posted
Next up, the superhero from South Africa: the Fantastic Boer...
-------------------- "I am an almost extinct breed, an old-fashioned gentleman, which means I can be a cast-iron son-of-a-bitch when it suits me." --Jubal Harshaw
Registered: Feb 2002
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posted
Not that I've been a fan of many of the recent comic-book adaptations, apart from The Punisher. . . OK, start again: not that I'[ve been a fan of many of the recent super-hero adaptations, but I think this might be going a bit too far.
What I have liked is how the other films have retained a degree of realism in how the super-heroes are depicted. You can sort of understand how Spider-Man does what he does, and on reflection I don't have a problem with those seemingly-inexhaustible web-spinners the approximet size of a bean being replaced by mutated glands. Daredevil is just some atheltic bloke with very heightened senses. As for how a mild-mannered scientist can turn green and bulk up when he gets in a tiff, well those of you who've experienced my temper in the past will agree it's not much of a reach.
Which brings us nicely to ver Fantastische Vier. Mr. Fantastic, he stretches. Fine, I guess, you can burble on about protoplasmic cell mutation or whatever. Explaining how Invisible Girl does her thing requires a bit more, but we've seen so many ways of making things invisible in the movies and TV these days you can easily apply one of them to this situation. The Human Torch. . . I don't know. Where does the energy come from? The Laws of Thermodynamics require that every non-CGIed action scene will involve him eating a lot, surely?
After all that, the Thing doesn't present a problem. He's just a guy with super-human strength, with a super-human need for some moisturiser.
And the uniforms! DuPont have worked many marvels, but I doubt their Lycra is up to the stretching, burning and transparency that'll be required of it. I don't think the target-audience's PG rating will stand up to regular ripping or removal of clothes, much as the Alba-fans may hope.
posted
Dude, those are unstable molecules, not some primitive segmented polyurethane. (I sure wish I knew chemistry lingo, or could fake it well.) Reed Richards invented them. They are a Marvel comic books staple, like mutants or bankruptcy. (OH SNAP.)
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
Okay, in that picture of the Lion King guy... I'm sure that's his other rear foot showing just underneath his body, but, the way it's been blurred out, well...
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
Fuck Disney anyway. Lets go back to discussing how we'd bone Jessica Alba.
-------------------- Justice inclines her scales so that wisdom comes at the price of suffering. -Aeschylus, Agamemnon
Registered: Aug 2002
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-------------------- "It speaks to some basic human needs: that there is a tomorrow, it's not all going to be over with a big splash and a bomb, that the human race is improving, that we have things to be proud of as humans." -Gene Roddenberry about Star Trek
Registered: May 1999
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posted
Of course! Really, I do sometimes wonder if celebrities look up all the strange things (fanfics, photoshopped images etc.) posted about them online.
-------------------- Justice inclines her scales so that wisdom comes at the price of suffering. -Aeschylus, Agamemnon
Registered: Aug 2002
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