posted
Oh, definitely!! I always prefer in person. It's just that it tends to creep girls out when I show up at their homes to ask them out I don't work with her or anything, so really the only way I have to get in touch with her is by phone.
posted
Interesting note: This girl was the one I'd occasionally talk about X-files with...the only one girl I could really talk about sci-fi with. Now, until there is a really big episode that changes the series (for a few months only) or until the series finale, I don't think I'll be comfortable having a casual conversation with her about it anymore.
posted
Ok...let's dissect this. I assumed that you didn't know this girl that well before you asked her out.
So what was the situation and what did you say exactly when you asked her out. If you've got friendship history with her, this may not be totally unsalvagable.
I guess it depends on how well you know the girl, but I've found that if two people are friends, regardless of which one does the asking (and I've been on both ends), the friendship continues. Just go up to her, and start talking about the X-Files.
posted
Right. As long as you don't have a deep seeded secret love for her and as long as you don't continue to pressure her for a date after she's said no (and, incedently, as long as she's not psycho), the wierdness can probably be kept to a minimum. Just give it a few days and then start talking about the X-Files is getting cancelled.
posted
OK, I've known her for 5 years maybe, and I don't know how much we can consider ourselves friends, but I have been talking to her now and then, not always on the subject of X-files.
I suppose if I wait a while, I can act like nothing happened and bring up the subject of X-files ending in May.
However, the whole reason I asked her out was that someone I knew said she wanted to go out with me. So I acted on his report. Apparently, he is a lying bastard, so I should put his name, adress, phone number, etc., on this forum so all you can mess with him.
But I'm not interested in becoming involved with the cops. Besides, on Tuesday, he will wish he never said anything.
All I said, BTW, was "Hey--do you want to go out?" Acting on the advice of another friend, I attempted to keep eye contact and be myself. But I was so surprised that I had actually done what I did that I did not do that, I think.
Anyway, I am hoping this will all blow past me and her. Seeing that no one mentioned it to me besides the people I told, it looks like she didn't tell any of her friends. (And I don't intend to keep pressuring her...it will make it seem like I'm a jerk and a pervert)
posted
Ok...rookie mistake...but it's not fatal. Don't just say, "Wanna go out." Ask her to do something. "I'm going to see Lord of te Rings this weekend. Would you like to go with me?" That way, it's not a big thing. It's just getting together and hanging out to do something that you were already going to anyway. Now, as you go along and build the foundation up a bit...you can become a little more direct.
"Wanna go out" says, "I want to go on a date with you and be your date and take you out for a date."
IMHO, and again...let's not confuse me with someone who knows what he's talking about...casual is better up front. you don't have to be boyfriend/girlfriend after the first date...it can be "get to know you" for awhile.
"Also think of dating this way: Its all about the sex."
*adds that to the list of philosophies that will one day destroy mankind*
*realizes he doesn't have a list of philosophies that will one day destroy mankind*
*considers starting one*
*remembers he's too lazy and goes back to thinking about when he's finally going to ask out the girl he's wanted to ask out for months now*
I'm in class w/ her five days a week. Last semester, too. And yet, here I am still. Why must I suck so incredibly much?
Registered: Mar 1999
| IP: Logged
Shik
Starship database: completed; History of Starfleet: done; website: probably never
Member # 343
posted
quote:Originally posted by TSN: Why must I suck so incredibly much?
I usually find that HELPS me get dates. Of course, I also usually furnish them with a list of references.
-------------------- "The French have a saying: 'mise en place'—keep everything in its fucking place!"
Registered: Jun 2000
| IP: Logged
posted
Don't feel bad, TSN...I finally got the cahones to go up to a woman and introduce myself out of the blue a few weeks ago myself. That's the girl I'm calling tonight.
It's hard. "The approach" is the hardest part. Once you get that "in" with her...it gets easier. But the introduction will always be the worst part for me...That and wondering continually if she thinks I'm an idiot...
OnToMars
Now on to the making of films!
Member # 621
posted
Here's a conundrum to ponder:
How do you ask a girl out when she has the car?
"Wanna go see Lord of the Rings. Can you drive?"
I was restricted in my use of my car over the summer (91 mph in a 50 mph - a miracle I was even allowed near my car after that) for basically only non social purposes. I could go to class, run errands, and respond to fires (I was a volunteer firefighter) and that was about it. This put a bullet through the brain of a fledgling relationship at the time, cause she only had a stick shift and didn't feel like fucking bothering to learn how to drive one!
At the same time, I was taking a summer class, the last day of which I asked this girl out. Was shot down, but always wondered what I would've done after that. And now, thanks to that original speeding blunder and an academic one to follow it, I am sans car for my freshman year and essentially in the same situation. Oy!
(tell the story CaptainMike!)
-------------------- If God didn't want us to fly, he wouldn't have given us Bernoulli's Principle.
Registered: Jun 2001
| IP: Logged
posted
Walks in the park are nice. Dinner at a local restaurant. If you're in college, there must be stuff to do somewhat near by. You could always plan stuff with other people...kind of a double date, though I wouldn't use that phrase...more along the lines of "Of few of my friends are going to do whatever...would you like to come along?"
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
I don't work with her or anything, so really the only way I have to get in touch with her is by phone.![[Wink]](wink.gif)
Besides, on Tuesday, he will wish he never said anything.
Printer-friendly view of this topic
