Shik
Starship database: completed; History of Starfleet: done; website: probably never
Member # 343
posted
So the producers of “The Real World” & “Jackass” have gotten together to film a movie, & now they’ve released it, & now we have “The Real Cancun.” For those not up with the hip movie scene, “The Real Cancun” follows the adventures of 16 college students ranging from 18 to (I believe) 24 as they endure a tiny hot-as-fuck Mexican island during Spring Break.
Or more to the point, the island endures THEM.
In this grand masterpiece of cinema, we see said “cast members” running the gamut in activities from drinking to sex to drinking to partying to drinking to wet T-shirt contests to drinking to smoking up to drinking.
Did I mention that there was drinking? Because there is.
These kids run around the island doing things that really no one should ever want to have captured for posterity on film—unless they’re a complete & utter retardotron. Reports have come out now that the cast was constantly fed free alcohol provided by the producers & film crew; that they were encouraged to “be at their naughtiest,” & that it was “all in good fun.” One 18-year-old was captured being coerced into his first alcoholic drink ever; this happens early on in the “plot” (wait, there’s a plot?) & he spends the rest of the time as blazed out on distilled grain products as the rest. The glorification of the “hookup” culture is continued through several graphic sex scenes, & the emphasis on being single-tracked (or in this case, double-tracked) of mind has all the subtlety of a bowling ball through the brainpan.
So why do it? Why be PROUD of it, as these kids are? I won’t go see this incredible performance of hedonistic largess because I have to live near it. Yet for that same reason I’m sure it’ll be a HUGE success in State College; after all, who doesn’t want to see beautiful people on a 12-foot-tall screen doing THE EXACT SAME THINGS YOU DO? Why, it’s like they’ve filmed YOU instead of the tanned blonde with D cups & the square-jawed muscled guy in bikini briefs! And think back to your youth…or, if you’re still young, think of the shit you do now. Do you really want someone to be able to pick up something at the video store in 20 years & show it to your kids? Porn is one thing—you can kind of excuse that. But this? It’s just dumb.
The very fact that this movie is being released, much less even MADE, is a seriously disturbing thought. The kids are being used for profit, & in this day of instant fame where everyone & their uncle wants to be A STAR!! it simply feeds off the flow of insanity. The masses are just getting dumber, & this doesn’t help. This thing? It’s gonna be on 98 different screens here, I bet…& I’m told I’ll have to wait like 3 months to see something good like “Bend It Like Beckham” around here.
Why? What is the point & the draw?
-------------------- "The French have a saying: 'mise en place'—keep everything in its fucking place!"
Registered: Jun 2000
| IP: Logged
posted
I'd rather have the video of Styro's weekend just past.
-------------------- "The best defense is not a good offense. The best defense is a terrifyingly accurate and devastatingly powerful offense, with multiply-overlapping kill zones and time-on-target artillery strikes." -- Laurence, Archangel of the Sword
Registered: Mar 1999
| IP: Logged
posted
Honestly, guys, you can't pretend that you're surprised this would happen?
Sweden was among the first countries to get docusoaps, the survivor predecessor "Expedition: Robinson" being the most popular (and sadistic), we've had about ten national shows spawn from it too, as well as getting "Big Brother". We've endured this crap since '96, I hope the Box office flop of this new movie will give the producers a damn clue...
I so long for the day when this franchise will collapse under its own weight, the way they're doing it I think in btw 4-5 years they will have suckled the phenomenon dry. At least I hope so...
Registered: Aug 1999
| IP: Logged
Cartman
just made by the Presbyterian Church
Member # 256
posted
Once the novelty wears off, people get tired of it. Says more about the public than the producers that "reality" TV has lasted this long.
Registered: Nov 1999
| IP: Logged
posted
This movie sounds like the British schlock we've seen on our TV's over the last few years. Shows like "The Villa" - basically a bunch of young dumb-fucks in a Villa in Majorca, Spain.
SUCH a bad show.
It's not as bad as that feral British show which basically has a group of nasty, feral-looking fat poms - walking around most naked on some beach/resort somewhere. It was like National Geographic meets Two Fat Ladies!
I didn't get what the purpose to the show was as I quickly turned it over.
Andrew
-------------------- "Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica." - Jim Halpert. (The Office)
posted
AndrewR: Really? Ours was called "Villa Medusa", in the med, the contestants gave eachother black or white trophy camels as "points" or "faults", based on good or bad deeds of the "defendant". So fucking penalistic.
And, get this, last week, when our buxom "Big Brother"-Linda got kicked out (famous here for having lots of live sex), she [i]"had to talk to counselors that were available from the TV-company". Wow, I'm so surprised.
-------------------- "I'm nigh-invulnerable when I'm blasting!" Mel Gibson, X-Men
Registered: Aug 1999
| IP: Logged
posted
There have been several shows none of whose titles I can remember but that should have been called "Retarded, ignorant, rude, dumb pricks go binge drinking in Ibiza and pick up a variety of cheap tarts". A bit long, I know, but it does the job.
-------------------- "I am an almost extinct breed, an old-fashioned gentleman, which means I can be a cast-iron son-of-a-bitch when it suits me." --Jubal Harshaw
Registered: Feb 2002
| IP: Logged
![[Big Grin]](biggrin.gif)
![[Smile]](smile.gif)
Printer-friendly view of this topic
