posted
This parody is based on the Merit Pay controversy in the Los Angeles Unified School District. I am against it mainly because it measures a teacher's success on how well the students do in a standerdized exam. Feel free to add your opinion since I have a paper due on the subject when Spring Break is over. '
Blame Teachers
Times have change, out kids are getting worse They used hang around skid row, now they don�t have sex and even curse Should we blame the homosexuals, or the entire society, Or all the positively charged images on TV?
No, Blame Teacher, Blame Teachers With all their greedy little eyes and lessons full of lies Blame Teachers, Blame Teachers We need to form a full assault, it�s the Teacher�s fault
Don�t blame me, for my son Stan He took AP US History and now he�s off to leave the Klan And my boy Eric once, had my picture on his shelf But now he tells me to join AA or die by myself
Blame Teachers, Blame Teachers It seems everything went wrong when teachers came along Blame Teachers, Blame Teachers Being a teacher isn�t a fulfilling anyway
My daughter didn�t want to be a doctor or a lawyer when she was two But now she has a scholarship thanks to Arnold�s Barbecue Should we blame the manager, should we have him fired? Or the bastards who didn�t let the scholarship expire?
Heck no! Blame Teachers, Blame Teachers With all their self-independence nonsense And their �Crime comes with consequence� Blame Teachers, Shame on Teachers For... their liberty codes, their ethical talks, This must be all undone, all at once Before we loose the kids and all the welfare the US Government has been giving us
(parody of Blame Canada from South Park: Bigger, Longer, and Uncut)
------------------ "Life's a bitch, then you die" -USS Vanderbilt, Vanderbuilt Class starship
posted
Okay, I'll bite. Let me start by saying that I am a teacher working in Southern California, though not in Los Angeles. Therefore, the merit pay controversy doesn't affect me directly. Yet.
The whole concept of merit pay is utterly ridiculous. If I taught an identical group of students for three to four years, then their academic performances could legitimately be laid at my feet. However, that is hardly the case. Students enter and leave my class at all times during the semester. Let's say a student from another district with a very poor academic record moves into my district and enters my class. Am I to be held responsible for him? The merit pay supporters would probably say "yes."
Try these examples on for size. Students in my classes have been committed to mental institutions, incarcerated for offenses ranging from narcotics possession and sale to violent assaults and extreme sexual harassment. Heck, these student populations spend more time out of school due to disciplinary offenses than in the classroom. Am I responsible for their academic performances? Should I be? Let's not forget to mention the extreme difficulties sometimes encountered trying to teach special education students, who are often incapable of higher level cognitive reasoning or proper behavior (a stereotype, perhaps, but one that is often borne out in practice). Oh, but fear not, merit pay supporters, we teachers should still somehow make them high achievers, right?
Teaching in Southern California also means dealing with large immigrant populations. Some of my students are illegal aliens from Mexico who are illiterate in Spanish, let alone in English, primarily due to the piss-poor educational system in their home country. Should I be held responsible for their achievement? Heck, some can't even undestand simple directions like "sit down and take out a piece of paper" due to the language barrier! According to the merit pay supporters, probably.
The role of class scheduling plays a huge role in the whole merit pay concept. I was once blessed to have nearly every valedictorian assigned to my classes. It was a simple quirk of the scheduling computer, but my year was an absolute joy. My students were polite, responsible, and genuinely interested in learning. Nearly every single one attended college. If merit pay was in effect at that time, I would have undoubtedly received higher pay not due to my own teaching abilities, but due to the outstanding students I was fortunately assigned. Now, fast-forward several years. The students assigned to me now are of a generally lower academic quality. I asked one class how many of them were planning on attending college sometime in the next decade, and only two out of thirty raised their hands. According to the standardized test results, my teaching abilities have declined severely over the past five years. Or, have they?
Finally, have you ever noticed how the most vocal suporters of merit pay are often parents? Well, let me posit a direct relationship between how loud and obnoxious a parent is and whether they support merit pay. Let me posit another direct relationship between how much quality time said parents spend with their children and their grades. I often ask parents whether they read to their children, and the response is often, "Why should I? That's what schools are for." No, I am not kidding. The trend is to blame teachers for failures in the home. We are convenient targets because we are on the front lines every single day. With that type of attitude, what incentive is there for students to perform well on standardized tests like the Stanford 9? Many merit pay supporters need to remove their heads from their collective anal canals and spend time with their children, instead of blaming others.
Speaking of said test, are you all aware that it rarely aligns with the state subject area standards? In other words, freshmen are sometimes tested on things they haven't been taught yet, and juniors might be tested on things they haven't reviewed since being underclassmen! So, are we really testing them validly on current skills and knowledge, or just wasting a whole lot of time and money? My money is on the latter.
Finally, basing pay on these tests completely neglects the wondeful experiences that occur within the classroom. For example, I had the privilege of having a gang member with a serious criminal record assigned to me several years ago. The word privilege was intended, since I learned through the school year what a good person he was inside, and how much he wanted to taste even a spoonful of success. For whatever reason, he enjoyed my class and actually worked and learned. By the end of the year, he could compose, prepare and present multimedia presentations, even making his own movie! He failed every other class but mine. He would have still bombed the Stanford 9, thus exposing me as a horrific teacher, because that test fails to take into account student growth over time.
Sorry for the long rant, but the whole merit pay idea is sheer lunacy, and it ticks me off.
Putting flak jacket on....
------------------ Everything in life I ever needed to know I learned from The Simpsons.
posted
Normally I steer well clear of the Flare board, but I feel I must voice my opinions on this matter.
Both my parents are teachers, one a vocational shcool principal, and the other is a substitute teacher. They cannot help it if the students under them have little ambition and even less motivation to study. Try as they might, it is always an uphill struggle to get them to even shut up and take out their books - God knows they (the students) might learn something! (Oops, wrong topic for mentioning God )
I tutor six students at home at week-ends in Maths and Physics for the Leaving Cert - that's an exam equivalent to the HSE's(sic) or A-Levels, in that performance in it determines what college you can go to and what courses you are eligible for. Unfortunately, this has turned the Irish second-level education system into one giant two-year exam preparation. Little effort is put into actual understanding, as nearly all the teachers time is gone in class trying to get all the topics covered quckly that'll come up in the exams. I myself did 10 written exams in the space of three weeks, not to mention the 2 orals and 2 aurals I had in Irish and French I had to do. Luckily I fared quite well in them (465/600 overall), and got into first-choice college and course.
A lot of my contemporaries (at the time) did not however. There's always talk of blaming the teachers (no empty threat in small towns!), but here's an example of what the teachers are fighting against, from my own experience: One of the lads I tutor is studying for the Junior Cert, an lesser exam taken by all two years prior to the Leaving. I do honours maths with him, and have been doing so since before Xmas. He got his mocks back a fortnight ago, and you know what he got? 41% and 10% in each paper. THAT'S SHITE!! I mean, he showed me the papers and his exam manuscripts, and he didn't even attempt half the questions!! He's ighly intelligent, but lazy as hell. And now he's dropped down to Pass level. I'm right pissed off with him, for his lack of effort, and mainly because his parents (who've paid me well for my work) will feel that they've wasted a ton of money and blame me.
What can I do? If I was being paid for results, I'd have to give money back! I've been told not to worry, that it's the teacher's responsibility to get them through the exams, not mine. Yet still I fell partially responsible for their results in these looming exams. But like I've said and have been told, if they don't do the study themselves, they won't pass. Having your pay affected by how good/bad your minds-of-their-own students fare is unjust.
It may weed out genuinely bad teachers (a scourge in my locality) but then so to would independent and random inspection of teacher performance.
Now *I* must go and do some study for my own exams. This has been a Gaseous Anomaly Public Rant. Thank you.
Oh, and welcome to Flare, Constellation Of One; you'll find us an eerie bunch whose strange pusuits include gnome roasting, giant shin-kicking, and endless debate on the mythical creatures WolfTreeViveNein and Okuda, and wild conspiracy theories, such as the obliteration of the number 120m from the ST lexicon.
[This message has been edited by Gaseous Anomaly (edited April 16, 2000).]
posted
Gaseous Anamoly, I completely understand your situation. You can only do so much with the materials at hand. Its like my old Master Teacher (the teacher who trained me) used to say: "You can't save them all. They have to make their own choices in life."
And, thanks for the welcome. I've lurked for several months, but the merit pay post finally motivated me to register.
------------------ Everything in life I ever needed to know I learned from The Simpsons.
Both of my parents are teachers, and I tell you , I defy ANY person critical of teachers to go into a public school for ONE WEEK and handle their load without cracking. _I_ tried it, and I couldn't hack it.
It's virtually impossible to teach people who don't care about learning, who are more interested in Pokemon cards or last night's episode of Dawson's Creek, and whose parents absolutely refuse to get involved in their child's education (or in some cases I've seen, actively HINDER their child's education), who spend more time in detention than they do in school, whose idea of fun is to go out and get wasted during the weekend (or weeknight, for some of them) or who are in such dire economic straits that they're working after school just to help their family make ends meet.
And teachers shouldn't be penalized for that, It's stupid.
------------------ "Nobody knows this, but I'm scared all the time... of what I might do, if I ever let go." -- Michael Garibaldi
posted
I feel that I should respond but everything seems to have already been said. I'm going into the teaching profession (3 more years) and already I have to put up with people complaining about teachers. I will do my best though.
------------------ Death before Dishonor! However Dishonor has quite a disputed defintion.
posted
I was talking to this guy at another site whose opinion (and wit) I've come to admire (indeed, I've secretly repeated a few of his diatribes on this flameboard), and we were talking about teachers, and he said:
"You know, I've got a lot of respect for teachers and the crap they have to put up with. The only problem with teachers is that they aren't allowed to enforce any kind of discipline anymore, thanks to overreaction to abuse laws and a lot of feel-good self-esteem rubbish. What they OUGHT to do is give every teacher a handgun and alow them a 10-percent casualty rate. THAT would create motivation to learn. *BLAMM!* 'Okay, anybody else decide not to do their homework?'"
This, of course, is an extremist opinion, and I truly HOPE he was being humorous. On the other hand, it might work... especially if we got the PARENTS as well. "AIIGH! an asignment from Mr. Killemall! Johnny, you're damned well doing your homework BEFORE you go to the mall! HERE! I'll HELP you understand it!!"
------------------ "Nobody knows this, but I'm scared all the time... of what I might do, if I ever let go." -- Michael Garibaldi
But what you say is true, First. I know that if my parents were allowed to exercise corporal punishment on their students (as they did on me, something I have no bad feelings over - apparently I was a hell-raising prick-with-ears when I was young) then they might get something productive done.
My father though was taught by Christian Brothers, or as they've come to be known over here, the military wing of the Catholic Church. He is glad that they're all dead now, because in his own words, they were antichrists. And I can easily believe him.
There must (or should - damn this litigious world!) be a fine line between enforcing discipline and savagery. I don't know if allowing a teacher to strike a pupil is giving anyone carte blanche to flake seven shades of living out of them, but human nature leads me to believe that it would be all too easy for some teachers to cross that line. I, for one, would if provoked enough. My ferocious temper is held back only by my vanity: If I lose control, what will others think of me?
Sad, isn't it?
------------------ Devil: Oh look at the time! I'm late for services. Stone: Services? Devil: A group of young teenagers that have been celebrating the Black Sabbath are planning on deep-sixing their gym teacher tonight. I'm gonna go and give them a little encouragement.
posted
First of Two, you're friend is correct about teachers not being able to enforce discipline out of fear of harassment and litigation. I know teachers who have chosen not to bust students for cheating because of the track records of the parents in question. They know that there will be a parent conference in which the parent "goes off" and threatens to take the matter to the school board. Now, the student may be dead to rights guilty of academic dishonesty, but the teacher has to weigh the hassles inherent in apprehending the student, calling the parents, being yelled at by them, often confronting a student who lies to his parents about the incident after the fact, and the resulting administrative hoops that he/she will be forced to jump through.
I think I might have seen a student cheating a few weeks ago by looking at another student's test during the exam. I had a very nasty conference with the student's parents several weeks earlier. If it was any other student, I would have given him an exceptionally stern warning and called the parents to advise them that any further behavior, intentional or not, would result in severe disciplinary consequences. But you know what? I didn't. It wasn't worth pushing, since I hadn't caught the student with the proverbial smoking gun, just a very strong suspicion.
We also get sued a whoe lot, usually by special education parents. Not to bash special education studnets or their parents, but they seem to be the ones who litigate at the drop of a hat. My persona ltheory is that they're so defensive about having a learning disabled child that they externalize their feelings by directing then at the school system (pop psychology mode now off). If you don't give them three, four, even ten disciplinary chances, you will get sued. Get caught with weapons and drugs on campus? No problem. Teacher can't touch you. Attack another student to the point of sending him to the hospital? You won't be disciplined. You can't be. Your disability made you do it. And, IDEA '98, the federal law that governs this area of education, ACTUALLY ALLOWS PARENTS TO DO SUE. Thanks, bleeding heart liberal congress. Don't believe me? Ask any experienced teacher.
The sad part is that most kids respond well to structure and reasonable discipline, which is all that most teachers try to enforce. Shooting or physically striking kids should be off limits - that's going too far. I was hit by a teacher in grade school over something that I wasn't guilty of; not being like that evil crone/hag is one way that I've tried to pattern myself as an educator. Hopefully, I'll succeed.
------------------ Everything in life I ever needed to know I learned from The Simpsons.
posted
Well, as a child of a mother who has threaten teachers who "gave" me grades that were less than excellent, I know what kind of crap teachers have to deal with. I earned a B last semester in my AP English Language class and let's just say my mother went on a rampage...that and I was grounded for a month. Of course that didn't stop me from having a personal life, thanks to the internet and Unison. This semester my mother visited my 12 year old sister's councilor since she earned five B's and one C. She was looking for her English teahcer, and thank God that she only teaches 5 classes and goes home after the 5th one. This is why I make sure my teachers and my mother have little or no contact at all.
Parents need to learn that there is no such thing as perfect. It's an ideal, and you can't just blame teahcers when Johnny can't read or why Sally has 5 "A's" and 1 "B". There is only so much that the teacher can do, the student and the parents have to do the rest. As for my current situation, I'm glad that my mother didn't meet all my teachers at our school's Open House. I just feel so sorry for my Aca Deca teacher and French teacher...
------------------ "Life's a bitch, then you die" -USS Vanderbilt, Vanderbuilt Class starship
posted
Just wondering M_T: what exactly is "Aca Deca"? Should I fear the response?
And no offense, but your mother's a loon. That kind of over-reactionary parent-teacher relation can only be damaging. Worrying about what your mother might do is in no way a good motivator. Unless your teachers start singling you out because of it, which shouldn't happen if they're good teachers. They'll just realise that your mother is over-zealous in the pursuit of your future. Maybe "loon" is too strong a word, now that I think about it. She's probably just overly-protective. My circuit diagrams have, of late, been telling me such things.
------------------ Devil: Oh look at the time! I'm late for services. Stone: Services? Devil: A group of young teenagers that have been celebrating the Black Sabbath are planning on deep-sixing their gym teacher tonight. I'm gonna go and give them a little encouragement.
posted
Good luck with Decathlon! I'm the Decathlon coach at my school - best experience teaching I've had. What I love is that its not just for the A++++ students; anyone can join.
For any parents out there reading this thread, please look into Academic Decathlon at your local high school. Its a wonderful experience, kids with poor grades tend to improve overall after a year of intense studying and work, and it really builds teamwork.
I hope your school did well!
------------------ Everything in life I ever needed to know I learned from The Simpsons.
posted
I do tend to go with the notion that it's not the teachers job to dicipline the kids. They should never ever hit them.
Of course, if little Jonny's been caught dealing drugs on campus, then while the teachers might not be able to use corporal punishment, then his parents at least should beat seven kinds of hell out of him.
That's an exageration BTW, but when I grew up, if you got in trouble at school, I was mainly terrified of seeing my parents. (Damn my whiet suburban middle-class upbringing). The teachers try to punich, but can't. The parents can (to an extent), but are unwilling.
HEducation is buggered, isn't it?
------------------ *Amusing quote not available, please call back later*
posted
That is assuming that Mummy can even accept that fact that little Johnny might have done something wrong in the FIRST place.
When I was a kid, my father had this to say to my school. "He gets in trouble, you smack him. Then you sendf him home so I can smack him again." I was, generally, a very well-behaved student... to the point where the faculty came to believe that if I did something 'bad,' I must have had a good reason for doing so, and they let me go with a warning.
Today, many parents are so egocentric or so out of touch that you could show them a videotape of their kid committing a crime, clearly showing his face, and some of them would STILL not be able to accept it. "MY kid would never do that, and that's all there is to it."
Then you've got a certain subculture where learning, intelligence, success, and self-control have somehow all become 'bad' things, and this is often reinforced by parents, and once someone's gone down that path, it's extremely hard to come back out.
------------------ "Nobody knows this, but I'm scared all the time... of what I might do, if I ever let go." -- Michael Garibaldi
)
Badly needed.
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