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For Liam, I present the entire Witch Scene.
CROWD: A witch! A witch! A witch! We've got a witch! A witch! VILLAGER #1: We have found a witch, might we burn her? CROWD: Burn her! Burn! BEDEVERE: How do you know she is a witch? VILLAGER #2: She looks like one. BEDEVERE: Bring her forward. WITCH: I'm not a witch. I'm not a witch. BEDEVERE: But you are dressed as one. WITCH: They dressed me up like this. CROWD: No, we didn't -- no. WITCH: And this isn't my nose, it's a false one. BEDEVERE: Well? VILLAGER #1: Well, we did do the nose. BEDEVERE: The nose? VILLAGER #1: And the hat -- but she is a witch! CROWD: Burn her! Witch! Witch! Burn her! BEDEVERE: Did you dress her up like this? CROWD: No, no... no ... yes. Yes, yes, a bit, a bit. VILLAGER #1: She has got a wart. BEDEVERE: What makes you think she is a witch? VILLAGER #3: Well, she turned me into a newt. BEDEVERE: A newt? VILLAGER #3: I got better. VILLAGER #2: Burn her anyway! CROWD: Burn! Burn her! BEDEVERE: Quiet, quiet. Quiet! There are ways of telling whether she is a witch. CROWD: Are there? What are they? VILLAGER #2: Do they hurt? BEDEVERE: Tell me, what do you do with witches? VILLAGER #2: Burn! CROWD: Burn, burn them up! BEDEVERE: And what do you burn apart from witches? VILLAGER #1: More witches! VILLAGER #2: Wood! BEDEVERE: So, why do witches burn? [pause] VILLAGER #3: B--... 'cause they're made of wood...? BEDEVERE: Good! CROWD: Oh yeah, yeah... BEDEVERE: So, how do we tell whether she is made of wood? VILLAGER #1: Build a bridge out of her. BEDEVERE: Aah, but can you not also make bridges out of stone? VILLAGER #2: Oh, yeah. BEDEVERE: Does wood sink in water? VILLAGER #1: No, no. VILLAGER #2: It floats! It floats! VILLAGER #1: Throw her into the pond! CROWD: The pond! BEDEVERE: What also floats in water? VILLAGER #1: Bread! VILLAGER #2: Apples! VILLAGER #3: Very small rocks! VILLAGER #1: Cider! VILLAGER #2: Uhhh, gravy! VILLAGER #1: Cherries! VILLAGER #2: Mud! VILLAGER #3: Churches -- churches! VILLAGER #2: Lead -- lead! ARTHUR: A duck. CROWD: Oooh. BEDEVERE: Exactly! So, logically..., VILLAGER #1: If... she.. weighs the same as a duck, she's made of wood. BEDEVERE: And therefore--? VILLAGER #1: A witch! CROWD: A witch! A witch! A witch! BEDEVERE: We shall use my largest scales! [yelling] BEDEVERE: Right, remove the supports! *the supports are removed, the scales do not move*
CROWD: A witch! A witch! WITCH: It's a fair cop. CROWD: Burn her! Burn her!
------------------ Jeff Raven - Having more fun than any human being should be allowed to have
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People like to blame things on the Internet because it's the last form of anarchy.
------------------ "I have come to the conclusion that one man is called a disgrace, that two are called a law firm, and that three on the law become a congress! And by God I have had this Congress!" --John Adams, "1776"
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Look at the crazyness here. Threads about chocolate. Does Jubilee weigh the same as a duck. People remembering entire scences from Monty Python Films.
It's complete chaos, and evil. We should all be BURRNNNNEEDDD
------------------ 'Those are the headlines. Happy now?' -Chris Morris.
------------------ http://frankg.dgne.com/ Ultra Magnus: "I know you're bored, Rodimus, but with the mantle of leadership comes obligations." Rodimus Prime: "I don't suppose I could interest you in a used mantle?"
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