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Posted by The_Tom (Member # 38) on :
 
I've been reading about it in several places, put only today did I go and visit the website in question.

WOW.

I urge everyone to read the entirety of the "Satan Trek" section. The Spork page is nifty, too.

Elsewhere on the site the author does concede the entire Church of the Lamb thing is a joke, but judging by the comments he's getting in his guestbook and on forums around the web, a lor of people are taking this a serious born-again cult stuff. (I wouldn't be surprised if there were similar websites actually done by people like that online)

Check this out...

quote:

'Counselor' Troi - Demon-Possessed Alien Whore

Lieutenant Worf - Philistine Warrior in Satan's Dark Army

Captain Picard - The Anti-Christ, the Tempter, the Dark Servant

Commander Riker - Lust-Crazed Hypocritical Whoremonger

Commander Data - Basically a Walking Vibrator

Geordi LaForge - Deformed Mutant & Inferior Human

Chief O'Bryan - Pagan Blasphemer and Drunkard

Tasha Yar - Upstart Self-Rightous Wench

Dr. Crusher - Secular Humanist Whore & False Teacher

Westly Crusher - Whelp Offsping of A Demonic Witch


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"......"
�������������-The Breen at Internment Camp 371

[This message was edited by The_Tom on May 11, 1999.]
 


Posted by Jubilee (Member # 99) on :
 
*floored, completely*

I believe those people were the ones responsible for the burning of my people in the olden days...

Please, someone tell me that they aren't serious, and i've just escaped into the Twilight Zone or somewheres.......

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28 days and counting........
*HUGE EFFING BIGASS GRIN*


 


Posted by The_Tom (Member # 38) on :
 
THEY

AREN'T

SERIOUS

(and while I'm at it,) Liam:

YOU

NEED

HELP.

(You can never tell him that too often)

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"......"
�������������-The Breen at Internment Camp 371


 


Posted by Elim Garak (Member # 14) on :
 
What does Liam needing help have to do with this?

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Quark: "Lesson number one: No one involved in extra-legal activity considers himself nefarious." (DS9: "The Sound of Her Voice")
 


Posted by Jaresh Inyo on :
 
Just a rountine "Seek Help" reminder.

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Josh: I think they're getting to know each other a bit too well, if you catch my drift.
Me: Oh, I agree. I think they're spending too much time together, that is of course, if you catch my drift.
Asher: I think he's *ucking her, and he's cheating on his wife, and he's risking his marriage, and if his wife finds out about it she'll leave him and take their son, and his life will be ruined. If you catch my drift...

 


Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
 
*LOL*

*deep breath*

*LOL*

Oddly enough, all the women are whores except for Yar, who happens to be the only one on the list to actually have sex that first season...

(I am extremely tempted to construct a cast photo based on these descriptions, but it would never get past the censors. )

This reminds me of "The Force=Satan Homepage."

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"You hear about 'constitutional rights,' 'free speech,' and the 'free press.' Every time I hear these words I say to myself, 'That man is a Red!!...' You never hear a real American talk like that!"
--
Mayor Frank Hague, Jersey City

[This message was edited by Sol System on May 11, 1999.]
 


Posted by LB4747 on :
 
Satan Trek? Wow. Someone had a bit too much bad LSD.


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"Since you put me down
It seems
I've been very gloomy
You may laugh
But pretty girls look right through me" -In The Darkest Place

[This message was edited by LB4747 on May 11, 1999.]
 


Posted by Charles Capps (Member # 9) on :
 
Sol, mind posting that URL? *L*

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"Okay, so I'm not "SANE" so to speak, but uh... I'm the lovable kind of psycho"
http://solareclipse.net/

 


Posted by Feste on :
 
Hilarious. The Falwell-Tinky-Is-Gay folks will take it seriously but satire has never been their strong suit to put it mildly. Am I the only one who thinks being a Philistine Warrior In Satan's Dark Army sounds like a lot of fun?

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"'I'm afraid there's nowhere for you to sit,' I said coldly; 'the verandah is full of goats.'" --Saki "The Guests"
 


Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
 
The Force=Satan Homepage

And just because this picture makes me laugh obscenely...

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"You hear about 'constitutional rights,' 'free speech,' and the 'free press.' Every time I hear these words I say to myself, 'That man is a Red!!...' You never hear a real American talk like that!"
--
Mayor Frank Hague, Jersey City

 


Posted by Jay the Obscure (Member # 19) on :
 
Ok, I won't take this too far, but this just stuck out to me far too much to be ignored.

Ok, one passage writes:

"The most famous one is the "USS Enterprise". An enterprise is a business venture. This means that the show is about money."

and later is goes on to write:

"Also, Satantrek encourages our youth to be lazy never-do-wells. On Satantrek there is no use of money."

Ok, so it's logic, read about it.

That's all I feel like I can write now, unless I move the keyboard to the floor where I fell after laughing so hard.

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We sell forbidden objects from places men fear to tread.
We also sell frozen yogurt, which I call "Frogurt"!
 


Posted by Saltah'na (Member # 33) on :
 
Do not be fooled by the silky carress of Satantrek. It's easy to be fooled into thinking "it's just a TV show" as many idolaters have said in this site's guestbook. Wrong!! Satantrek is just another of Satan's ways of luring people into the abyss such as: racial integration, homosexual "rights", women's lib, animal "rights", and all that other crap the bleeding heart liberals want you to believe. It's ALL against the word of GOD!

I am not surprised by these and other similar statements. Those guys have always been against human rights and stuff......... So what's wrong with racial integration, women's lib and stuff? Sins hurt the advance of the human race. What makes such things, which benefit society as whole as sins? I'd like them to answer that question.

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I can resist anything.......
Except Temptation
 


Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
 
*gently reminds everyone that this is a joke*

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"You hear about 'constitutional rights,' 'free speech,' and the 'free press.' Every time I hear these words I say to myself, 'That man is a Red!!...' You never hear a real American talk like that!"
--
Mayor Frank Hague, Jersey City

 


Posted by Xentrick (Member # 64) on :
 
Joking, yeah, but they still make a few good points

[this is extra funny to me because I just read a conspiracy theorist's 33 page website saying that UFO's are all faked by the Illuminati, the Moon-landings and Shuttle flights have all been hoaxed by NASA& Disney, and Star Trek is just filled with Illuminati/Masonic/Templar symbolism!]
 


Posted by Sol System (Member # 30) on :
 
I'll have to post the link to the site that warns of a future ruled by "exponentially reproducing homosexual cyborgs" sometime.

------------------
"You hear about 'constitutional rights,' 'free speech,' and the 'free press.' Every time I hear these words I say to myself, 'That man is a Red!!...' You never hear a real American talk like that!"
--
Mayor Frank Hague, Jersey City

 


Posted by Montgomery (Member # 23) on :
 
bibble-bibble-bibble-bibble

"This all true, that is to say it's all lies. But they're entertaining lies, and isn't that the point?"

I guess the next step in the argument is Quantum Leap as the fifth Gospel.

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"You're wrong, and you're a grotesquely ugly freak."

- Chris Morris, Brass Eye


 


Posted by Curry Monster (Member # 12) on :
 
Most, most amusing.

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there's a bird in the chimney,and a stone in my bed
when the road's washed out,they pass the bottle around
and wait in the arms,of the cold cold ground



 


Posted by Trinculo on :
 
The website may be funny. Sadly, there are people who will believe the guff that is said and begin believing accordingly. BTW, I couldn't tell a joke if it bit me in the ass.
 
Posted by The Excalibur (Member # 34) on :
 
36 of D!!! LMAO, signed the guest book.

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INSURRECTION



 




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