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Found this at the Herd Thinners site (look for it at Yahoo).
The problem ... is that we have run out of dinosaurs to form oil with.
Scientists working for the Department of Energy have tried to form oil using other animals; they've piled thousands of tons of sand and Middle Eastern countries on top of cows, raccoons, haddock, laboratory rats, etc., but so far all they have managed to do is run up an enormous bulldozer-rental bill and anger a lot of Middle Eastern persons. None of the animals turned into oil, although most of the laboratory rats developed cancer.
-- Dave Barry, "Postpetroleum Guzzler"
Dave Berry just cracks me up! Not every time, mind you, but frequently.
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*has read quite a few of Dave Barry's books*
------------------ I try, in that moment, to see through your soul when all that is driving my heart forward is you, thoughts of you, hopes for you, and a fading dream with a Mona Lisa smile that whispers "are you thinking of me too?" - Leanna Allen