-------------------- "The best defense is not a good offense. The best defense is a terrifyingly accurate and devastatingly powerful offense, with multiply-overlapping kill zones and time-on-target artillery strikes." -- Laurence, Archangel of the Sword
Registered: Mar 1999
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capped
I WAS IN THE FUTURE, IT WAS TOO LATE TO RSVP
Member # 709
posted
Once upon Jesus Christ's pet gerbil's birthday, Omega restarted his magnificent action of eating. The insipid knackwurst started fermenting wildly while Rupert Murdoch got high on Frenchmen's baguettes. Whimpering James Dean melodies played over Adolf Eichmann's choking cough. Ronald Sandoval theorems state explosions never occur during cracking lithium. However, they randomly... KABLAMMO! "Holy crap on fire!" Tony Orlando died happy. "Christoper Moltisante...? Who?" You think this is funny? Hardly. "I wouldn't laugh if Tony Soprano exploded," Dr. Jennifer Melfi said. Pauli Walnuts has walnuts upon successful Sultan Hashem Ahmed's daughter's nipples without permission. Jonathan Frakes, Scott Hamilton, Stiffler, Yuri Gagarin, and I rode her. On "Tuesday's Man", is Dolph Lundgren buggered by Queen Elizabeth after teatime? Fat people explode messily. Or so I heard. Chipmonks misspelled 'chipmunks.' Slartibartfast managed the planetary interference array badly. Michael_T opposes Babylon 5, only it continues to intrigue his penis. Incongruously, Dolph Lundgren jumped over Homer Simpson and Patrick Stewart with a zamboni. "Born Slippy", as it were, pertains to Dolph Lundgren's tongue smells. Mike Shinoda thinks Dolph Lundgren rides holographic man-trains. Miss Lundgren watches Little Lundgren boinking children vigorously into submission. However, Dolph fucked himself up by spanking George Bush with a flounder. Meanwhile, Jean-Claude van Damme kissed Charles Capps' Bronco. Dolph Lundgren man-trained Jeff Benson's friend Lee Kelly to orgasm. Jiang Zemin died. Bashar Assad farted. Bosnia and Herzegovina burned. Gene Ray had survived Aleksandr Soljenitsyne's books by hiding in bed. Meanwhile, Alexander Solzenytsin farted on Vladimir Kryuchkov's niece. Batman! Porcelain! TSN shattered Omega's clarinet's possibilities. Donald Rumsfeld mates during press dinners despite foreign chicks being naked. Betty White lookalikes, First of Two and Seven of Nine pooped themselves purple while reading Little Red Riding Hood, Pornographic Edition. Batman's Cleveland Steamer chugged mightily through Man-Train Central Station on the Jubilee Line. Love is cruel, consisting of contradiction, betrayal and gigantic throbbing thumb tacks. Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwilllantysiliogoggoch had spelling mistakes in each of its chipmonks.
-------------------- "This is why you people think I'm so unknowable. You don't listen!" - God, "God, the Devil and Bob"
Registered: Mar 1999
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-------------------- I'm slightly annoyed at Hobbes' rather rude decision to be much more attractive than me though. That's just rude. - PsyLiam, Oct 27, 2005.
Registered: May 1999
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posted
Fair do's. I can well imagine Jeff's unfairly-attainaed scores suddenly coming to resemble a hard corn-meal shell containing some variety of Mexican filling, including but not limited to guacamole, salsa, sour cream, and refried beans. . .
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