-------------------- "There are no three warp-engined or single warp-engined ships in Starfleet!". (Gene Roddenberry) Starship Class
Registered: May 2003
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Did you write the English text for that card? If so, I have a couple of suggestions to clean up the grammar, unless you've done that on purpose.
One thing you definitely need to change: When a word is broken between lines by a hyphen, the hyphen goes after the first part, not before the second part.
Other than that, the card looks really cool.
Registered: Oct 1999
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quote:Originally posted by Aban Rune: Did you write the English text for that card? If so, I have a couple of suggestions to clean up the grammar, unless you've done that on purpose.
One thing you definitely need to change: When a word is broken between lines by a hyphen, the hyphen goes after the first part, not before the second part.
-------------------- "There are no three warp-engined or single warp-engined ships in Starfleet!". (Gene Roddenberry) Starship Class
Registered: May 2003
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This is how I would write the different areas. But I've already been counseled for rewriting things today at work... so take it for what it is:
Top paragraph: Starfleet ships are equiped with gangway hatches that allow for docking with drydock or space dock facilities. There is a gangway hatch at the centerline of the port saucer rim on the U.S.S. Excelsior NX-2000. When docked, an umbilical allowing passage on and off the ship is connected here. The Excelsior Class Starship is also equipped with three docking hatches on the engineering hull.
Top Picture Captions: While docked, a ramp connected to the main gangway hatch allows direct entry onto deck 8.
The Gangway hatch is located on the rim of the saucer section at the port centerline.
Lower Left Picture Caption: A bottle of champaigne is traditionally broken over the foreward docking hatch of Excelsior Class Starships during their Christening ceremony.
Registered: Oct 1999
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quote:Originally posted by Aban Rune: Top paragraph: Starfleet ships are equiped with gangway hatches that allow for docking with drydock or space dock facilities. There is a gangway hatch at the centerline of the port saucer rim on the U.S.S. Excelsior NX-2000. When docked, an umbilical allowing passage on and off the ship is connected here. The Excelsior Class Starship is also equipped with three docking hatches on the engineering hull.
Top Picture Captions: While docked, a ramp connected to the main gangway hatch allows direct entry onto deck 8.
The Gangway hatch is located on the rim of the saucer section at the port centerline.
Lower Left Picture Caption: A bottle of champaigne is traditionally broken over the foreward docking hatch of Excelsior Class Starships during their Christening ceremony.
THank you very much, Aban.
But top picture captions are modifide text from Shane Johnson's "Mr. Scott's Guide to the Enterprise", ... .
-------------------- "There are no three warp-engined or single warp-engined ships in Starfleet!". (Gene Roddenberry) Starship Class
Registered: May 2003
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quote:Originally posted by AndrewR: Oh and the pointers on the card... too detailed for the fact files They should be like "This is a hatch" "This is the saucer".
Amasov Prime
lensfare-induced epileptic shock
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posted
quote:Originally posted by Captain Boh: Excelsior Bridge concept image from Art of Star Trek:
I always thought that this looks more like some Strategical War Room where you'd expect an Admiral overseeing a battle rather than a bridge.
Besides that, the big yellow "Impulse"-warning is just stupid. God knows what happens if the ship goes to warp. Maybe a huge "Warning! Ludicrous Speed!"-sign will pop up instead...
-------------------- "This is great. Usually it's just cardboard walls in a garage."
Registered: Nov 2001
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quote:Originally posted by Captain Boh: Excelsior Bridge concept image from Art of Star Trek:
I always thought that this looks more like some Strategical War Room where you'd expect an Admiral overseeing a battle rather than a bridge.
Besides that, the big yellow "Impulse"-warning is just stupid. God knows what happens if the ship goes to warp. Maybe a huge "Warning! Ludicrous Speed!"-sign will pop up instead...
I've always thought that the EX. bridge from ST:SFS was mostly a cleaner looking 80's version of the bridge from ST:TMP.?!?
has anyone got any ideas (any one designed) what the rest of the bridge would look like on screen?
BTW, This is my first post here at flare, and i'd like to say i'm glad to be here.
-------------------- My Favourite TV Quote: Dr Cox to JD "What are you saying? You want to be like me? I barely want to be like me."
Registered: May 2004
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-------------------- Justice inclines her scales so that wisdom comes at the price of suffering. -Aeschylus, Agamemnon
Registered: Aug 2002
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They should be like "This is a hatch" "This is the saucer". 
![[Roll Eyes]](rolleyes.gif)
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