRRRR.

Posted by Diane (Member # 53) on :

Well, it doesn't always work that way. Sometimes you don't want the person back but it's hard to let go. Confusing, isn't it?

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"I would be delighted to offer any advice I can on understanding women. When I have some, I'll let you know."
--Picard to Data, "In Theory"

Posted by Jedi Weyoun (Member # 110) on :

*sigh*

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"Fear attracts the fearful"
([[[[[[*]}��

Posted by Saiyanman Benjita (Member # 122) on :

I completely understand, Tora.

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Saving the world: $50.
Saving the universe: $1,000,000
Saving your marraige: Sorry, I don't do that.