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This still cracked me up!

The full strip is at http://www.herdthinners.com/kk990303.html

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CAUTION:
The Mass of This Product Contains the Energy Equivalent of 85 Million Tons of TNT per Net Ounce of Weight.

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I think you're having WAY too much fun with those comics.

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"A fellow's invented see-through film
He calls it 'cellophane!'
Another has built a parachute
For jumping out of an airplane!

Remarkable things flow endlessly
From out the human brain!
Indeed
And what a remarkable age this is!"
--Titanic: the Musical

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"Some people call me the Space Cowboy. Yeah! Some call me the Gangster of Love. Some people call me Maurice. Whoo hoo! 'Cause I speak of the Pompatus of Love!" - Steve Miller Band's The Joker