Flare Sci-Fi Forums: Now that Camapign 2000 is upon us...

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Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

I offer sites for some to the canidates:

George W. Bush

Hypocrisy with Bravado ~Drug Free Since 1974!

Little George Bush ~"I propose that every city have a telephone number 119 - for dyslexics who have an emergency."

George W. Bush Campaign Headquarters ~'I've learned from mistakes I may or may not have made.'"

Bush Lite ~"A pale, watered-down version of the palest, most watered-down occupant of the White House since Millard Fillmore."

Al Gore

All Gore ~Helped fund a Government subsidy to chalk producers.

No Gore 2000 ~The Dark Sequel To The Clinton Legacy.

Al Bore ~"For NASA, space is still a high priority." Vice President Al Gore, 9/5/93

Al Gore-2000 ~Why I support Al Gore by Shaquille O'Neal!!!

Pat Buchanan

Patrick Buchanan -- In His Own Words ~"There is nothing wrong with us sitting down and arguing that issue that we are a European country."

GO, PAT, GO AWAY ~Back by popular demand!

Help Wanted - Join the Buchanan Brigade! ~Unskilled immigrant labor wanted to help wall off America. Low Wages - No Benefits - Mean spirited management - Apply in person only

Steve Forbes

The golden platform ~"The Best Government Money Can Buy (for $440 million)"

Elizabeth Dole

Put a Leader in the White House ~We need a First Dog!

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What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man?
~C. Mongomery Burns

Posted by Montgomery (Member # 23) on :

Oh boy, you guys are really screwed no matter who you pick!

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"FOOLS! Will I have to kill them ALL?!?!"

Posted by Jeff Raven (Member # 20) on :

Hey! There's no page for Bill Bradley!

I suppose that's a good, thing, eh?

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"I'm looking for someone to change my life.
I'm looking for a miracle in my life.
And if you could see, what its done to me...
To lose the love I knew, could safely lead me to
The land that I one knew...
To learn as we grow old, the secrets of our souls."
Question, The Moody Blues

Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :

It's always the least of evils, when you get down to it. No one's going to do a good job, so you just have to pick who will do least badly. In the final campaign between Bush, Bradley, and Perot (I still say he'll get the reform party nomination), I'd go for Bush.

Of course, that's just because I can't run yet. Vote for me in 2020, everyone!

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"I consider the foundation of the Constitution as laid on this ground: That "all powers not delegated to the United States, by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States or to the people . . ." To take a single step beyond the boundaries thus specially drawn around the powers of Congress is to take possession of a boundless field of power, no longer susceptible of any definition."
- Thomas Jefferson to George Washington, 1791

Posted by HMS White Star (Member # 174) on :

Omega somehow I don't think you would get many votes from the folks at this forum (alright since some of the people don't live in the US that might explain some of it, but...).

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Step 1: Become a senior member,
Step 2: ?,
Step 3: Global Domination

Posted by RW (Member # 27) on :

See folks? Clinton isn't so bad after all. :]

Posted by Chimaera on :

All of a sudden Canadian politics is looking pretty good

It's really a shame in democracy today that just about everyone who would make a good national leader is either unelectable (because they're boring or otherwise uncharismatic) or simply not willing to put up with all the BS.

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"But, it was so artistically done."
-Grand Admiral Thrawn

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

Sorry, I couldn't find a Bill Bradley parody page in my all too brief search. Perhaps in a couple of weeks as he grows stronger someone will put one up.

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What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man?
~C. Mongomery Burns

[This message has been edited by Jay (edited October 14, 1999).]

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

It's too bad that the great Dan Quayle dropped out already. Oh, there is much Quayle fodder out there. Nevertheless, just for fun I offer you:

Dan Quayle in His Own Words ~"Verbosity leads to unclear, inarticulate things."

Dan Quayle for Pope in 2000 ~He's honest. He's reliable. He's got a nice round head.

The QuaYle2k problem ~Legacy: Most now spell 'potato' correctly

Top Ten Lists That are About or Mention Former Vice President Dan Quayle ~Who can beat Letterman?

Oh, that was fun!!

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What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man?
~C. Mongomery Burns

Posted by Baloo (Member # 5) on :

What really chaps my hide is the fact that the people who are asking about drug use couldn't honestly answer the same question themselves without getting some flack.

--Baloo

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My mind wanders, but don't worry. It's weak and can't get very far.
--Steve Allen
www.geocities.com/Area51/Shire/8641/

Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :

What annoys me is that the people asking Bush if he's used drugs are the same people that were saying that it was irrelevant whether der Shliekmeister (AKA Clinton) had or not.

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

Dang, ain't hypocrisy wonderful!

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What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man?
~C. Mongomery Burns

[This message has been edited by Jay (edited October 14, 1999).]

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

Oh, and FYI...Gore and Bradley have already admitted that they smoked pot in the 60's. And what, George W. is still obfuscates. Not that that should be an issue anyway.

Oh, this is going to be a fun election as we watch the leader of Republican family values go through a messy divorce after screwing someone other than his wife. Yup, the Newt-ster is going through some legal wrangling to see if he mustanswer the question, posed by his wife, if he subverted his family values platform while mucking around with other women.

WEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!

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What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man?
~C. Mongomery Burns

Posted by Xentrick (Member # 64) on :

RW, if you want Billy Jeff Clinton, you're welcome to him.

After 6.5 years, and well over another year of Clinton fatigue ahead, some of us were hoping for a real breath of fresh air for 2000.

Algore, Bush, Bradley, Dole, McCain, Trump, Forbes, and bloody RossPerot back from whatever rock he crawled under after the *last* election..... All a bunch of suits, lawyers, and attention-starved egotists. Most political photo-ops, you could cut&paste another candidate's face over the speaker and never notice the difference.

Times like this, I wish the space aliens would hurry up and get here.

Posted by HMS White Star (Member # 174) on :

Of course since Newt no longer has a political office, I don't see how that has any bearing to the Republican party.

Jay said "Dang, ain't hypocrisy wonderful!"

Be careful there, that what the Republicans said about the independent council law after Ken Starr .

My guess is that Bush perhaps did some heavier stuff than pot, perhaps stuff that would have put him in jail for a long time. But alway I never thought drug use is a big deal, it really is more toward scaring parents "O he was a druggie, so he will support drugs" or some sh*t like that.

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Step 1: Become a senior member,
Step 2: ?,
Step 3: Global Domination

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

Xentrick, that reminds me of The Simpsons episode "Treehouse of Horror VII".

Kodos: I am Clin-Ton. As overlord, all will kneel trembling before me and obey my brutal commands. End communication.

Kent: Senator Dole, why should people vote for you instead of President Clinton?

Kang: It makes no difference which one of us you vote for. Either way, your planet is doomed. DOOMED!

Kang: Fooling these Earth voters is easier than expected.

Kodos: Yes. All they want to hear are bland pleasantries embellished by an occasional saxophone solo or infant kiss.

George Stephanopoulos: Uh, Mr. President, Sir. People are becoming a bit... confused by the way your and your opponent are, well, constantly holding hands.

Kang: We are merely exchanging long protein strings. If you can think of a simpler way, I'd like to hear it.

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What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man?
~C. Mongomery Burns

[This message has been edited by Jay (edited October 14, 1999).]

Posted by Charles Capps (Member # 9) on :

quote:
Kodos: I am Clin-Ton. As overlord, all will kneel trembling before me and obey my brutal commands. End communication.

Hmm, foreshadowing?

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Avon: "You really do believe in taking risks, don't you?"
Tarrant: "Calculated risks."
Avon: "Calculated on what? Your fingers?"
-- Blake's Seven, Ultraworld

Posted by First of Two (Member # 16) on :

I just wanna say that the First of Two for Dictator in 2008 capaign is still going strong and gathering momentum.

I suppose its time for a few new campaign promises.

If I am elected, Omega will never become president. We'll be deporting all the young-earth creationists to Iran.

I'll be investing heavily in a mission to land a manned mision on Mars by 2025.

HMO'S will be forbidden to deny treatments which are submitted as medically necessary by two or more doctors.

"Comparative Religion" courses will be promoted in public schools. No bias may be shown. Special attention will be given to the "Ideals vs. Actions" Unit. (this should scare a few Fundies)

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'In every country and in every age the priest has been hostile to Liberty; he is always in allegiance to the despot, abetting his abuses in return for protection of his own." ---- Thomas Jefferson

Posted by HMS White Star (Member # 174) on :

Future Dictator First a few questions please,

"HMO'S will be forbidden to deny treatments which are submitted as medically necessary by two or more
doctors."

If 2 doctors say the treatment for thoses with a fear of crowds is the purchase of automatic weapons .

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Step 1: Become a senior member,
Step 2: ?,
Step 3: Global Domination

[This message has been edited by HMS White Star (edited October 16, 1999).]

Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :

If you were elected, I'd move to Iran voluntarily. : )

Here's an idea for some fun. How about an election? We could have a nice little presidential race right here. You up for it, 1 'o 2?

Posted by Aethelwer (Member # 36) on :

Ooh! That's a nifty idea, actually.

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Frank's Home Page
"Don't worry; in Season Two we abandon it for 'I Am A Sock-Puppet!'" - Bob Skir

Posted by First of Two (Member # 16) on :

sounds interesting. Perhaps even... fun.

Should probably set some ground rules, though. Issues, Debates, who gets to ask the questions, and so forth.
(Let's put that Moderator to work Moderatin' already!)

Who wants to be a spin doctor?
How about a Forum Political Commentator?

I love political interpreters after speeches... "What Candidate Bush MEANT when he said 'I don't think anybody who doesn't believe in God should be considered a citizen' was..."

The only problem is that this could lead to "camps" developing, and the Forum really doesn't need that. So we'd have to set rules on that, too. Maybe somebody can drag out my old post on keeping fights civil?

Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :

OK, here are my suggestions. All titles (as well as everything else here) are just that: suggestions.

As for the process for choosing the Supreme Impartial Arbitor, if all cantidates agree on one person, and that person is willing, then that person shall become Arbitor. Said arbitor shall tally up the votes, decide whether questions are irrelevant or not, set details (like how long the election lasts, when all votes are considered in, etc.), and to appoint media positions, such as Grand Inquisitor.

I nominate Charles Capps as Supreme Impartial Arbitor.

NO spindoctors or advisors within the Forums. We don't have a big enough voting population to divvy up into camps. Advisors in the real world are OK.

No irrelevant questions about things like previous drug use. : )

This is a debate over national politics, and an election for the office of President of the United States. Just making sure we're clear on everything.

Other people are allowed to run if they so choose.

No taking campaign money from the Chinese in exchange for Forum nuclear secrets. : )

As for format, I'd suggest that this election take on the form of multiple threads in various portions of the Community Forums, with the main thread in "Forum Contests".

Of course, if Charles is agreed upon as nominee, and he accepts the position, he gets to make all decisions, regardless of what we agree upon! : )

Oh, and a final suggestion for prize if elected: the official (but, of course, meaningless) title of "President of the Flare Forums". I'd also like my status kicked up to Senior Member if I win (if possible, of course, and assuming I haven't reached that status by then).

Any disagreements or other suggestions, 1of2?

Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :

Nuclear secrets? Screw that! We've got the original designs for the Genesis Device locked up in the Behaviour Vault. We've got Strong Force disruptors, we've got Gluon Manipulators, we've got relativistic bombs, nanomech assassins, and cyborg H-K's. We've got knives, rocks, and sharpened sticks!

*ahem*

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"Quadrilateral I was, now I warp like a smile."
--
Soul Coughing

Posted by Aethelwer (Member # 36) on :

BTW, I can write a Perl script to automate the voting.

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Frank's Home Page
"Don't worry; in Season Two we abandon it for 'I Am A Sock-Puppet!'" - Bob Skir

Posted by First of Two (Member # 16) on :

"As for the process for choosing the Supreme Impartial Arbitor, if all cantidates agreeon one person, and that person is willing, then that person shall become Arbitor. Saidarbitor shall tally up the votes, decide whether questions are irrelevant or not, set details (like how long the election lasts, when all votes are considered in, etc.), and to appoint media positions, such as Grand Inquisitor.

I nominate Charles Capps as Supreme Impartial Arbitor."

Agreed, provided he's not too busy. Otherwise, I nominate Tom, as he IS the moderator here.

"NO spindoctors or advisors within the Forums. We don't have a big enough voting population to divvy up into camps. Advisors in the real world are OK."

All right. But if you don't think a population this small can divide into camps... where did you go to school?

"No irrelevant questions about things like previous drug use. : )"

Well, I, for one, think character questions ARE important, one of the reasons I'm voting "none of the above" in the real world. And my drug experience doesn't go farther than alcohol. For the record.

"This is a debate over national politics, and an election for the office of President of the United States. Just making sure we're clear on everything."

Okay, so real issues. No "Who would you pick as First Lady?" questions.

"Other people are allowed to run if they so choose."

The more, the merrier. Does this mean we have Primaries? I hope not.

"No taking campaign money from the Chinese in exchange for Forum nuclear secrets. : )"

How about taking campaign money in exchange for the secrets of my mom's pumpkin cake recepie?

"As for format, I'd suggest that this election take on the form of multiple threads in various portions of the Community Forums, with the main thread in "Forum Contests"."

That could take a while. Should we start with a basic declaration of principles, (Pro this, Anti that..) or wait to be asked about them (like the real candidates do)?

"Of course, if Charles is agreed upon as nominee, and he accepts the position, he gets to make all decisions, regardless of what we agree upon!"

The Electoral Capps? Hm. Alright.

Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :

"Agreed, provided he's not too busy. Otherwise, I nominate Tom, as he IS the moderator here."

Agreed. Charles?

"But if you don't think a population this small can divide into camps... where did you go to school? "

I just meant that if we each have half a dozen or so people advising us, there won't be many real observers left. Oh, and to answer your question: homeschooled.
: )

"Well, I, for one, think character questions ARE important, one of the reasons I'm voting "none of the above" in the real world. And my drug experience doesn't go farther than alcohol. For the record."

OK, how about we can be asked, but all information given is voluntary?

"Does this mean we have Primaries? I hope not."

No. No parties.

"How about taking campaign money in exchange for the secrets of my mom's pumpkin cake recepie?"

OK, no taking campaign money in exchange for anything pertaining to radioactive material. : )

"Should we start with a basic declaration of principles, (Pro this, Anti that..) or wait to be asked about them (like the real candidates do)?"

I think I'd like to wait until asked, but it's not that important to me.

Do you think we could get Charles to let us post a notice of the election in the other Forums? There might be people that read the Trek ones, but not these. I did that for a while when I first got here.

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

Where do I vote for none of the above.

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What good is money if it can't inspire terror in your fellow man?
~C. Mongomery Burns

Posted by Curry Monster (Member # 12) on :

I suggest we all vote for Frank. How does supreme ruler of the universe sound O Mac'ish one?

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"Diplomacy is the art of Internationalising an issue to your advantage"

Field Marshal Military Project
http://fieldmarshal.virtualave.net

Posted by Elim Garak (Member # 14) on :

But then he would force us to all become Mac Evangelists.

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Elim Garak: "Oh, it's just Garak. Plain, simple Garak. Now, good day to you, Doctor. I'm so glad to have made such an... interesting new friend today." (DS9: "Past Prologue")

Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :

A third party cantidate? Sure, go ahead and throw your vote away. : )

Posted by Aethelwer (Member # 36) on :

LOL...nah, I'd rather become supreme ruler of the universe by conquest.

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Frank's Home Page
"Don't worry; in Season Two we abandon it for 'I Am A Sock-Puppet!'" - Bob Skir

Posted by Feste on :

Does this mean more 100 million word debates re the origin of life, the existence of God and the wickedness of homosexuals? If so, this should be almost as riveting as the annual Senate Agricultural Committee's report on wheat blight.

Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :

No, personal beliefs are irrelevant. Only political issues.

Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :

Ok, I was enjoying this, but you folks do realize that there are a sizable number of posters here who are not Americans and could not care in the slightest about U.S. internal politics?

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"Quadrilateral I was, now I warp like a smile."
--
Soul Coughing

Posted by HMS White Star (Member # 174) on :

Yes that's true, and there is a sizable number of American's who don't care about American internal politics either

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Pinky we will so rule the world...as soon as I figure out what step 2 is.

Posted by Feste on :

I'm shocked you don't care about American wheat blight.

Posted by Curry Monster (Member # 12) on :

How can one not care about America? Where is the western world going? Nooooooo!!!!

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"Diplomacy is the art of Internationalising an issue to your advantage"

Field Marshal Military Project
http://fieldmarshal.virtualave.net

Posted by RW (Member # 27) on :

Hey, I care about US internal politics. It's so amusing to watch, so bipolar.

Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :

*wonders if Charles is ever going to get his butt down here to accept or decline his nomination*

Should we just forget him and nominate Tom?

Posted by Elim Garak (Member # 14) on :

I agree with Sol. For the non-U.S. citizen, this thread can be very... dulll.

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Elim Garak: "Oh, it's just Garak. Plain, simple Garak. Now, good day to you, Doctor. I'm so glad to have made such an... interesting new friend today." (DS9: "Past Prologue")

Posted by Omega (Member # 91) on :

So should we just call the whole thing off, then, or what?

Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :

But this thread gives everyone the chance to mock American politics.

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The watchdog of public safety, is there any lower form of life?
~C. Mongomery Burns