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» Flare Sci-Fi Forums » Community » Officers' Lounge » Microwaving Eggs -- Fires, Exploding Appliances, and Grandma's Slippers

   
Author Topic: Microwaving Eggs -- Fires, Exploding Appliances, and Grandma's Slippers
Siegfried
Fullmetal Pompatus
Member # 29

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It's 2:00 a.m. I'm watching SNL reruns on Comedy Central and staring my clock in hopes that my insomnia isn't going to claim another victory. Right now, Gore has a better of chance of becoming the President now than I have of getting to sleep.

At least I have breakfast to count on in about six hours. Ah, breakfast: my favorite meal of the day! I love experimenting with omelettes and other "Get the Day Going" feasts. Unfortunately, I'm a college student living in the residence halls. And I'm in a room that doesn't have a kitchenette. All I have is my trusty microwave.

Now, eggs are the vital component of my breakfast. I have been tempted to buy a hot plate (against housing policy, but like I care about that anymore). However, I live in an apartment-style building that is 20 years old and made almost completely out of wood. I'm living in a kindling box!

For three weeks, I've been microwaving my eggs. All I can say is, "YUCK!" Anyone ever try microwaved scrambled eggs? It's like chewing on your grandmother's left bedroom slipper while deeply inhaling the fragrance of the right slipper. I tried making a boiled egg, too. The damn thing exploded. And popped a circuit breaker. And broke the bowl.

So I am asking for help from anyone and everyone who has had to cook eggs the cheap way. Is there a better way to make scrambled eggs or boiled eggs without blowing up appliances or burning down my building?

Until then, I think I'll scrounge around for some change and eat breakfast in the cafeteria (not that it'll be much of an improvement).

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694 consecutive rejections by women since January 1993.



Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Lee
I'm a spy now. Spies are cool.
Member # 393

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Get an electric kettle, put the eggs in there.

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"Businesses used to be like Christianity; if you were faithful and obedient, you could obtain bliss in the afterlife of retirement. Now it's more of a reincarnation model. If the worker learns enough in his current job, he can progress to a higher level of employment elsewhere."

- Dogbert


Registered: Jul 2000  |  IP: Logged
Nim
The Aardvark asked for a dagger
Member # 205

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My microwave does great eggs. Just melt some butter in a bowl, crack three or four eggs in it, put in some milk, salt n' pepah and pierce the yokes. Nuke for a minute or two at max (750w+-), stir around with a fork then nuke some more until you've got the desired consistency.

I don't like when residual water is left under the scrambled eggs so I usually nuke it a few extra 30 seconds or just pour the water out of the bowl, the latter being a very sophisticated move comparable to Shaolin-trials.
I mean, it's a shame to just drop all that fine egg when you haven't started eating, no? Wait now!? How's about a colander?

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Here lies a toppled god,
His fall was not a small one.
We did but build his pedestal,
A narrow and a tall one.

-Tleilaxu Epigram



Registered: Aug 1999  |  IP: Logged
Orion Syndicate
He's not the messiah, he's a very naughty boy!
Member # 25

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Interesting, in four years of being a student I've never thought to microwave eggs.

What kind of shit accomodation have you been lumbered with anyway where you don't even get a kitchen with a gas/electric cooker. The vast amount of my cooking is done on the cooker. I do eat some ready meals for which I do have a microwave.

If you're blowing up your food, then the microwave's power setting is probably too high and you're probably leaving the food in there for too long. You could adjust that and try again. However, if at all possible MOVE OUT AND FIND SOMEWHERE ELSE!

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Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.



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First of Two
Better than you
Member # 16

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4 words: Sausage and Egg McMuffin.

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"My knowledge and experience far exceeds your own, by, oh, about a BILLION times!" -- Q



Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Jeff Raven
Always Right
Member # 20

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As someone who used to microwave eggs at home(I wasn't allowed to use the stove at that age), I will note it is very tricky to get it right, without having egg all over the inside of the microwave.

However, I think Nimrod has discovered the right consistency of water/oil to make the eggs turn out good.

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"President Bush. It's fun saying that. Go ahead, you try." - M. Lucinsky, Spectrum Editor


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Nim
The Aardvark asked for a dagger
Member # 205

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I can't see how stirred eggs in a bowl can explode, didn't you mean eggs with their shells intact? That I can understand, happens to tomatoes too...

Another thing in favor of microwave-eggs, less dirty dishes!

There's a neat trick for bacon as well. Put about six sides or half the package on a piece of kitchen-paper and fold over two times. Cook them for a minute or two at full power (cap'n) or just before they get a little black somewhere. 80% of the fat will be absorbed by da paper and I've gotten fabulous, al dente bacon from it many times.
But in a pan is fun too. I like to fry them topless, it reaffirms my manhood.
*GilmoreSpeak* "Aah, is that all you've got? Ooh, yeah baby! Ah, that hurt a bit, but I'm ok!!"

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Here lies a toppled god,
His fall was not a small one.
We did but build his pedestal,
A narrow and a tall one.

-Tleilaxu Epigram


[This message has been edited by Nimrod (edited February 02, 2001).]


Registered: Aug 1999  |  IP: Logged
Siegfried
Fullmetal Pompatus
Member # 29

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Never fry bacon in the nude. Trust me on this.

As for the eggs, I tried experimenting with additives (oil, butter, water, milk, and cheese) and I can never get them just right. As for hard boiling in the 'wave, I am NOT going to go through the hassle of cleaning up egg debris again!

A friend of mine recommended I buy a rice cooker. Similar to a hot-plate/griddle but the heating coil is inclosed. I'll probably look into that since I even rice quite a bit too.

And as for the accomodations, nope, I not that thrilled about them. I used to living in the other two complexes (which are a hell of a lot more social). However, I'm only paying about $350 a month for this room (includes everything), and I'm waiting to start a new job at the new apartment complex being built.

Thank you all for your responses! I'll keep y'all posted.

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Nic: She's not a practicing lesbian. We need PRACTICING lesbians!
Me: I have a camcorder.
Nic: But no lesbians.
Me: Ahhh... no.
Nic: DAMN IT MAN! WE NEED LESBIANS! LOTS AND LOTS OF LESBIANS!

ICQ Conversation From January 23, 2001.


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Quatre Winner
Active Member
Member # 464

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Question: What is Alfred Hitchcock's favorite breakfast meal?

Answer: The EGG MACGUFFIN!

*rimshot*

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"Okashii na... namida ga nagareteru. Hitotsu mo kanashikunai no ni."
(That's funny... my tears are falling. And I'm not sad at all.) - Quatre Raberba Winner


Registered: Dec 2000  |  IP: Logged
Diane
aka Tora Ziyal
Member # 53

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I don't think there's any way to boil eggs in the microwave without having them explode.

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"Censoring the Internet is like putting a toll booth at the bottom of the ocean."

--Celia Pearce, The Interactive Book


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TSN
I'm... from Earth.
Member # 31

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Maybe they're like hot dogs. You just need to poke some holes in them first. :-)

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My new year's resolution is the same as last year's: 1024x768.


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Sol System
two dollar pistol
Member # 30

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Breakfast? As in a meal before noon? Freaks.

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I will shout until they know what I mean.
--
Neutral Milk Hotel
****
Read three (three!) chapters of "Dirk Tungsten in...The Disappearing Planet"! Then, go insane!



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an'on
Member
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Recommend 1 Tablespoon water or milk per egg to help with consitency. Also to avoid rubbery texture--don't cook all at once. Cook some. Stir/Fluff with fork (Don't plan on using this fork to eat as it will have raw egg gunk on it). Cook some more;stir/fluff. Repeat until eggs are done. 'Tis a bit more time consuming...though it balances a bit with having to chew on rubbery eggs.
Registered: Sep 1999  |  IP: Logged
   

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