posted
However can I carry on with my life? I must conquer this new world of factories and buildings, no matter the cost!
-------------------- Yes, you're despicable, and... and picable... and... and you're definitely, definitely despicable. How a person can get so despicable in one lifetime is beyond me. It isn't as though I haven't met a lot of people. Goodness knows it isn't that. It isn't just that... it isn't... it's... it's despicable.
Registered: Mar 1999
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quote:Originally posted by Styrofoaman: To the salt-water snorting she-devil?
No, the canary.
quote:Originally posted by Styrofoaman: Then how do you know it's going well?
Because they're both happy, having the 1337 seXX0rs, still together after eight months, and they're both happy.
-------------------- The philosopher's stone. Those who possess it are no longer bound by the laws of equivalent exchange in alchemy. They gain without sacrifice and create without equal exchange. We searched for it, and we found it.
Registered: Mar 1999
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quote:Originally posted by Peregrinus: For what it's worth, I've been with Jen for four years and eight months.
And Jen is all young and cute and nice and stuff. Damn your eyes.
No, but Siggy, look. You think girls don't like you. Here's a little secret I picked up along the way: girls are kind of stupid. Listen to some older Elvis Costello records. Blood and Chocolate in particular. Then go out and do something selfish that you like.
Clearly none of us on this board would qualify as studs. Those who would are merely deceiving themselves. There's just something about knowing the photon torpedo compliment of an Intrepid class starship or arguing the canonicity of TAS that seems to be anethema to sex with the female population at large, and that's ok. So now with hardly any provocation I'm going to ignore this lack of studliness and deign to give you stupid BX love advice:
You know in your heart that you are a charming and wonderful fellow. We see it. I see it, at least. And if they aren't able to see that, well then it only goes to prove my above point: girls are stupid. Part of the problem may be that you are chasing the wrong girls.
Honestly, a lot of it is the age, and some of it is that it's college. Girls in college still believe that Orlando Bloom with Brad Pitt's eyes, Vin Diesel's voice, Cary Grant's charm and Michael Eisner's pocketbooks would have even a remote interest in them. This is a mistaken assumption (fast-forward ten years). They also believe that popular and muscular boys with names like Jake and Joe have an interest in them which extends beyond the front of their chests.
Still there will be a select few who have figured out that The Real World� is anything but, that people on TV are different than people you meet on the street and that They Might Be Giants is a good band. And these, of course, are the ones to focus on.
You're able to make friends with girls. This is a good sign. You know that you are a good person. You have things which make you happy (other than food). These are things to focus on. Move early and move confidently. I did a poll to figure out who went on the most dates and do you know what I found? It's the guys who asked girls out the most. Statistics are amazing. Do you know what else is amazing? The effect a little confidence has on women.
Things that will always be sexy to women: (in order)
confidence
humor
people who are genuinely interested/engaged in things other than the fronts of their chests (preferrably not sports)
looking like brad pitt
cool hair
larege amounts of cash
callousness
Women file men into four categories: Protector-Providers, Hunky Beef-cakes, Just-Friends, and Rapists. The trick is not falling into the last two categories.
Things will never be sexy to women:
morbid depression (there is a goth qualifier, but trying to picture you in eyeliner more or less negates this)
neediness
star trek
squalor
Do you know what's way easier than trying to transform a self-absorbed moronic asshole gunning towards a miserable life of continually mounting disappointments culminating in a tragic (if strangely fitting) death? Finding someone smart and fun who understands the importance of back-rubs and doesn't mind if you don't look like Ethan Hawke.
Registered: Sep 2000
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posted
Thank you, Balaam, and I'll try to keep all of that in mind.
-------------------- The philosopher's stone. Those who possess it are no longer bound by the laws of equivalent exchange in alchemy. They gain without sacrifice and create without equal exchange. We searched for it, and we found it.
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
Would this be a bad time to mention Jen loves They Might Be Giants...?
You left out one tragic factor that I think bears mentioning. Far, far too often women opt for the guy whose life is going nowhere (in a worse way than most sci-fi geeks). One of Jen's periods of doubt about our relationship (which women go through, so get used to it) was ended by a rather harsh dose of reality-projection on the part of yours truly. I said that yes I was in a rough spot and have been for some time. I'm up to big things in my life, and the higher the wall you throw your hat over, the harder it's going to be to get to it. I am either going to succeed brilliantly or fail horrendously. Not much middle ground. The tempting factor was and is much more stable -- good income as a Ford mechanic and all that. However I pointed out to her that if she went with him, one of two general scenarios would play out. Either she would stick to her dreams and become a world-renowned virologist and he would feel increasingly inadequate and resentful, or she would sacrifice her big dreams for a life of secure mediocrity with her husband the Ford mechanic and live in the suburbs with 2.5 kids and a mortgage and feel increasingly inadequate and resentful. To sum up, he's a great friend and she loves him, but his dreams aren't of the same scope as hers.
And the other massively worrisome (to me) trait is women who pick abusers. I'm sure many of you are nodding knowingly at this point, and have your own horror stories to add, so I'll leave off for now.
--Jonah
-------------------- "That's what I like about these high school girls, I keep getting older, they stay the same age."
--David "Woody" Wooderson, Dazed and Confused
Registered: Feb 2001
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quote:Originally posted by Balaam Xumucane: Clearly none of us on this board would qualify as studs. Those who would are merely deceiving themselves.
Aban, of course, being the very notable exception.
Down boy, down!
-------------------- Yes, you're despicable, and... and picable... and... and you're definitely, definitely despicable. How a person can get so despicable in one lifetime is beyond me. It isn't as though I haven't met a lot of people. Goodness knows it isn't that. It isn't just that... it isn't... it's... it's despicable.
Registered: Mar 1999
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posted
Yes.... women love confidence...... *nods* A boy with confidence can get just about whatever he wants - as long as he's not TOO confident. 'Cause if he is, then he becomes something at girls hate.
So there ya have it boys - it's a fine line, but walk it well and you may "get some"!
~LOA
-------------------- "You are anal twattypoo who has ruined my good mood" PsyLiam to TSN May 01,2006.
Registered: Mar 1999
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Cartman
just made by the Presbyterian Church
Member # 256
posted
quote:Originally posted by Balaam Xumucane: girls are kind of stupid
And if that doesn't restore your faith in humanity, nothing will. B)
Now I am not the great dispenser of Truth and Wisdom, having never actually beaten the Fortune Cookie stage myself, so on the subject of women my mind is, well, blank, and relationships are as alien to me as, uh, ET, but I have been given assurances by a reputable source (aka. life, as far as mine can be construed as representative data) that a healthy sense of humor and a little self-respect go much, much further than superficial traits like body fat percentage and, erh, horse riding skills. Yeah.
And I cannot believe I just handed out advice on mankind's biggest conundrum ever. Pinch me, somebody.
Registered: Nov 1999
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