posted
Well, I saw this pic that Fitz put up - he really does do excellent scans and vidcaps, looks for some of his stuff in the next Phasers update, whenever that may be! And I thought, "why not?"
Saltah'na
Chinese Canadian, or 75% Commie Bastard.
Member # 33
posted
Kirk: Omigod, I have a nosebleed
Alien: Tilt your head back, that should stop the bleeding.
Klingon Guard: No, actually, in order to stop a nosebleed, you should pinch your nose, and tilt your head forward. You should do this for up to 10 seconds This causes the blood to clot and the bleeding stops.
Kirk: Hey it worked!!!
Alien: Now we know.
Klingon Guard: And knowing is half the battle!!!
G. I. JOE!!!!
------------------ "Or maybe he was a real quack who got sick and tired of pissing people off, and decided to get a life and masterbate for the next 10 years." - Me to Antagonist on Red Quacker, 03/08/01 20:15
posted
Captain Kirk, having partaken of way too much Klingon bloodwine, had to be escorted back to his bunk...
------------------ "The Long Kiss Goodnight begins, more or less, with Geena Davis being kicked in the head by a deer. This was the high point of the film."
posted
Kirk gets hit so hard, he flys into the Officers' Lounge Forum. The frequenters, seen behind him, are preparing to toss him back into the Contests Forum.
*toss*
------------------ "I write messages on money. It's my own form of social protest. A letter printed on paper that no one will destroy. Passed indiscriminantly across race, class, and gender lines and written in the blood that keeps the beast alive A quiet little hijacking on the way to the checkout counter. and a federal crime. I hope that someone will find my message one day when they really need it. Like I do." -Rage against the Machine
posted
::William Shatner thrown into a room of disgruntled Priceline.com customers::
Shatner: "Honestly, I'm just the spokesman for Priceline.com, I..."
::Gets beaten until he finally shuts up::
Sadly Mr. Shatner will never again be able to sing in a Priceline.com commercial.
------------------ "Let me ask you something, Mr. Garibaldi, a purely philosophical question. On a scale of 1 to 10, how stupid do you think I am anyway?" - Bester Federation Starship Datalink: Brand new look, fresh minty scent, same great taste!
posted
William Shatner stage dives into the audience. All six of them.
------------------ "Goverment exists to serve, not to lead. We do not exist by its volition, it exists by ours. Bear that in mind when you insult your neighbors for refusing to bow before it." J. Richmond
[This message has been edited by Jeff Raven (edited April 04, 2001).]
posted
In the next Star Trek movie, Captain Kirk returns from the dead to stop an evil empire bent on destroying the Federation. But the movie includes graphic content to attract younger audiences.
*extras have Shatner secured*
Shatner: No, please...I can't take much more of this.
:Rick Berman in the background: Bill, don't worry. The doctor said that the broken ribs won't be hurt when Steve Austin hurls you 50 yards across the set.
Shatner: When I said I would return for the sake of the franchise and a multimillion dollar payoff, I didn't think that I'd kill my...
:Patrick Stewart in the background: Alright, bring Mr. Shatner to his position. Steve just finished warming up with the bowling balls.
Shatner: NO...OH FOR THE LOVE OF GOD SOMEONE PLEASE STOP THE MADNESS...MADNESS I TELL YOU...I WON'T DO THIS SHIT...I WON'T DO THIS SHIT FOR UNDER 20 MILLION....NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...
------------------ "When I said to get involved in the gay community, I didn't mean to sleep with everyone in it." Michael_T
[This message has been edited by Michael_T (edited April 05, 2001).]
[This message has been edited by Michael_T (edited April 05, 2001).]
"His arm! Look at his arm! It has a different color than what we have here... I want it! I want it!"
"What's that on his face? I want to have that! Give us more! WE WANT MORE!"
*SLAP* *PUNCH* *KICK*
"Look he has more! I want some! Give me some of that color too!!"
*KICK* *PUNCH*
------------------ Terry: "Carter, Reagan, Bush, Clinton, ...." Max: "And?" Terry: "I forgot." Max: "Come on, Clinton was the fun one, then came the boring one." Terry: "They're all boring."
Shik
Starship database: completed; History of Starfleet: done; website: probably never
Member # 343
posted
"Edward Norton" gets his chance to fulfill a wish when William Shatner shows up at Fight Club.
(And if anyone actually gets that reference...sparkin'.) ------------------ "For people with resources, the right events happen. They may look like coincidences, but they arise out of necessity." --T�rk Hviid
[This message has been edited by Shik (edited April 05, 2001).]
Klingon Prison Governer: But how do you know he is a witch?
Prisoner: He looks like one!
Kirk: I'm NOT awitch. They dressedmeup asone.
------------------ At that point, McDonald fired his gun three times in the air to emphasize his point. The crowd, estimated at 350,000, loudly cheered the new candidate.
"Let me make this clear: I am the law! I am your ruler! And you will have fries with that, motherf*cker!"
posted
Shatner quickly realizes that these people aren't going to ask for an encore.
------------------ "Goverment exists to serve, not to lead. We do not exist by its volition, it exists by ours. Bear that in mind when you insult your neighbors for refusing to bow before it." J. Richmond
Saltah'na
Chinese Canadian, or 75% Commie Bastard.
Member # 33
posted
Jeff, there are seven of them....
------------------ "Or maybe he was a real quack who got sick and tired of pissing people off, and decided to get a life and masterbate for the next 10 years." - Me to Antagonist on Red Quacker, 03/08/01 20:15
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