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1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars to see if they slow down. 2) Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.) 3) Insist that your e mail address be [email protected] or [email protected] 4) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that. 5) Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair dancing. 6) Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "IN". 7) Develop an unnatural fear of staplers. 8) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso. 9) Reply to everything someone says with, "That's what you think." 10) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy." 11) Adjust the tint on your monitor so that the brightness level lights up the entire working area. Insist to others that you like it that way. 12) Dont use any punctuation 13) As often as possible, skip rather than walk. 14) Ask people what sex they are. 15) Specify that your drive through order is "to go". 16) Sing along at the opera. 17) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme. 18) Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Wear them one day after your boss does. (This is especially effective if your boss is the opposite gender.) 19) Send e-mail to the rest of the company to tell them what you're doing. For example: "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom." 20) Put mosquito netting around your cubicle. 21) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.
------------------ Ross: "Inter arma, enim silent leges." Bashir: "'In the time of war the law falls silent.' Cicero. Have we become a 24th-century Rome, driven by the fact that Caesar can do no wrong?!" -Inter Arma Enim Silent Leges
Saltah'na
Chinese Canadian, or 75% Commie Bastard.
Member # 33
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22) Make beeping noises when a large person is backing up. 23) Set the photocopier to 99 copies, double sided, extra dark, 200% magnification. 24) Follow a few paces behind someone and spray everything they touch with a can of Lysol 25) Practice making Fax and Modem Noises 26) Learn Morse code with your friends/co-workers, and have conversations consisting of "bip-beep-beep-beep-bip-beep" 27) Wear your bicycle helmet to work and claim it is part of your "Astronaut training" 28) Holler Random numbers when someone is counting.
------------------ "My Name is Elmer Fudd, Millionaire. I own a Mansion and a Yacht." Psychiatrist: "Again."
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