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[QUOTE]Originally posted by TSN: [QB] I can't explain, but General Jack D. Ripper and Group Captain Lionel Mandrake can... <blockquote>Ripper: "Mandrake..." Mandrake: "Yes, Jack?" Ripper: "Have you ever seen a commie drink a glass of water?" Mandrake: "Well, no, I... I can't say I have, Jack." Ripper: "Vodka. That's what they drink, isn't it? Never water?" Mandrake: "Well, I... I believe that's what they drink, Jack, yes." Ripper: "On no account will a commie ever drink water? And not without good reason?" Mandrake: "Oh... Ah... Yes... I, um... don't quite see what you're getting at, Jack." Ripper: "Water. That's what I'm getting at. Water. Mandrake, water is the source of all life. Seven tenths of this Earth's surface is water. Why, do you realize that seventy percent of [i]you[/i] is water? Mandrake: "Oh, oh..." Ripper: "And as human beings, you and I need fresh, pure water to replenish our precious bodily fluids." Mandrake: "Yes..." Ripper: "Are you beginning to understand?" Mandrake: "Yes..." *laughs nervously* Ripper: "Mandrake... Mandrake, have you never wondered why I drink only distilled water or rain water, and only pure grain alcohol?" Mandrake: "Well, it-it-it... it did occur to me, Jack, yes." Ripper: "Have you ever heard of a thing called fluoridation? Fluoridation of water?" Mandrake: "Uh, yes, I... I have heard of that, Jack, yes." Ripper: "Well, do you know what it is?" Mandrake: "No..." Ripper: "Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face?" <center>...</center> Ripper: "Mandrake, do you realize that, in addition to fluoridating water, why, there are studies underway to fluoridate salt, flour, fruit juices, soup, sugar, milk, ice cream... Ice cream, Madrake. Children's ice cream." Mandrake: "Good lord..." Ripper: "Y'know when fluoridation first began?" Mandrake: "Ah... no. No. I don't, Jack, no." Ripper: "Nineteen hundred and forty-six. 1946, Mandrake. How does that coincide with your post-war commie conspiracy, eh? It's incredibly obvious, isn't it? A foreign substance is introduced into our precious bodily fluids without the knowledge of the individual. Certainly without any choice. That's the way your hardcore commie works." Mandrake: "Now, Jack, Jack... Listen, tell me... Tell me, Jack, when did you first... become... well, develop this theory?" Ripper: "Well, I, uh... I-I first became aware of it, Mandrake... during the physical act of love." Mandrake: "Huh..." Ripper: "Yes, a, uh... a profound sense of fatigue, a feeling of emptiness, followed. Luckily, I... I was able to interpret these feelings correctly. A loss of essence." Mandrake: "Eh..." Ripper: "I can assure you it has not recurred, Mandrake. Women, uh... women sense my power, and they seek the life essence. I do not avoid women, Mandrake. But I... I do deny them my essence."</blockquote> [/QB][/QUOTE]
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