Right, so.... Anyone who knows me (and there are quite a few people in here who do)knows that i've currently been away from ICQ alot, and have reffered to myself as being in the 9th circle of hell. Having met with many questions as to what, exactly, is in the 9th circle of hell, and why I'm there .... I figured it was time I posted a forum message so that I can get it all out there, and people will stop askin me.

The 9th circle of hell, to me, is the circle where resides terminal diseases, nasties that never go away, evil men who like to beat people up, occassional 60's folk tunes, pictures of Richard Simmons naked, and talking blue hamsters from Mars.
Why am I here? Well, because I have a terminal disease. Yup. Don't blink. Close your mouth. Thank you. It isn't going to go away, and as of right now, there are no proven treatments to this, or causes for it, or anything. It's called C.F.I.D.S .... Most people know it as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome (this is an inaccurate name for it, however). It exists ..... and I have it.
So excuse me if I think i'm residing in hell. I mean... this on top of college on top of the 60 other shitty things that happen to everyone has just really made the last three months one heck of a Hellish experience.
I'm not pitying myself ... Well, I can't pity myself IRL, because that gets one absolutely nowheres, does it? And please don't throw sympathy, or hugs, or anything at me... I didnt post this to get any of that. I just felt that the 9th circle of hell needed explaining.
Right.... so ..... back to listening to 60's folk music and watching *shudder* Richard Simmons run 'round naked...... Catch you later folks.....

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If Galileo had lied to save his life, would America, or the West, or Space have been discovered?
And if Columbus had never set sail, would the Earth still be flat?

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Edited: .. Some people have different ideas of Terminal. So I guess I should edit this and say that my idea of Terminal is "Something you will have for the rest of your life, that threatens the way you will live it, and has potential to kill you" . It's not like Cancer, or some of those other things. (Though in some circles IS being compared to AIDS)

[This message was edited by Jubilee McGann on April 05, 1999.]
 

Right now I feel like that guy in the alien suit in "Jose Chung's 'From Outer Space. . .'"

*repeats over and over with his head in his hands*

This is NOT happening, man, this is NOT happening. . . 8)
 

Sorry.

And don't depress yourself further by thinking about things you can't change. No matter how much you wish, Richard Simmons will always look like that. And no matter how hard we try, we can never change Richard. Or Robin Williams.

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'It's okay to only know three chords but God, put them in the right order'
-Hank Hill

 

And what's your gripe with Robin Williams, Liam? HMM?

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If Galileo had lied to save his life, would America, or the West, or Space have been discovered?
And if Columbus had never set sail, would the Earth still be flat?

[This message was edited by Jubilee McGann on April 04, 1999.]
 

Thank you.

--Baloo

PS: I could have happily gone to my grave without ever considering that underneath his clothes, Richard Simmons is naked.

[*Shudder!*]

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COMPONENT EQUIVALENCY NOTICE:
The Subatomic Particles(Electrons, Protons, etc.) Comprising This Product Are Exactly the Same in Every Measurable Respect as Those Used in the Products of Other Manufacturers, and No Claim to the Contrary May Legitimately Be Expressed or Implied.
 

The best place I can send anyone who wants to know about this is here:

Understanding CFIDS .... this is from the National Organization for CFIDS.

It's actually a little known disease that affects more people than you'd think. ...

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If Galileo had lied to save his life, would America, or the West, or Space have been discovered?
And if Columbus had never set sail, would the Earth still be flat?
 

It sounds like CFIDS is an autoimmune disease (or similar to some types of the same). I will keep an ear to the ground and let you know if I stumble across anything that might be relevant (though I am certain you are doing the same as well).

If it isn't prying, what symptoms are you manifesting?

--Baloo

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IMPORTANT NOTICE TO PURCHASERS:
The Entire Physical Universe, Including This Product, May One Day Collapse Back into an Infinitesimally Small Space. Should Another Universe Subsequently Re-emerge, the Existence of This Product in That Universe Cannot Be Guaranteed.
 

Right now... I'm experiencing the muscle pain, zero energy, lack of concentration, nausea, sore throat and headache. *frowns* ..

It's not prying... thanks alot, I appreciate your involvment in this

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If Galileo had lied to save his life, would America, or the West, or Space have been discovered?
And if Columbus had never set sail, would the Earth still be flat?

 

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If Galileo had lied to save his life, would America, or the West, or Space have been discovered?
And if Columbus had never set sail, would the Earth still be flat?

 

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"And though I once prefered a human being's company, they pale before the monolith that towers over me."
--
They Might Be Giants

Suffice to say that I've read the linked-to info about CFIDS/ME and you should feel free to let off some steam here any time you need to. I doubt anyone here would begrudge you that, since it'd be a far more worthy use of the space than trivial gripes about the weather, or Microsoft etc.

It takes a lot of guts to come to terms with a chronic illness. We all wish you luck, and are confident in your ability to overcome it.
All the best.

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"I'm sorry I'm late....
I've been irrigating the desert...
Which isn't easy on your own."
- M&W

[This message was edited by Montgomery on April 06, 1999.]
 

Best wishes for everything. I know I wouldn't have the faintest idea if this happened to a close friend of mine. I can only imagine what you are going through, and your friends are probably feeling bad too. The last thing they want to do is hurt you.

But, I must stress, if you carry on mentioning Richard Simmons, I shall be forced to come round there and show you nude photos of Monty. Then you shall know true fear

Just don't ask how I go them...

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'Saying it in a stacato voice doesn't make it any more true'
-Stewart Lee
 

Yes. Learning you have a disease that will demand you alter your lifestyle and expectations is a loss. Denial is stage one. Anger is stage two.

You've lost the freedom to go anywhere, anytime, whether you wanted to in the first place. The option was there and now it isn't. You've lost the freedom from pain that you expected as a matter of course. Your body isn't the obedient servant it once was. You have a right to be angry about this, even if getting mad doesn't resolve anything.

There are three more stages of grief to go through:

Stage 3: Bargaining.

Stage 4: Letting Go.

Stage 5: Acceptance.

You are likely to move forwards and backwards through all of these stages before you come to fully understand and accept what is. I've been there. Not by disease, but by a relationship that fell apart for no reason I could discern. It's still painful to discuss that matter, though the relationship is restored and healing. My advice? Be angry if that's what you feel. Grieve. Just don't get stuck at any one stage for too long.

Also, remember one thing: Your friends (both the genuine ones and the imitations) will have to work through the same process. Their friend (you) has unexpectedly become ill with a disease they do not understand and may fear. They don't know just how this will affect your relationship to them. They may not know if they have what it takes to be supportive. They might be so afraid to say the wrong thing that they avoid you. They might be ashamed that they weren't more supportive or say the right thing in the first place.

The genuine friends whose initial reaction was to flee your presence will eventually return. The imitations won't. Welcome back and forgive those who return. They realized the right thing to do a little later than the others, but they did return.

--Baloo

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WARNING:
This Product Warps Space and Time in Its Vicinity.
 

(and never jujubee... or I will have to be mean. )

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If Galileo had lied to save his life, would America, or the West, or Space have been discovered?
And if Columbus had never set sail, would the Earth still be flat?

 

I have an often fatal disease as well. You may have heard about it. It's called alcoholism. I have decided to no longer allow it to kill me.

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What do you mean I'm not kind. Just not you're kind.
--Dave Mustaine
"Peace Sells"
MEGADETH
 

So many people around here have their own personal "things" which we each live with.

I am a Chronic Asthmatic (and if you ask CC he will tell you I also smoke too much too)
I have had it since before I knew.

Then there is my dear old spine to go with the boot too!

Something I tell myself every day

Life is Terminal. So LIVE!
(Depressing - maybe, but interperted correctly is opens you mind)

Thats my best........

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---- AAARRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!----

I feel better now.

 

Stationmaster: Thanks... I'll have to use that one sometime.

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Ring this little golden bell
And see what changes with it's knell
Or Wonder, till it drives you mad...
What would have happened if you HAD.

(Well, I didn't say how old, did I?)

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I'm a Dirtling and PROUD OF IT!

[This message was edited by Baloo on April 11, 1999.]