Saltah'na
Chinese Canadian, or 75% Commie Bastard.
Member # 33
posted
New FDA Alcohol Warnings for Booze Bottles
- Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not. - Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a loser. - Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell the same boring story over and over again. - Consumption of alcohol may cause you to thay shings like thish. - Consumption of alcohol may convince you that your ex is really dying to hear from you at 4 am. - Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and/or name you can't remember). - Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead. - Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that you're tougher than a really big guy named Kong. - Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible. - Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you. - Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx in the time-space continuum, whereby small... or large gaps of time may seem to literally disappear. - Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy.
-------------------- "And slowly, you come to realize, it's all as it should be, you can only do so much. If you're game enough, you could place your trust in me. For the love of life, there's a tradeoff, we could lose it all but we'll go down fighting...." - David Sylvian FreeSpace 2, the greatest space sim of all time, now remastered!
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
- Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and/or name you can't remember). This is known as a leghold date. Where you wake up with your arm under something ugly and you chew it off rather than wake the thing up.
Consumption of alcohol may actually CAUSE pregnancy If it wasn't for alcohol most of us wouldn't be here.
-------------------- "and none of your usual boobery." M. Burns
Registered: Oct 2001
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posted
Somebody should send this list to Liam when he goes off on the rest of us for suggesting that drinking ain't good for you.
-------------------- "The best defense is not a good offense. The best defense is a terrifyingly accurate and devastatingly powerful offense, with multiply-overlapping kill zones and time-on-target artillery strikes." -- Laurence, Archangel of the Sword
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
Of course it's not good for you. Alcohol is a poison. Duh.
-------------------- Yes, you're despicable, and... and picable... and... and you're definitely, definitely despicable. How a person can get so despicable in one lifetime is beyond me. It isn't as though I haven't met a lot of people. Goodness knows it isn't that. It isn't just that... it isn't... it's... it's despicable.
Registered: Mar 1999
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OnToMars
Now on to the making of films!
Member # 621
posted
Oh oh! I got one!
-Alcohol may cause you to think that gravity no longer applies to you. When in fact, it does.
-------------------- If God didn't want us to fly, he wouldn't have given us Bernoulli's Principle.
Registered: Jun 2001
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Battle Damage Chest Insignia MIB
Ex-Member
posted
Warning: Alcohol may give you a vomity after taste upon too much consumption.
IP: Logged
Shik
Starship database: completed; History of Starfleet: done; website: probably never
Member # 343
posted
"WARNING: Members of the opposite sex may be uglier than they appear."
-------------------- "The French have a saying: 'mise en place'—keep everything in its fucking place!"
Registered: Jun 2000
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Saltah'na
Chinese Canadian, or 75% Commie Bastard.
Member # 33
posted
Not Necessarily, Shik. Remember the "Beer Goggles" in the Simpsons?
- Consumption of Alcohol may lead you to believe that your ugly neighbour/co-worker/friend/friend's spouse has had recent plastic surgury along with possible recent weight loss.
[ December 11, 2001: Message edited by: Tahna Los ]
-------------------- "And slowly, you come to realize, it's all as it should be, you can only do so much. If you're game enough, you could place your trust in me. For the love of life, there's a tradeoff, we could lose it all but we'll go down fighting...." - David Sylvian FreeSpace 2, the greatest space sim of all time, now remastered!
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
"Not Necessarily, Shik. Remember the "Beer Goggles" in the Simpsons?"
Er, surely that's exactly what Shik was saying?
-------------------- Yes, you're despicable, and... and picable... and... and you're definitely, definitely despicable. How a person can get so despicable in one lifetime is beyond me. It isn't as though I haven't met a lot of people. Goodness knows it isn't that. It isn't just that... it isn't... it's... it's despicable.
Registered: Mar 1999
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Saltah'na
Chinese Canadian, or 75% Commie Bastard.
Member # 33
posted
... umm.....
yeah, that's right. I think I need more sleep
-------------------- "And slowly, you come to realize, it's all as it should be, you can only do so much. If you're game enough, you could place your trust in me. For the love of life, there's a tradeoff, we could lose it all but we'll go down fighting...." - David Sylvian FreeSpace 2, the greatest space sim of all time, now remastered!
Registered: Mar 1999
| IP: Logged
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