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Author Topic: As your Dictator...
Feste
Ex-Member


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If I decide to cast my lot with yours on your climb to despotism, what do you intend to do about gum crackers, junk mail, and oh - my weasel landlord? I was going to mention my pet peeve - theater morons - but Xentrick beat me to it. Suggest Monty's Acme EM Pulse Generator be mass produced and made easily affordable; it should also work on high decibel boom boxes.

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"'I'm afraid there's nowhere for you to sit,' I said coldly; 'the verandah is full of goats.'" --Saki "The Guests"


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Jubilee
...complete with cherries!
Member # 99

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Good, good... I see my plan is unfolding perfectly..... *GRIN*

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16 days and counting........
*HUGE EFFING BIGASS GRIN*
"Never underestimate the light side .......... ...... of duct tape."


Registered: Apr 1999  |  IP: Logged
First of Two
Better than you
Member # 16

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YOUR plan???

anyway... more changes.

I will add to the theatre statutes that anyone who brings a child under 2 to ANY movie, shall have to stand by after the movie while everyone disturbed by the child's crying, screaming, barfing, etc. punches them.

No mail addressed "occupant" or "current resident" will be accepted at the post office.

It will also be an offense to pass stopped traffic on the shoulder. Violators will be responsible for damage to any cars which get in their way.

Playing your car stereo so loud that it shakes windows of people's houses will be grounds for summary execution.

Importing illegal drugs by private plane will no longer result in forced landings, but in being shot down. Private boats attempting to bring in drugs may be sunk.

Criminals will be treated with the precise degree of mercy they showed to their victims. Sadistic criminals will recieve sadistic treatment.

HMO's will be forbidden to override treatments or prescriptions if they are reccommended by more than one doctor.

People who make bad remakes of Japanese children's shows and try to pawn them off on our puplic (The Power-less Rangers, etc) will be deported to North Korea.

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You're just JEALOUS because the little voices talk to ME!


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Sol System
two dollar pistol
Member # 30

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Why not just blow the whole damn planet up? It's lost most of the novelty.

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"You can't catch me where I'm gonna fall. You can't catch me where I'll hide. This world's too cold, this Nova rolls. I'm moving to the sun."
--
They Might Be Giants


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Elim Garak
Plain and simple
Member # 14

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That's an interesting comment for Sol to make as he is the whole system and it's similar to losing an arm for us.

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Garak: "I believe in coincidences. Coincidences happen every day. But I don't trust coincidences." (DS9: "Cardassians")


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
First of Two
Better than you
Member # 16

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Nope, not gonna blow the whole planet up.

At least.. not until I find another place to emigrate to.

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You're just JEALOUS because the little voices talk to ME!


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
bryce
Anointed Class of 2003
Member # 42

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My pastor says he pays taxes at the same rate the rest of us do.

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2 FINALS REMAINING! College is taken care of, summer job; check, now if I could get that girl back to her old self.

Oh, and that sig.file. :)

Wheelersburg Correctional Facility
#05301999-1382


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Sol System
two dollar pistol
Member # 30

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I don't see it as losing an arm so much as removing a tumor.

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"You can't catch me where I'm gonna fall. You can't catch me where I'll hide. This world's too cold, this Nova rolls. I'm moving to the sun."
--
They Might Be Giants


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
First of Two
Better than you
Member # 16

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Okay, good enough for income taxes... but what about property tax? You know, the money we pay so we can continue to live on the land we bought in the house we paid for?

*thought most recognized religions are supposed to enjoy some order of tax-exempt status*

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You're just JEALOUS because the little voices talk to ME!


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
bryce
Anointed Class of 2003
Member # 42

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My church owns his house(our parsonage). It is a luxury we provide for him. We do it because we feel we should (there is a verse we base this on), but as far as his income goes, it's the same. Pastors aren't the only professions with a house provided either. We pay the taxes on his house, but that comes out of our budget. If we didn't have a place for him then we'd end up paying him more, too.

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2 FINALS REMAINING! College is taken care of, summer job; check, now if I could get that girl back to her old self.

Oh, and that sig.file. :)

Wheelersburg Correctional Facility
#05301999-1382


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
bryce
Anointed Class of 2003
Member # 42

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Oh...if your going to go back to doing things the old fashioned way, why don't you restore all the old state churches from colonial times.

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2 FINALS REMAINING! College is taken care of, summer job; check, now if I could get that girl back to her old self.

Oh, and that sig.file. :)

Wheelersburg Correctional Facility
#05301999-1382


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Sol System
two dollar pistol
Member # 30

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Well, there was that whole constitution thing...

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"You can't catch me where I'm gonna fall. You can't catch me where I'll hide. This world's too cold, this Nova rolls. I'm moving to the sun."
--
They Might Be Giants


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
Montgomery
Reigning Supreme
Member # 23

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I get the feeling Sol wants to make a fresh start with Mars.

This seems the appropriate thread to remind everyone of my constantly-advancing research into Dr Monty's Bascillus. which when released into the atmosphere will make all women beautiful and destroy all men over 5'9".

First can still be dictator, so long as he doesn't stand up.

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"Now then, I believe Random Pavarotti disease is a psychological ailment and we should find it in the otherworldliness of Vince's brain."
"Ohw, rubbish. I reckon Random Pavarotti disease is a physical condition......
Let's go and look at 'is bum!"

-Rex the Runt


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
First of Two
Better than you
Member # 16

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Careful Bryce, if we go back too far they'll be throwing you in with lions again.

Of course, you got even for that with the Inquisition and Salem, right?

I was talking about going back to Constitutional times. Not before, as the systems of government that predated the Constitution were in conflict and not nearly as well done.

You know, when this country was founded less than 5% of people belonged to any organized church.

*has infiltrated Monty's project and obtained the vaccine. Is keeping it all for himself.*

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You're just JEALOUS because the little voices talk to ME!


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
The Excalibur
Senior Member
Member # 34

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My sister the Pastor also pays income tax, and has went a few rounds with the IRS.

Kill all the lawyers.(WS)

Monty wants me dead?? (5,11)

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PARTURITION


Registered: Mar 1999  |  IP: Logged
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