T O P I C ��� R E V I E W
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The First One
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Right! You've had it easy for a while, but I'm in a MEAN mood tonight, so no more Mr. Nice Guy. . .Yes, it's time for all you young folk to test your mettle on some Classic Trek! Over in alt.binaries.startrek some sad git has been posting vidcaps from all the episodes, and I've earmarked a few for future use. Here come five (well, four and one other) of the best. First off, What on earth. . ?
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The Vorlon
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Spock: *melds with computer* "Numbers... Endless Numbers... Too many Numbers..."Computer: "I have performed an illegal operation and will now shut down." Spock: "You... Will... Not... Crash... You are not a Microsoft product, you are Nomad! I mean, you're... Bob!" ------------------ Lyta Vorlon: "Our great mistake. Our failing. And now your failing. The error is compounded." Delenn: "What mistake?" Lyta Vorlon: "The first one, the one from which all mistakes proceed: The error of Pride..." -- Kalesh Naranek, Last of the Vorlon www.orc.ca/~jheinbuc/
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Ryan McReynolds
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Spock: Spock to Captain Kirk.Kirk: Kirk here, go ahead. Spock: We are prepared for your weekly full body cavity search, Captain. Please report to the bondage chamb-- I mean, the interrogation room immediately. ------------------ -=Ryan McReynolds=-
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Sol System
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Spock: "First officer's log, stardate 4708.1. With time growing short, I have decided to test the cure on myself.""First officer's log, stardate 4708.3. The cure is working, though there are some minor side effects. My hair appears to have turned gray." "First officer's log, stardate 4708.4. The ship has been invaded by space pixies. I must save us all! (Note to self: remove emotional outburst before sending logs to Starfleet Command.)" "First officer's log, stardate 4708.6. Space pixies gone, but room is now filled with buxom space women. I am mildly concerned, but it has been about seven years now..." ------------------ "I'll be the sky above the Ganges I'll be the vast and stormy sea. I'll be the lights that guide you inward. I'll be the visions you will see." -- R.E.M.
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TSN
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Nurse Chapel: "Ugh! Whaddaya suppose he does w/ this?!"Dr. Wallace: "I'm thinking we never should have decided to go through Captain Kirk's stuff while he was away..." Spock: "Be glad you're not looking at what he keeps on his computer!" *prepares to be sick* ------------------ "Look into any eyes you find by you; you can see clear to another day..." -The Grateful Dead, "Box of Rain"
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DeadCujo
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"Hey Spock, check out my Tarkalian bong"------------------ The morbid dog known as shaun lyle...
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Jay
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Spock: Sol System to the principal's office please. Will Mr. Sol System please report to the principal's office.------------------ Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life. ~Pablo Picasso
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AndrewR
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Spock: one of these buttons must get me out of this desk...------------------ With the first link, a chain is forged. The first speech censured, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably." Capt. Jean-Luc Picard - The Drumhead
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Bernd
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Welcome to Christine's Hair Studio This week's special offer: Hydrogen peroxide treatment only $49.99 for men------------------ Brain. Brain. What is brain? (Kara the Eymorg, "Spock's Brain") www.uni-siegen.de/~ihe/bs/startrek/
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The First One
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posted
In the studio, Leonard Nimoy lays down the backing track for his 60's hit "The Ballad Of Bilbo Baggins."
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Siegfried
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Can't you all see what is going on here? Spock's reading steamy cyber-romance novels while Chapel and the other woman prepare for mud wrestling! Yes!------------------ "Some people call me the Space Cowboy. Yeah! Some call me the Gangster of Love. Some people call me Maurice. Whoo hoo! 'Cause I speak of the Pompatus of Love!" - Steve Miller Band's The Joker
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The_Tom
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Unbeknownst to many, most notable Frank G, winner of the last Commrelay CapCom, Paramount briefly courted buying the rights to the "Interrogation of Charles Capps" thread back in the sixties, but several publicity photos were all that were ever produced.------------------ "Breen. Try saying it. Bre-een. Rolls nicely off the tongue, doesn't it?"
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Xentrick
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In the Starfleet Rest Home, a befuddled Mister Spock attempts to get old Amos & Andy shows on the "talking box" as the nurses ready yet another colonic.
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Xentrick
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Nurse Chapel: "Mister Spock, as sure we can build a warp core with just old medical supplies?"Spock: "Yes, but I must finish studying these 20th Century files. Computer: access all data on 'MacGyver.'"
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The Excalibur
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Spock: Nurse Chapel, hold yours up and stand on one leg. Dr. hold yours in front of you and stand on both feet, yeah, that's better, we're getting a picture now !!------------------ Here I Come To Save The Day : Mighty Mouse
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Jeff Raven
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Spock: I'm sorry ladies, but you're going to need much more than a bungee cord and a thigh master to fix the warp engines...------------------ "You bellowed?" - Black Arachnia - Agenda
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Sol System
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Spock: "The box clearly said heat on high for two minutes, yet the center of my pastry is still frozen."------------------ "I'll turn everything around and confuse you. I'll fix it so you can't remember what was true." -- They Might Be Giants
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AndrewR
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as Spock hits a button that reads - "Vent" - water streams out of Nurse Chapels' head and into the measuring cylinder------------------ With the first link, a chain is forged. The first speech censured, the first thought forbidden, the first freedom denied, chains us all irrevocably." Capt. Jean-Luc Picard - The Drumhead
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Tahna Los
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Spock: I'm old, the mind dims...... I'm not as logical as I used to be.------------------ I can resist anything....... Except Temptation [This message was edited by Tahna Los on March 19, 1999.]
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Krenim
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Spock: Are you almost finished recreating that cure from the 20th Century yet?Nurse Chapel: Almost. Dr. Wallace: I've got it! Adrenaline! Spock: Adrenaline? I thought you were making Viagra! Where did you get your knowledge of the 20th Century from? Tom Paris: From me, you freakasaurus! ------------------ Ah... Now I enter these hallowed halls a conqueror... Yes... -Megatron, "The Agenda, Part Three"
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The Excalibur
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Spock readys the music, while the girls break out the "Toys".------------------ Here I Come To Save The Day : Mighty Mouse
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The First One
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The winner is TSN. Runners-up are The_Tom and The Excalibur.
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